Niece's school trouble - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 8 Old 07-30-2014, 08:18 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Niece's school trouble

I really need some advice about my 15yr old niece please! Last night we were looking over one of her essays together and she happened to mention that some of her friends were using essay writing services (this is the one I think: http://fastessaywritingservice.com ) in order to get their papers in by the deadline - and she made the point that it was unfair that other kids in her class were getting ahead.

We've talked about study methods, and how it's sometimes not a bad thing to proofread friends' work (so long as changes are made by the owner of the essay!), but this has never come up before. Has anyone ever encountered these services? Would appreciate any advice anyone can give!
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#2 of 8 Old 07-30-2014, 10:31 AM
 
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It's cheating and if she gets caught she will fail. F. Many schools have software to check to plagiarism.

Her friends are playing a very dangerous game with higher stakes than they realize. If they fail a high-school class due to cheating, every college they apply to will see it on their transcript. This is not only immoral behavior, but it's very foolish behavior.

One of the things that I emphasize to my kids is that the point of school is to develop their minds. Her friends aren't getting ahead, they are failing to get out of the assignment what they are supposed to. By not practicing their writing and getting feedback on it, they aren't getting ready for what comes next, including high stakes testing where they have to write essays on the fly.

Or writing as part of a career. (My DH is an engineer and does far more writing than most people would expect. I'm getting certified to teach special ed and will need to write a lot for IEPs and such. Pretty much all professional jobs required at least some writing. One might as well take the opportunities presented in school to actually LEARN this skill so one can be AHEAD of the slackers latter)

If she is such a great writer already, it wouldn't take her much time to crank out a paper. The only reason it is tempting to cheat is because she has to work at it, because she needs the practice.

but everything has pros and cons  shrug.gif

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#3 of 8 Old 07-30-2014, 02:32 PM
 
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Originally Posted by pumabearclan View Post
I continually reinforced the difference between achieving and learning. .
yes -- the way this made sense to my kids is that they spent years swimming competitively and it really taught them the concept of "personal best." How one places in a swim meet has a lot to do with who else shows up that day and how "on" they are, however, your personal best is your personal best. In swimming, you know it in fractions of a second. If you go to a tiny meet and get first but didn't swim your best, you know it. If you go to a huge meet and don't place at all but swim your best time ever, you know it -- you know that you swam better even though you didn't get a ribbon for it.

Every assignment at school should reflect a student's personal best, even though it isn't as objectively scored as a swim time.

Kids who are hung up on achieving, which is how they compare to others in the same class or same school, miss fail to understand that their goal is their personal best. The other people who happened to be in the pool or class or the school at the same time really don't have anything to do how they are doing and what they are learning. It's just an accident of fate who else shows up. Its nothing to guide your own actions or efforts.

but everything has pros and cons  shrug.gif


Last edited by Linda on the move; 07-31-2014 at 07:18 AM.
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#4 of 8 Old 07-30-2014, 02:38 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Sammy80 View Post
I really need some advice about my 15yr old niece please! Last night we were looking over one of her essays together and she happened to mention that some of her friends were using essay writing services (this is the one I think: http://fastessaywritingservice.com ) in order to get their papers in by the deadline - and she made the point that it was unfair that other kids in her class were getting ahead.

We've talked about study methods, and how it's sometimes not a bad thing to proofread friends' work (so long as changes are made by the owner of the essay!), but this has never come up before. Has anyone ever encountered these services? Would appreciate any advice anyone can give!
This is another reason to pull the focus off of grades. I know, it's a difficult thing to do with college applications looming but in reality, it's not always the best students who get the best grades. Good students take some intellectual risks. They take different approaches. They don't always give the "right" answers. Papers that get "A's" don't always reflect higher understanding. Sometimes they just say exactly what a teacher wants to hear. Yes, there are those that cheat and they rarely seem to pay for it while it's happening. Heck, we've known parents who've admitted to writing papers for their kids.

Just keep encouraging your niece to think and to focus on herself and her own development.

Married mom of two, DD 17 and DS 13.
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#5 of 8 Old 07-31-2014, 04:16 AM
 
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You should not support your daughter to do cheating. Make her understand that what her friends are doing is cheating and they will have to face the consequences sometime soon. And if she tries to write the essays on her own then it will benefit her in the future. And maybe you can also report it to the teacher.
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#6 of 8 Old 07-31-2014, 07:20 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for all your comments everyone, they've been really helpful and I feel like I've got a better way to tackle her questions now. I was just so surprised that these sites are so common and that so many students use them. I guess I've been a bit naive!
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#7 of 8 Old 08-06-2014, 02:40 AM
 
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Children should always learn on their own and professional essay writing services are like a joke. Developing the children's mind is the most crucial part of childhood and your niece's friends are already going to suffer because of this. Tell your niece about this so that she stops feeling bad about herself.

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#8 of 8 Old 08-26-2014, 01:27 PM
 
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Everyone has given good advice! Also, tell your niece that a site that has this sentence AT THE TOP OF ITS FRONT PAGE
Quote:
Get a unique academic paper help for reasonable prices, communicating with the writer instantly.
is not going to provide anyone with a perfectly written paper. She could practice her skills by rewriting that sentence correctly!

Mama to a boy EnviroKid treehugger.gif 9 years old and a new little girl EnviroBaby baby.gif!

I write about parenting, environment, cooking, and more. computergeek2.gif

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