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Young teens babysitting: for profit or for the love of kids?

3K views 15 replies 14 participants last post by  Letitia 
#1 ·
My mom has been pushing this a bit with me and my daughter: Babysitting as a way to earn money.


Now that my daughter is 13 my mom is urging her to babysit. I've had some epiphanies since my teen years. I now realize that babysitting is serious responsibility and that a teenager should be able to handle difficult situations, or at least have someone who is willing to be called in to help if needed. I view it as a paid job AND a service to the community. Plus, teenagers should be willing and liking to spend time with little kids. My daughter loves little kids, but not to take care of them.
But my mom is getting insistent. She says that kids babysitting is purely to earn money and they don't have to like the kids.
I told her that I don't think that is a good reason to babysit, just for profit, and that it's a service to the community and that teenagers should like doing it.


Am I right? Or is my mom's view acceptable?
 
#2 ·
Teens shouldn't babysit if they aren't self-motivated to do it. Not all teens have the temperament. Of those that do, some prefer working with kids in a more structured environment like a day camp or a classroom as opposed to unstructured one-on-one sitting. There are other ways to make money that can be more appropriate and preferable to the individual.

If your 13-year-old is not interested and not pushing for the opportunity, I'd just ask your mother to stay out of it.
 
#3 ·
You don't have to like the kids, but you have to take the responsibility seriously. And it certainly is easier and more fun if you like the kids and they like you!!

I think kids interested in babysitting should take a babysitting course (often offered by the Red Cross) to learn basic skills. Even if you have been around younger children all your life, it's good to go over what to do in case of choking, etc.
 
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#4 · (Edited)
I don't think love of kids is necessary motivation, though it's a nice bonus. However I think love of money is a really poor motivation. I think what is essential is a self-motivated drive for taking that kind of important and at times complex responsibility. I find most kids to be pretty good judges of when they're ready for specific types of responsibility. If your dd isn't motivated for this type of work at this age, I agree with you, it would be a mistake to push it.

Miranda
 
#5 ·
My mom has been pushing this a bit with me and my daughter: Babysitting as a way to earn money.

Now that my daughter is 13 my mom is urging her to babysit. I've had some epiphanies since my teen years. I now realize that babysitting is serious responsibility and that a teenager should be able to handle difficult situations, or at least have someone who is willing to be called in to help if needed. I view it as a paid job AND a service to the community. Plus, teenagers should be willing and liking to spend time with little kids. My daughter loves little kids, but not to take care of them.
But my mom is getting insistent. She says that kids babysitting is purely to earn money and they don't have to like the kids.
I told her that I don't think that is a good reason to babysit, just for profit, and that it's a service to the community and that teenagers should like doing it.

Am I right? Or is my mom's view acceptable?
My sister's kids babysit a lot and also act as mother's helpers. She actually limits their salary to $3-4 an hour and encourages them to do housework as well. She thinks it is an housekeeping and child care are important skills to learn and that paid work has value at a young age (responsibility, time management, money management, etc.) she doesn't want them to get us to "easy money" and reject other first job opportunities later (retail, food service, etc.).

It seems to be working. Her kids are lovely and very responsible.
 
#7 ·
I think most parents who are looking for a babysitter would be much more confident knowing the babysitter actually enjoys children vs. just being in it to make money.

I started babysitting for the family a few doors down when I was 12 (my parents made me get infant-child CPR certified first). I begged and begged to start before that, because I wanted to earn my own money, yes, but also because I really loved kids. There were other ways to make money back then - walking dogs, mowing lawns, selling cookies (I did all those things too at various times), but babysitting provided an opportunity to play mom and have a slightly more stable source of fun money with consistent jobs.

I have never hired a baby sitter in 9+ years of parenting and the idea of hiring any of the 13 yr olds I know today (with maybe 1 or 2 exceptions) makes me shudder. I just wouldn't do it...but I absolutely wouldn't want to hire someone who didn't especially love being around little kids and have the patience (that comes from love) to put up with the exhausting nature of childcare.

I think your mom may have her own ideas about what a typical 13yo should be doing, but if I were you I would say basically what you said here. Caring for someone else's children is a HUGE responsibility and it should not be undertaken lightly like a job at the local dip n dots stand. I think your mama needs to step off a bit. ;-)
 
#8 ·
Thank you all for the feedback.

lightheartedmom, I agree, she definitely needs to step back as likes to put in all her dollars about how I should be raising her. I've started to tell her to back off delicately and at the right time. She is a narcissist and refuses to even let me get in a word or hear me out sometimes. It's like walking on glass around her. But every now and then, especially more recently, she's been laying off or getting the hint. I just got her to get off my back about my kid's hair. yeesh.

I feel better, now, about not pushing my daughter into babysitting. I thought of selling cookies, but that's something that I would have to come along with, since going door to door is dangerous. And there was a woman who recently vanished last week without a trace in my community and the perp is still at large, so you never know. Plus, we just don't have enough baking supplies.

She's been making a lot of elastic band, rainbow loom stuff. Perhaps she can sell a few of those. That's if she wants. I'm not going to pressure her into working right now. She's been going through a lot and needs all the mental rest she can get this summer, and then in Sept, she will have to put all her energy into school. There will be plenty of time in later years for her to earn cash.
 
#9 ·
I was never all that enthusiastic about playing with the kids I babysat. (I worried I would be a bad mom, lol! I like kids a lot more now, thankfully.) My best gigs were late night ones, where the kids were either already in bed or on their way to bed when I got there. I was very responsible and enjoyed reading bedtime stories, so I liked those the best! :grin:
My 15 year old has not had any interest in babysitting. She earns money by doing odd jobs for people and will look for a paid job next year when she's 16. I suggested babysitting a couple of times but never pushed it.
 
#10 ·
I've been babysitting since I was very young, probably under 10. Now as a parent I don't know what all the adults around me were thinking. I don't think I would hire a babysitter until she was 16 or so. I have only one girl that I would deem acceptable, I'm very picky, even with adult sitters though. The girl I know, loves babies, plays with my dd whenever we are at gatherings together, and protects her from the older, rougher kids. That's what I look for in a sitter, and someday when my dd is old enough to babysit, I want it to be her idea, and not for the money. It's a huge responsibility. She would need to be prepared for a lot of situations that could come up.
 
#13 ·
Ironic, given the level of responsibility, but teens who take care of children are often paid less than those who do yard work or snow shoveling.

Instead of baby sitting, would you consider encouraging her to do something else? Leaf bagging, snow shoveling, gardening, running errands or dog walking are all possibilities for a teen who wants to earn some money. They probably all pay more, and don't come with the tremendous responsibility of child care. This would probably satisfy your mom's desire to see her granddaughter working and could be a good experience.
 
#15 ·
Babysitting is not just another way to earn money! I think your mom is completely wrong in this! It is a serious responsibility which one should take only when they like to do it and are capable of handling the challenges that come with it. Kids should never be looked upon as a money-making opportunity. That's really a very bad thing to teach your children! I think you should not push your DD into this when she is not ready!
 
#16 ·
I strongly disagree with your mom. There are other ways to earn money, and if your daughter does not want do to a job that requires taking on one of the hugest responsibilities I can imagine, I don't think she should have to.

What I haven't seen mentioned in other posters' responses is that I think you should be sure that your daughter knows that you support her in this decision and that you have her back. If it were my child, I would talk to her with grandma not around, let her know that you support her decision, and that you have talked with grandma to stop pestering her about it.
 
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