POLL: Do you expect dd to tell you when her period starts? - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

View Poll Results: Do you expect your daughter to tell you when she starts her period?
Yes, I expect her to tell me as soon as it happens 81 54.00%
Yes, whenever she feels ready to 43 28.67%
Not sure 3 2.00%
No, she deserves privacy about her body 10 6.67%
Other (please explain) 13 8.67%
Voters: 150. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 02-02-2006, 05:06 PM
 
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I'd expect her (if and when I'm blessed with her) to tell me bc I think we'd have that type of relationship. I wouldn't demand it.

I knew all about AF but was clueless that I had gotten it... it was just light brown discharge at first. My mom noticed while doing laundry and told me!

Prenatal/Pediatric Chiropractor (Diplomate) , raising the next generation drug-free!
DS - CJ :, the love of my life
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Old 02-03-2006, 03:17 PM
 
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Originally Posted by whateverdidiwants
FTR, I did not tell my mom when I started my period. She was very closemouthed about sex and I didn't think it was her business.
My mother never discussed sex or periods with me. I had read up about it, though. There WAS a box of pads in the bathroom closet. I was 15 when I got it, didn't tell her. When the box of pads ran out, I had to tell her. She was hurt that I didn't tell her, and cried. Why the hell should I tell her when she seemed to think it unnecessary to ever discuss it with me? I was supposed to miraculously know all about these things because she was too embarrassed to talk about it. Her big thing after I did tell her was to make sure to hide the pads or later tampax so that my older brother would not see the box. Lord knows it might have blinded him if he knew his sisters menstruated.

My daughters can tell me or not as they choose, I wouldn't expect it and wouldn't feel hurt if they didn't.
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Old 02-03-2006, 04:17 PM
 
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I am raising my daughters to hopefully be comfortable enough to tell me that kind of thing. In Hindu culture, the start of first menses is a very special time. There is a small ceremony and family celebration to welcome a girl into womanhood. She is treated like a princess and given gifts to help symbolize her new status. So she'd better tell me!

7yo: "Mom,I know which man is on a quarter and which on is on a nickel. They both have ponytails, but one man has a collar and the other man is naked. The naked man was our first president."
 
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Old 02-04-2006, 02:08 AM
 
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I never told my mom. We never had any conversations regarding sex. There was a box of pads in the bathroom. I was 15. We never had any conversations about sex until she found my birth control pills in my school bag when i was 16, then she just yelled at me and called me a slut (I wasn't living at home by then) needless to say, I was pregnant at 17 (It was hard to get those pills.)

My dd is my fourth baby. As she is only 9 mos. I don't know how our relationship is going to go, but I hope that we have open communication between us. And I would love to share this experience with her. I hope we can celebrate her becoming a woman. I do have a 9 year old ds, and I feel like we have great communication and he asks me all sorts of questions like "what does it mean when a girl has a crush on you? " I really hope my kids and I maintain open communication.


I voted "other" because I don't "expect " her to tell me , but I really hope she would so I can help to make it a positive experience.
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Old 02-04-2006, 08:46 PM
 
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ok well i have to say (i'm only 13) i personally didn't know how to approach my mom with the whole idea when it acctually happened... i think in her mind we are "very close" but i don't ever really tell her when i like a guy or much... its usually through email if i do tell her... i dunno i guess we are really close in some ways like we are open to each other but i'm more open to other adults about it than i am to her... i don't understand why a mom would be mad about it if their child didn;t say anything . you just have to be TOTALLY open with your kids and from the time they are really little you have to be open with them about about... well everything and as they start coming closer to the "maturing age" its good to talk to them about it more often. DON'T BE TOOOOO PUSHY WITH IT time will come ... just always have some "spare equipment" on hand.. sometimes i like to use hippy pads and other times i use regular disposable pads from HEB or whatever i guess its just the way your mom does it or who influences you cause my mom is totally NOT a hippie but my "sister" (just a close family friend) is a hippie and she uses hippie pads and then cups... so i guess just have a variety or if you guys are TRULY close enough... talk to her about what she would like to use...

if you moms out there have any questions for me... SHOOT!
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Old 02-05-2006, 03:11 PM
 
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I started in school and told my mum in the car on the way home. She was confused that I'd let her do the after school mumsie chat without interrupting. Seemed to assume that I was physic .enough to know that having my period was a reason interrupt instead of politely letting her talk:
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Old 02-05-2006, 03:15 PM
 
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Originally Posted by MareliMoo728
ok well i have to say (i'm only 13) i personally didn't know how to approach my mom with the whole idea when it acctually happened... i think in her mind we are "very close" but i don't ever really tell her when i like a guy or much... its usually through email if i do tell her... i dunno i guess we are really close in some ways like we are open to each other but i'm more open to other adults about it than i am to her... i don't understand why a mom would be mad about it if their child didn;t say anything . you just have to be TOTALLY open with your kids and from the time they are really little you have to be open with them about about... well everything and as they start coming closer to the "maturing age" its good to talk to them about it more often. DON'T BE TOOOOO PUSHY WITH IT time will come ... just always have some "spare equipment" on hand.. sometimes i like to use hippy pads and other times i use regular disposable pads from HEB or whatever i guess its just the way your mom does it or who influences you cause my mom is totally NOT a hippie but my "sister" (just a close family friend) is a hippie and she uses hippie pads and then cups... so i guess just have a variety or if you guys are TRULY close enough... talk to her about what she would like to use...

if you moms out there have any questions for me... SHOOT!
ITA,
I'm 15 and grew up thinking its a fact of life. I never even considered not telling my mum because to me it was a fact of life and not a private issue. A lot of my friends are amazed about how open I am about these things.
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Old 02-06-2006, 12:42 AM
 
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It was kind of a shock when she switched to tampons, though; I reached for one and the box was empty!
That happened here too! A little warning would have been nice!

We're pretty open about that sort of things around here. I think we all deserve a little extra attention during that time.
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