playing dumb when trouble arises - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 3 Old 01-03-2002, 12:27 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I have a very pre teen 10 year old that seems to be playing dumb. His stepfather is very angry because he thinks he is "playing us" like we are stupid. I on the other hand think of my angel as wonderful and always give him the benefit of the doubt. But he gets in trouble at school and with sitters and has been caught in lies right and left lately. How do you help shape your children to not be deceitful when we live in a culture that values it so much. Where it is everywhere, and you even find yourself being deceitful? Is this a regular symptom of the preteen mental complex. Are we just being tested to see if we will catch on? Any suggestions will be great. Especially on what to do with him.
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#2 of 3 Old 04-01-2002, 06:52 PM
 
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I was just going to post a similar thread concerning my nine year old - but I just read yours. We are in a similar boat. Our nine year old boy has just started telling lies - it took us by suprise! We have rarely punished him in the past, but, for lying we are. We have also explained to him how important it is that we can trust him, and how dissapointed we are. I don't know how to handle it - I guess it is my first test on the road to pre-teen hood.
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#3 of 3 Old 04-01-2002, 07:35 PM
 
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As the parent of 19, 17, 15 and 14 yr old (and a 6 mo old...) The best book I ever read was by a guy named Bodenhammer(sp?) called "Parent in Control" While it seems a little extreme in places, you do NOT have to apply the extreme stuff to your kid if the kid doesnt warrant it! He stresses staying on them, fostering attachment, & being consistant. In my experience, now is the time to nip it in the bud!

You can do it!
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