When to let go unsupervised? - Mothering Forums

 
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#1 of 6 Old 01-28-2006, 01:34 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hello,

When do you think would be the appropriate time to let your child go to the movies, mall, etc. with a group of friends, without adults?

Thanks.
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#2 of 6 Old 01-28-2006, 01:45 PM
 
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I think more information is needed in order to provide an appropriate answer. A lolt depends on the personality of the child, the friends s/he would be going out with, and the nature of the neighborhood or town they would be going around unsupervised in. I think I started letting my now-18 year old go out unsupervised when she was 14. She was an only child at that time, and was quite mature for her age. We live in a small town so it is easy for me, or any of my fellow parents, to track her down if needed. The neighborhood is safe.
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#3 of 6 Old 01-28-2006, 02:27 PM
 
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I think there is also a large range of what "unsupervised" mean. I have seen younger groups of kids (8-10 years) "unsupervised" at a movie theater--- but at least one of their parents is basically waiting in the lobby, kwim?

My oldest is 7 so I don't have any advice, I just like reading this forum w/a combination of intrigue and terror.

 

 

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#4 of 6 Old 01-28-2006, 09:30 PM
 
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My dd#1, 13yo, has just started to hang out 'unsupervised' with kids after school. The JR High is fairly close to downtown and the kids want to go there after school. She is to tell us who she will be hanging out with and then they have to come into dh store (coffee shop) to meet him so he knows who she is with. This has worked so far. dd is very responsible about doing this and honest. She has just started doing this, (the past few months) and it has been working well so far. dh employees also keep an eye on her which is kinda cute (Huge windows in corner shop).
As a family, we talk about drugs and sex quite a bit. It appears more than her friends' families. We have open communication and she talks freely with us about the social things going on within her group.
We trust her and we believe that she is making good decisions when 'unsupervised'. :

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#5 of 6 Old 01-29-2006, 02:42 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nonconformnmom
I think more information is needed in order to provide an appropriate answer. A lolt depends on the personality of the child, the friends s/he would be going out with, and the nature of the neighborhood or town they would be going around unsupervised in.
I agree. I think my oldest got to go places on his own when he was 13. He was always very mature for his age. My second oldest was 14. We live in a big city so I think I may be a bit more cautious.
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#6 of 6 Old 01-29-2006, 11:48 PM
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I think Rain was 10, but this was the sleepy little mall in a sleepy little ag town. OTOH, at 111 she was free to wander downtown Davis (college town) with friends while I taught, and at 12 she was getting around the Kansas City area via bus fairly well (although with friends who were slightly older and more knowledgable).

I think cell phones are wpnderful things. I wouldn't have been comfortable with any of it had she not had her cell phone.

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