teen arrested - traffic violations - WWYD? - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

View Poll Results: wwyd
get teh tickets fixed and deal with discipline at home but out of courts 25 100.00%
let him take the full consequences (which includes points toward his license and prob. $1k fines) 88 100.00%
come down hard. allow him to do nothing 14 100.00%
relax. take away several privileges but not everything. make him work it off w/ chores, etc. 22 100.00%
get basketball coach, school counselor, etc. involved to steer him in the right direction. 27 100.00%
something else i havent thought about. 9 100.00%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 6. You may not vote on this poll

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#61 of 62 Old 10-05-2006, 10:53 PM
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Originally Posted by Pandora114 View Post
I say he wants to be a grownup, break the law like a grownup, then he has to face the concequences of breaking the law as a grownup. Which means, let things fall as they may. He needs to learn the real concequences of breaking the law.

On the homefront, if he has fines, he needs to get a job to pay for said fines. or, if they have to be paid immideiately you pay them, and then he gets a job to pay YOU back for the fines.
Parental imposed concequenses will really mean nothing.

YOU dont react. Let the law handle it, he broke the law, he needs to deal with it.

Too many parents bail their kids out of trouble with the law in hopes they'll learn a lesson. That's not how they learn. The natural concequence for breaking the law is dealing with the law's concequences...

Have him clean around the house/yard to earn the money for fines.
I would have a list of things for him to do after school everyday and he couldn't see his gf or use the phone/computer until the things on the list were done.
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#62 of 62 Old 10-05-2006, 11:09 PM
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I would try to get the charges reduced. I think that if I were in this situation, not a lawyer, I would try to hire one if I could possibly swing it and try to get the charges reduced. For the same reason that I let my toddler fall off her ride-on toys but I don't let her fall down the stairs. There's a time to let your kid learn about the laws (of society or gravity) and a time to protect them from something really bad, yet still try to drive home that point, but without permanently damaging them. I would at least try to keep the points on the license and anything that will lead to higher insurance premiums from happening. Or he may end up as a young 20-something struggling to make ends meet who ends up driving around uninsured half the time (as I did). Heck, I'm almost 30 and there are still months where we just about have to decide between food and car insurance.

I'm a little less sure about the priveleges and compensation issues, so I'll stay out of that.
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