at what age would you leave your child home alone overnight - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 50 Old 01-24-2007, 07:36 PM
 
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Originally Posted by jane197 View Post
"depending on whether or not his brain dribbles out his ear in the next couple of years."

Oh..... I think you can pretty much count on that :>))
So far, I've been pleasantly surprised. He's more resistant to showers, can't seem to keep track of his clothes, and is occasionally somewhat surly and short-tempered (he denies this vehemently, however). Other than that, he's still the same person he always was. He's a great kid - I like him a lot.

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#32 of 50 Old 01-24-2007, 09:19 PM
 
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"He's more resistant to showers, can't seem to keep track of his clothes"

You mean the system of "sprinkling" the clothes around the bedroom floor isn't working for him? - lol. Maybe that is a girl thing. My daughter's bedroom floor looks like she has experienced several major earthquakes in the last several weeks even though I have not heard of any strong seismic activity in the area :>)

But hey, you have to pick your battles, and her own personal organization system works for her -as she amazingly knows where everything is.
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#33 of 50 Old 01-26-2007, 01:50 AM
 
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How about at 25! NO really I think that it depends on the kid. If yours is a good kid and very responsible 16 would be fine. If not I think that I would wait a while. It's alot of responsibility to be home alone and can even be sacary to older kids. Heck when my husband works nights it still freaks me out a wee bit and I'm about to have my 3rd child!
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#34 of 50 Old 01-26-2007, 02:08 AM
 
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I was 16, nearly 17. My parents still don't really trust me alone, though. I'm not entirely sure why, especially since I loathe the party scene and would therefore keep my alone-ness a secret closely guarded.
But there are also people I know who, if they were my kids, I would NEVER let them stay home overnight. So much irresponsibility.
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#35 of 50 Old 01-26-2007, 02:21 PM
 
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My daughter is 14. I am NOT overprotective at all.

But, I am no where near ready to leave her overnight. I don't think I could sleep, knowing she was home alone. If she had a sibling, maybe I would. I think when I do the first time, it will be with a friend. Just incase she gets scared.

This is an excellent thread idea though. This gives me some idea of what would be considered normal.
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#36 of 50 Old 01-26-2007, 02:31 PM
 
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21? 25? At 14, if we were alone at home, there would have been a party at our house. Then again, I was completely 100% responsible babysitting others' children for a weekend at 11 (and I did it, for a baby and a 3 year old) and never ever had a friend over while babysitting. My own home, on the other hand, was a perfect place to have a party!!
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#37 of 50 Old 01-26-2007, 11:11 PM
 
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18. maybe 17, depending on circumstances. But it would depend on the child and his/her comfort & maturity level and wherther they were chomping at the rebellion bit thinking a party involving alcohol and drugs would be a brillaint thing to host.
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#38 of 50 Old 01-28-2007, 12:30 AM - Thread Starter
 
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my husband clarified this for me and said 30!!
i think i agree

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#39 of 50 Old 01-28-2007, 12:35 AM
 
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Depends on the specific child.

14-ish sounds like a good number, though.

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#40 of 50 Old 01-28-2007, 12:37 AM
 
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BTW, when I was a kid, my parents never really went away, so I don't remember staying home alone at night... but I did house-sit in my brother's house, alone, for a week when I was 16.

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#41 of 50 Old 01-31-2007, 12:37 PM
 
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Originally Posted by jane197 View Post
I hate it when my husband is gone overnight as well - I just don't sleep well. Guess what we don't know when we are young and naive can be a good thing in some ways :>))
Me too- the house does not squeak when he is home and there are never nighttime noises outside!!! What is up with that??!!??

My oldest is 11 and I just started leaving the 3 of them for an hour so i can run to the store or gym and get a bit done while dh is out of town. So overnight is a ways away.
I was left around 14 and had MAJOR parties at the house.. but dd is far more mature than I was at her age so I am thinking 14ish sounds good!
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#42 of 50 Old 02-01-2007, 04:36 AM
 
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My parents always had a relative stay with us if they were gone
overnight. The first time they went away, overnight, without an
adult in the home was when we were all in college. My youngest
sibling would've been 18. I actually think this was very smart of
them. We were all good and trustworthy kids, but, personally, I
felt a bit overwhelmed and lonely when I, the oldest, was left in
charge of my siblings for too long.

My opinion is that it's nice to have a trustworthy grown-up around.
By the way, none of the kids in my family were of the detest-adult
variety. It was a special treat to have an aunt or uncle or such stay
with us and spend time with us.

peace,
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#43 of 50 Old 02-01-2007, 09:57 PM
 
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tarted staying home alone for several hours at a time when I was 9. By the time I was 13 I was staying home alone overnight. I don't remember when I first stayed home alone for a weekend, but I was doing it every other weekend when I was 16. My parents had a large ranch 4 hours from where we lived, and my dad was there a ton of the time. My mom would go to visit him on the weekends and I hated going so I stayed home. I was really pretty good in general, but defiantly did a few things my mom would NOT have approved of. Actually I lied to her about some of the stuff that went on. I'd have mini parties with my 3 best friends (2 girls and 1 boy). But we didn't drink, or smoke or anything, and nothing sexual ever went on. Mostly we watched movies. One time we had an indoor water fight. And on a dare the boy slept naked once. But nobody saw him naked, lol, he was under blankets the whole time! A few time a couple other kids came over and they drank a little, but I never did. Not then anyway...
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#44 of 50 Old 02-01-2007, 10:09 PM
 
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#45 of 50 Old 02-01-2007, 10:10 PM
 
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No, I don't think I'll be doing this. My 13 and 11 year olds are wonderful, but I think they could be pressed by friends into doing the wrong things if their friends knew we were out of town.
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#46 of 50 Old 11-27-2014, 06:23 AM
 
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Brings back bad memories

I'm here because I recently had a friends kid (aged 13) come by my house after being left alone for the weekend. He was eating just cereal so I asked him to come out with my husband and I to dinner. I really think this kid should not have been left alone overnight as he is not mature enough and often makes inappropriate and emotionally driven decisions.

For those of you who think this is a good idea, based on maturity level, consider that at aged 12 and 13 my sister and I were left alone for just an evening with my younger brothers. They were playing with matches and a candle they had found and when we came into the room they hid it behind the sofa. The sofa caught fire from behind and eventually enveloped the room in flames. A neighbor called the fire department after seeing the smoke which was great because we had tried to put it out OURSELVES with the front yard hose. We were lucky noone was seriously burned.

Maturity had nothing to do with the fact that we were too young to know what to do in this situation. Leaving children alone is always dangerous-especially with younger siblings.
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#47 of 50 Old 11-27-2014, 03:57 PM
 
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If I had a neurotypical child, I'd probably say 16 or 17 for being alone overnight.
Seeing as my kiddo is on the autism spectrum, I have no idea when he'll be able to spend a night alone. 21? 25? Ugh, makes me nervous just thinking about it!

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#48 of 50 Old 11-27-2014, 05:48 PM
 
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My kids were living in their own apartments by age 15, 16 and 17, so I definitely would have left them home alone overnight before then. I'm trying to think if it ever actually happened: would have been rare, since job and location make it tough for us to be away from home.

My kids were home a lot dealing with power outages and wood stoves and cooking meals and the like a lot from age 12 or so -- during the day. Of course this sort of thing is never entirely 100% without risk, though we were careful to teach them how to assess and minimize risk. It was worth it though, because it built confidence, competence and maturity. They handled independent living beautifully at quite young ages.

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#49 of 50 Old 11-27-2014, 08:08 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Susan AL View Post
For those of you who think this is a good idea, based on maturity level, consider that at aged 12 and 13 my sister and I were left alone for just an evening with my younger brothers. They were playing with matches and a candle they had found and when we came into the room they hid it behind the sofa. The sofa caught fire from behind and eventually enveloped the room in flames.....

Maturity had nothing to do with the fact that we were too young to know what to do in this situation. Leaving children alone is always dangerous-especially with younger siblings.

I think that its weird that this a thread from 2007 and that was revived by someone with 1 post who didn't know how to call 911.

but everything has pros and cons  shrug.gif

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#50 of 50 Old Today, 03:07 PM
 
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Susan, it's not that you were too young but that your parents, school, and other sources had not taught you the appropriate response to a fire. By the time I was 8, I had learned "leave the house immediately and call the fire department from somewhere else" from my parents, school, Girl Scouts, AND the "Will E. Survive" cartoons that appeared between TV shows on Saturday mornings. Children should be learning how to respond to a fire years before they are left alone in the house so that they respond appropriately if they are even alone in a ROOM when a fire starts. I've been talking to my son about it since he was 3.

Linda, it is weird that Susan was digging so deep into old threads, but I don't think it's all that weird that she was inspired to register and comment because she had this experience that she felt was relevant to the discussion. The thread is old, but the topic isn't obsolete. Oh, and not every area has 911 service even now, and when I was 12 we didn't have it where I lived--the separate 7-digit numbers for the fire department, police, and poison control were on a sticker attached to each of our phones.

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