Yeah, the whole emo thing is varying..
I was letting her hang with some of her "emo" friends while at school. I even let her dress how she wanted to a point. It was when she lied to them saying she cuts and was a "true emo" and then letting them cut her while at school, that I made her make a change. If other kids are going to do harm to your body and you let them, then things are going way too far and they don't respect your body, neither do you. We talked about the lying then, and changed other things. I thought she "got" it. (the whole lying thing and respecting your own body)
Now it's other kids and lying about other stuff. Ugh.
Okay, I know I did this too. I went through some things that could have been avoided and now know was a form of molestation. Even though I lied saying I knew what was going on, I didn't. I don't want things to get like that for my daughter. She doesn't realized the seriousness of it all.
My parents weren't involved in what I did. In fact, I was neglected and verbally abused growing up. I've made sure life for my daughter is different.
We are very involved in her life but things are still happening.
I do think she is trying to fit somewhere. I just need her to see that she doesn't have to lie to keep friends.
We've always believed in extra curricular activities. With her, it has been a matter of finding one she could do and liked. She's quit many different things. She has a hard time catching on to some things (like dance moves) and is not flexible at all. She has a hard time with aim as well, so things like volleyball and tennis are out for her she believes.
Hmmm, maybe when we move I'll look into the martial arts. It can't hurt for her to try.
Thank you so much for your replies. Raising teens is just not easy.
I hate that I'm seeing the beginning of her doing some of the same things I did, but what's also good about it is that I can catch it a bit easier/quicker because I know what to look for.