Is 13 too young to get a nose piercing? - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

View Poll Results: Should I let my 13yr.old pierce her nose?
Yes, why not? 86 36.91%
No. Please explain why not. 130 55.79%
Other. Please explain. 17 7.30%
Voters: 233. You may not vote on this poll

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#61 of 110 Old 07-11-2008, 04:56 PM
 
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I would definitely allow it, unless she's not at the same maturity level of most kids her age and wouldn't take care of it properly. I know my sister's daughter had hers done at 13, and two lip rings and took care of all of them perfectly (probably was better than I was with mine at 21 ) I think at 13 kids are old enough to make choices about piercings. It's not permanent like a tattoo and it doesn't leave a huge mark. And besides, even piercing your ears leaves a little mark, so what's the difference between that and a nose/lip piercing?
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#62 of 110 Old 07-11-2008, 05:16 PM
 
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I voted 'other' just because of the wording of the poll question. If the question had been 'Would you let YOUR daughter get her nose pierced at 13 yrs old?' I would have voted 'no'. But I don't know what you should do for your dd because every parent will have a different opinion about what is ok.

We have told our dd that we will not give our permission for any piercings other than her ears so if she wants them, she needs to wait until she doesn't need parental permission. We just really feel that anything like that needs to be purely her decision and to us that means being at the age that parental permission is no longer required.
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#63 of 110 Old 07-11-2008, 05:22 PM
 
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There was a great article in Mothering a few years ago about a mother allowing her daughter to get her navel pierced and the process the mom faced in coming to that conclusion. I'll see if I can dig it up online. It is really worth the read!

I would allow it if I felt like my dd could handle it. She is 13 now and I don't think she could do it at this point. Here, most everyone I know takes their kids to get their ears done at a professional shop that is very well know for their professionalism and cleanliness. Some piercers do it some don't because they are uncomfortable with children. I think that is fair!

I have my nose pierced and I am a teacher (both kids and college level) and I have never been asked about, asked to remove it, or even had anyone say anything about it.
It must district to district...

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#64 of 110 Old 07-11-2008, 05:26 PM
 
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I wouldn't allow it at that age and only because I believe kids are being pressured/brain washed into thinking they are adults at younger and younger ages. We need to stop allowing these kids to grow up so fast.

I guess I have some "old school grandma" in me.
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#65 of 110 Old 07-11-2008, 06:53 PM
 
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I would say that as long as she knows the commitment required to properly take care of it and is fully aware of the negative things that can happen because of it then it is her body. That being said, I am all for looking at pictures of infected piercings and things like that online before she does it. Personally I have had 2 liprings a nose ring a vertical labret and a nipple ring and have had them all done in very clean and safe places. Even with that precaution I ended up with a bacterial infection that entered my bloodstream after getting my 2nd lip ring. It had nothing to do with the place that did it, it was most likely caused by unsanitary conditions in a resteraunt I ate in after geting it. Infections can happen no matter how careful she is and she should know the possible outcomes....

Oh & for what its worth you can't tell I had my nosering at all.

for the oposite viewpoint my hubby thinks I'm a crazy piercing loving freak and in his exact words "a 12 year old is stupid and you are responsible for a 12 year old because it is stupid" He's not quite as open to accepting children as capable humans as I am...

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#66 of 110 Old 07-11-2008, 07:31 PM
 
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I wouldn't let my 13 y.o. get her nose pierced. She's asked, just because she was curious, and I said I have no problem with it all when she's 18 and she's on her own. I even think they're pretty. But not until she's an adult and can make that decision on her own. I prefer to be conservative when I make decisions for her.

And I'm open to changing my mind when she's older.

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#67 of 110 Old 07-11-2008, 07:56 PM
 
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I think I'd be fine with a small nose piercing. Not through kind that goes between the nostrils, but the kind that goes on one side. I think they are kind of pretty. I would talk to her about all of the issues that go along with piercing, and I hope she doesn't choose to get one because our church counsels against any piercings other than one in each ear, but in the end, I think I would leave that one up to her, because, after all, there are a lot of worse things she could be doing.

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#68 of 110 Old 07-11-2008, 08:04 PM
 
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I voted wrong, so subtract one of those "no" votes and add a "yes" vote.

Furthermore, are we seriously using potential unemployment at amusement parks as reasons to not allow a nose piercing?

If you seriously don't think her grades are high enough, say no. If you think she held up to her end of the bargain or that you can't really argue how she hasn't, keep your word.

Your word is more important than a nose piercing, IMO.

Beyond that, I think 13 is a highly appropriate age to pierce one's nose. She's officially a teen and so I woulnd't have a problem with it, myself.

The most important things about this, IMO, are:

1. Take her to a good piercer, not a gun-user.
2. Say what you mean and mean what you say.

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#69 of 110 Old 07-11-2008, 08:15 PM
 
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I see alot of extreme here. interesting to me.
this is a nose piercing that i assume is not going to include anything large and flashy. I dont even notice them around town anymore. People of every profession in this area have them. retail, grocery, drs, nurses, teachers, i could go on. Now i do notice other facial piercings. It is not too uncommon to see a small ring on the lip, or eyebrow, but not nearly as often.

I am in a smaller conservative community too. I expected that we see less than many other places would.

And for what its worth, the nose piercing is one of the best to heal. Not fastest, as the tounge heals faster, but it is not one I would put extra worry into like a surface piercing. Many teens get thier navel pierced and it is much much longer and more difficult to heal.

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#70 of 110 Old 07-11-2008, 08:31 PM
 
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So, I'm just curious here. . .why is getting your ears pierced okay, but your nose not okay? They both take cleaning, they both hurt a bit when being done, they both should be done by a professional piercer, they both can get caught on towels or become infected, they are both putting holes in the body that might leave a little pretty much not noticable scar. . .so why is one okay and not the other??

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#71 of 110 Old 07-11-2008, 11:08 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Individuation View Post
I'm also in one of the career centers of the world, so if it's fine with NYC employers I'm not going to cry into my beer that my child might not get hired at the Orange Julius in Terre Haute or something.

I mean, sure. Low-status and menial jobs (many of which I've had; I'm not making classist statements here, just being factual) do often dictate things about appearance; uniforms, hairstyle, etc. We'll all take our piercings out and wear the stupid smock if we're working at Walmart.

Somehow inferring from this that they are "unacceptable" is both strange and, I'd imagine, quite funny to the many middle-aged, conservative Indian women with nose piercings AND PhDs that I've run across.

Rather than worry about an innocuous piercing, why not raise your children with the skillset to enable them to write their own ticket? There seem to be some very low expectations on this thread.
I believe that the "low-status and menial jobs" would be what a typical teenager just entering the workforce would be doing. Beyond that and in a more professional position, DH is in finance/banking and there is no way he would be employable if he had facial piercing and/or visible tattoos. Some types of employment require a very conservative and professional appearance.



You seem very defensive about the opinions in my post but seem to have missed this part.

Quote:
I would definitely allow my child to pierce their nose.
Hell! I have blue hair. LOL
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#72 of 110 Old 07-12-2008, 03:41 AM
 
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I just wanted to add something: that at 13, kids are really into what everyone else has, and oftem one piercing leads to another.

I got my belly button, then my nose then my tongue and spent alot of money on the piercings, tattoo parlors and all the jewelry. So be prepared to pay through the nose- haha. I liked my jewelry to be 14k or match my clothes. But that's just me.

And for what it's worth, I miss my nose the most. And what to get it done again. Because like pp said some jobs don't like piercings. And I know I was turned down for jobs bc I had mine pierced. Although I usually worked at offices and the like( neat appearance required, with a lot of older people as clients)

I ended up taking mine out for another job and got lazy about putting it back in, because you have to twist it and everything into place. Unless you have a post, which in my opinion come out easily. Alas, I digress. Needless to say I was very into my body jewelry and ended up tossing my stash after all the holes were gone. Now the tattoos I have, a whole different story.

Aahh, to be 13. I would probably ask her to wait until she can pay for everything herself.
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#73 of 110 Old 07-12-2008, 03:46 AM
 
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I said no. It's her nose, and at that age she's ready to start making decisions like that. I would not let a 13 year-old get a tattoo, but that's permanent. A nose piercing closes up.
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#74 of 110 Old 07-12-2008, 06:08 AM
 
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This is tough. I said no and i'm not even happy with that, because as a few people have said before, it's only because of society and no one would care if it were her ears.

But, 13 is such a unique age. It's right at the point where a young women is trying to figure out who she is and what she wants in life and i known that for me, my interests in fashion and appearance changed drastically from when i was 13 to when i turned 14. Yes nose pearcings heal but not without a scar and even the tiniest of scars can make a girl (or woman for that matter) self conscious. So i would say wait one more year at least.

Oh, and I forgot, the reason why this is really tough is if you say no she might then go to some shady piercer that doesn't require ID. When i was 16 i wanted my navel pieced but my parents wouldn't let me so I had it done by this guy who pierced a friend of mine and he did it in his car with me laying down in the seat. Everything was sterilized and the needle was new (i saw him take it out of the package) and he had gloves on but when he went to put it through he didn't do it fast enough, and pushed it like 4 or 5 times. It felt like he was digging in my skin. I even started to cry. It was aweful and even though i cleaned it well every day, about 3 months later it ended up getting this huge blister and i had to take it out. The scar is really ugly...
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#75 of 110 Old 07-12-2008, 07:55 AM
 
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honestly? i think if she can take care of it why not. i had a friend in highschool who did it and she ended up taking it out b/c everyone kept thinking it was a pimple.. not to mention stuff kept sticking to it. lol
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#76 of 110 Old 07-12-2008, 08:04 AM
 
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I said no, but I guess that would depend on the circumstances. We have freinds who's DD wanted a nose piercing when she was fourteen. They told her to wait for a year and if she still wanted it they would pay for it and have it done at a salon of thier choice (so that they knew that it was reputable). She has since decided that she doesn't really want one after all. I guess my reaction would be similar.
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#77 of 110 Old 07-12-2008, 10:38 AM
 
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I'm curious about the advice against piercing guns. Is the advice the same for ears? When DD had her ears pierced (with a gun) we had so many problems.
Please explain. What type of piercing implement should I look for when having the side of her nose pierced?
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#78 of 110 Old 07-12-2008, 11:18 AM
 
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I said no, but I meant yes (I was answering the thread title instead of the poll question. I might not have been the only one to do that.)

Anyhow. . .it's her nose. Would you let her get her ears pierced? Is there a difference?
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#79 of 110 Old 07-12-2008, 12:08 PM
 
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Originally Posted by chiromamma View Post
I'm curious about the advice against piercing guns. Is the advice the same for ears? When DD had her ears pierced (with a gun) we had so many problems.
Please explain. What type of piercing implement should I look for when having the side of her nose pierced?
The piercer who pierced my nose told me that guns damage tissues (guns take a blunt object and force it through the skin, whereas piercers use a very sharp needle) when you use them and they are way more likely to get infected. Here's more info I found online about it.

http://tattoo.about.com/cs/psafety/a/piercing_guns.htm

http://www.expertvillage.com/video/1...l-piercing.htm

http://www.querycat.com/faq/90a97470...c456e3bfc80049

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#80 of 110 Old 07-12-2008, 01:39 PM
 
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i didn't read the other replies so maybe i'm repeating something. i put no, i think that 13 is too young, i wouldn't let my dd get it done at 13. not sure why i think that though. that being said i'm taking my 15 yo dd to get her nose pierced so i don't have objections to piercings ...

if she is responsible and will take care of the piercing (mine took close to a year to heal properly), then i might consider it.

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#81 of 110 Old 07-13-2008, 12:51 AM
 
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I had a nose piercing and let it close it, merely because I lost the ring (had to take it out for work) and I just decided that was okay. There was no scarring, no problems at all with it closing, and when I wore my small nose ring nobody really noticed the majority of the time.

That said, my mom did make me wait even though I wanted one for years. I don't know that I would necessarily wait until she was eighteen, but I would wait to see if it isn't just a passing fancy. I'd also discuss with her that it needs to heal properly, and that she may not be able to wear it in school or, later on, in most jobs. I'd probably get it done in the summer so it has time to heal and then be able to be taken out. Honestly I think I'd be more apprehensive about other piercing that might permenantly alter her appearance or take longer to heal.
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#82 of 110 Old 07-13-2008, 02:13 AM
 
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I dunno, 13 seems really really young to me for something like that. Maybe it's just me though.

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#83 of 110 Old 07-13-2008, 03:28 PM
 
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I said no because where I live it is against the law to do body piercing (i.e. other than ears) on anyone younger than 16 years of age. So anyone who would do it here would be breaking the law. That and I just feel 13 is a little young. She has her whole life to get a piercing if she chooses later...

That being said, it's up to you as the parent to judge if she is responsible enough to get a piercing. I just got my navel pierced and there is a LOT of care that goes into preventing infection. And infections can be really dangerous. You don't want to have to nag her about it.
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#84 of 110 Old 07-13-2008, 04:12 PM
 
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As a former piercer, my answer is no to the nose ring. In my experience, no reputable shop will pierce minors (hello 'penetration of a minor' charge... pass on that one).

(1) There can be permanent marks left behind in the form of keloid or hypertrophic scarring.

(2) I thoroughly disagree though that there is a lot of care that needs to take place, it's a small wound and your chances of infection are incredibly slim to none (unless your level of personal hygiene is WELL below average and you get pierced with a gun or something else that has not been sterilized in an autoclave). I cannot begin to count the number of noses I've pierced over the years and while I can certainly count the # of keloids I've seen, I've not seen one genuine infection.


As a parent I would be more worried about the chance of scarring than infection (which rates a 0 for me on the scale of worry). As a parent my answer would remain NO because no reputable shop would do it. DC would have to wait until whatever the age of consent is at whatever the cleanest shop in town is, period.

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#85 of 110 Old 07-13-2008, 04:28 PM
 
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I voted YES!!!! I had my eyebrow pierced at 14 and my first tattoo at 15 (both at reputable clean shops, with my mom's presence) and this was 11-12 years ago.

I would way rather my kid get a piercing, which can always be taken out when they sell out and join corporate america (oh the tears I would shed!) than do the things I did at 13 (lose virginity etc)
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#86 of 110 Old 07-13-2008, 04:45 PM
 
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I chose other!

I know several 13 YOs that are more than capable of 'getting' what they are doing and several that would be doing it for all the wrong reasons. I think it totally depends on the child.

I have no problem at all with the concept of a 13 YO getting any type of body modification that they want...as long as they have a true understanding of what they are doing.

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#87 of 110 Old 07-14-2008, 08:50 AM
 
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If you think she can take care of a nose piercing, then I'd say let her have it. In my opinion, it's not about how old she is (errr, it kind of is), but it's more about how mature she is. My almost-13 year old daughter could get a nose piercing any time under my rules because of her maturity level. So I find it more of a maturity level type thing, rather then age. (I voted other)
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#88 of 110 Old 07-15-2008, 03:40 AM
 
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I voted yes but I ment it to be a no! I think 13 is way too young, and i have nothing against nose peircings at all, but any sort of bodypeircings I am against untill 18. I think at 13 if they are alloud to do it, it was with your permission and same with the consequences. At 18 whatever you do to your body you are accountable for taking care of, and also conforming with guidlines for your chosen career. I convinced my aunt at 16 to let me get my belly button periced, which was super awsome when i was 16 but now that im 24 and its been out for years im regretting still having a little hole there. Especially now that Im pregnant. At 18 I dont know if I even would have had the balls to do it and go on my own, but at 16 with my aunt there to give permission and to hold my hand it was no bigdeal.

So I would say wait. She is so young now and has plenty of time to grow up. Most people with them are 18 and you dont wanting her looking prematurly older than she is. Give her somthing to look forward to. At 13 I was fianlly aloud to get my second ear peircing holes. And at 18 I made my own choices!

There were alot of things I liked and thought were cool while in highschool and younger but by 18,19,20 I realized that wasnt the image I wanted to give the world of myself. I would love to get my nose peirced and Im def. thinking of doing it... but Im 24..... Definitely give her somthing to look forward to.... because what will she want when she is 15 or 16 or 18?
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#89 of 110 Old 07-15-2008, 08:03 AM
 
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I think it's too young. I have a 13 yr old (boy) now and wouldn't allow it. But then again, he isn't the type that would want it.

At that young of an age things are done because of peer pressure and to be like other people. It's not done because it's something they have a huge inner desire to do. I was 13 once, I remember.

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#90 of 110 Old 07-15-2008, 08:07 AM
 
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Originally Posted by tbone_kneegrabber View Post
I would way rather my kid get a piercing, which can always be taken out when they sell out and join corporate america (oh the tears I would shed!) than do the things I did at 13 (lose virginity etc)
but a lot of children DO have sex very early on these days and getting a nose ring is one thing that can be done to attract other people to them.

You can't possibly think that because you willingly go with your child and allow them to get a piercing or tattoo while they are still a child that it will keep them from wanting to have sex early. Give me a break. I wanted nothing to do with tattoos and didn't even have my ears pierced when I started having sex at the age of 14. But then again, in the 80's only white trash did the piercings/tattoos where I came from. It's funny that all that mess is so widely accepted now. ick. I laugh sometimes at the thought of all the teens and kids in their 20's that will one day look back in ohhh about another twenty or thirty years and wonder why the h*ll did I do this to the one and only body I'll ever have.

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