How does your dh feel about the birth? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 14 Old 10-09-2007, 06:02 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I had to ask, because I am quite surprised by my dh's reaction!!

As you know, he caught our little surprise 3 minutes before the m/w arrived for the 2nd time , and he told me within a few hours afterwards that it touched him SO much he wished we had done it at home all along, AND he wants to do it again

Um, I don't know about THAT, but it is clear to me that he was incredibly moved by the whole thing.
(and thats saying alot because he is a man of few words even when there IS something to say *LOL*)

What about your dh?
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#2 of 14 Old 10-09-2007, 06:08 PM
 
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DH was a bit irritated that I demanded he get in the tub when I told him before hand that he didn't have to

My DH is also a man of few words, but he really seems overwhelmed by the whole thing... even two weeks later.

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#3 of 14 Old 10-09-2007, 06:22 PM
 
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My DH is a major factor in our decisions to continue homebirthing, our UC with DS#2 and the fact that all 3 of our kids have only been handled by a parent after birth. In an odd coincidence, he caught both the boys and I caught our girl.

He tells me often how thankful he is for the way we birth/parent. He considers himself to be a lucky man. He also was incredibly moved by the kids' births.
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#4 of 14 Old 10-09-2007, 08:30 PM
 
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Pretty moved by the whole thing...My best friend called to chat with him before she called me (she called home first bc she thought that we were) and he apparently GUSHED to her for over an hour about it and will barely chat with me about it....She told me a bit of what he said but I don't remember much of it but did tell me that he did go on and on and on.....

I just wish he did it with me.....bc I know he remembers things I don't right now....
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#5 of 14 Old 10-10-2007, 11:27 AM
 
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Mine was completely amazed by my VBAC..

This birth was quite different that my first. **My first I labored in the hospital for 16hrs, and it was all back labor, and draining for everyone. I completely dilated and pushed for 3hrs, before the c/s.

This time around, DH was w/ DS1, and finally was with me 3 hrs before the birth. He was thrilled/amazed at watching our son being born..

He keeps telling me "how amazing it was, and how proud he is of me".. I also overheard him telling my pg girlfriend that the birth was amazing, and how there is nothing greater than watching your child be born.. (my dh is also a man of a few words, but he'll chat your ear off if it's a subject he enjoys)
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#6 of 14 Old 10-10-2007, 01:00 PM
 
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Men are so funny. My dh says nothing to me about our births but apparently goes on and on to his co-workers. They knew all about our UC. He has been very moved by each birth. I have the greatest picture of him smiling and clapping when he finds out that Dahlia is a girl. He is really connected with all our children but he really changed after our UC with Eavan. It was just dh and I and he got six weeks off after the birth. It was a transformative experience for him. I wish he would talk to me more about it though.
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#7 of 14 Old 10-10-2007, 01:11 PM
 
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DH was in complete awe. He says it was 100X better than he was anticipating. The first time he drove by the hospital after the baby was born, he started to tear up because it was just such an emotional, overwhelmingly good experience.

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#8 of 14 Old 10-10-2007, 03:05 PM
 
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My DH is all for homebirthing after our experience. I don't know about a planned UC, I think he's still a bit tentative on that, but all the reluctancy he had in the beginning (mostly financial) was greatly outweighed by the quality of care we received adn are still receiving and the beautiful and undisturbed birth we had. Cheers!

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#9 of 14 Old 10-10-2007, 07:28 PM
 
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i think my DH was a little worried to see me in so much pain (as was my mom, she was actually crying). but besides that he was very supportive. my husband is pretty quiet so he didn't say a lot while i was in labor, just held my hand, rubbed my back, etc...which is what i needed. my mother on the otherhand would not shut up and i kind of wanted to hit her.

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#10 of 14 Old 10-11-2007, 07:34 PM
 
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He was a little disappointed actually since I kicked him out of the room and wanted to be alone with the doula. He understood though and accepted it, he just wished his father could have been there to help and support him (but he was in Mexico on a trip and didn't end up seeing the baby until she was over a week old).

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#11 of 14 Old 10-12-2007, 09:33 AM
 
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He said it was a lot harder to watch this time b/c I was in so much more pain and it lasted twice as long as the first time. He also said that there was a lot more of body fluids and stuff going on this time and that was difficult to deal with I have to agree, for some reason it seemed like everything was coming out of me the whole time. But he handled it well.
Other then that, he told me I did beautifully and he was so proud of me just like the first time.

And very much like y'alls dh's he's not a man of words so I only get what I specifically ask for!

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#12 of 14 Old 10-14-2007, 12:42 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maylea_moon View Post
i think my DH was a little worried to see me in so much pain (as was my mom, she was actually crying). but besides that he was very supportive. my husband is pretty quiet so he didn't say a lot while i was in labor, just held my hand, rubbed my back, etc...which is what i needed. my mother on the otherhand would not shut up and i kind of wanted to hit her.
yeah I don't know if i could ever have my mom at a birth. (she had me and my brothers ua naturelle back in the day the ...uh-hum *70's* ) But she is a little bit too paranoid over birth in her older age now 8sigh*
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#13 of 14 Old 10-15-2007, 02:06 PM
 
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My DH "caught" both kids in the birth pool.

It was definitely an awesome thing for him. With DS it was really great since we knew what we were doing and the labor was a much shorter, straight forward event.

We were both very happy that this labor was one were we were able to stay emotionally connected through the whole thing. I really needed DH to help me through it. I hung on him, hugged him, breathed with him. It wasn't until the last 30 minutes in transition that his help was not wanted (something about a MAN talking at that moment when you feel like you are ripping in half just doesn't work for me. I need a woman's voice at that time. )

DS came rocketing out after about 5 minutes of pushing into DH's hands. Then the placenta came out a contraction later with no PPH (like last time). Since DH was not deep in labor land he had had the time to get worried about a smooth placenta delivery. I only had about a second to turn my attention to it. We both beamed at each other and gave each other a very enthusiastic high five when my MW felt my uterus and announced it was already contracted down to a small size right after the placenta was out. It sounds corny but it might just be my favorite memory from the birth! (Well that and DD running down the hall naked to jump into the pool with us as DS was crowning.)

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#14 of 14 Old 10-16-2007, 12:12 AM
 
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My husband thought our homebirth totally rocked and is still in complete awe over the experience. I actually caught the baby because dh is only my head coach during labor and childbirth. He cannot handle seeing the dilated cervix and almost passed out when I pushed ds1 out. I love him right by my face reminding me to breath, etc. We work perfectly together. We are still processing the birth little by little each and every day and I'm really enjoying the process. Very magical! :

Susan~Mama to Atticus (2003), Creeley (2005), Townsyn (2007) and a fourth boy on the way in 2011!
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