How do you want this one to be better than the last? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 37 Old 07-13-2007, 11:07 AM - Thread Starter
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A trivial question really.

Sometimes I find myself thinking "maybe this one will be different..." mainly personality wise. For example, the only thing I really planned while I was pregnant with ds was giving into my childhood obcession with Sesame Street. I bought all the little Gund stuffed animal characters and had visions of "playing sesame street" with them. I would put the letter of the day on a cookie like cookie monster and we'd spend the day using th letter and the number of the day etc... Ds is just not into Sesame Street. Granted, he is just about old enough to start doing the stuff I envisioned but really, he's not interested. Maybe this one...... Ds doesn't really like my music much either. He really likes his dad's clssical music but usually asks to turn mine off in the car! He will, however, listen to Sesame Street CD's in the car and be happy. Strange twist.

Do you ever find yourself thinking these thought?
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#2 of 37 Old 07-13-2007, 11:13 AM
 
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My daughter doesn't like me to sing. She says, "stop singing." It's one of her first sentences.
I hope the new baby will like to hear his mama sing to him. I sure loved hearing mine (and still do).
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#3 of 37 Old 07-13-2007, 11:25 AM
 
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i hope that she likes books. i really wanted my daughter to love books, and we even had a book themed 1st birthday party. but she hates them and won't sit still for 2 seconds to even look at the pictures.

Christine, mom to C(7.5) - E(5) - J(3) - B(10 mos)

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#4 of 37 Old 07-13-2007, 11:27 AM
 
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I hope this child will eat once it is time! My two year old will eat nothing at all!! It is so stressful.
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#5 of 37 Old 07-13-2007, 11:29 AM
 
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I really, really, really, really hope this one sleeps.

Amen.

Suz, mommy to 2 chess-playing, lightsaber-wielding boys

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#6 of 37 Old 07-13-2007, 11:58 AM
 
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I just really hope she's a much mellower baby than my second. He cried so much and I had such severe post partum depression. I am actually in therapy so he can watch me for signs of it. I don't want to do that again!
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#7 of 37 Old 07-13-2007, 12:02 PM
 
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Originally Posted by bygones75 View Post
I really, really, really, really hope this one sleeps.

Amen.
:

And it would be kinda nice to have one kid who looks a little like me. DD looks so much like dh that if she were a boy I am sure people would wonder if we had cloned him!

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#8 of 37 Old 07-13-2007, 12:27 PM
 
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I hope this one is not quite as daredevily as DS...I don't know if my heart will withstand two trying out scary things.
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#9 of 37 Old 07-13-2007, 01:10 PM
 
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Honestly I'd love another little Liam -- which is not really fair to this one who is of course his very own person

I will admit that sleeping through the night before 2.5 years old would be nice, and naps longer than 20-40 minutes for the first year...
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#10 of 37 Old 07-13-2007, 01:20 PM - Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by thorn View Post
i hope that she likes books. i really wanted my daughter to love books, and we even had a book themed 1st birthday party. but she hates them and won't sit still for 2 seconds to even look at the pictures.

It took ds 2 years to start to like books. Now he LOVES them. Don't give up hope!
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#11 of 37 Old 07-13-2007, 01:55 PM
 
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Originally Posted by jmthompson View Post
I hope this one is not quite as daredevily as DS...I don't know if my heart will withstand two trying out scary things.
same here, but other than that, i'm hoping this one ISN'T too different from DS1, because he's really such an amazingly well-rounded, easygoing, bright kid... : i'm a lucky mommy

i've been focussing more on how i hope this one's birth is different from the last one
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#12 of 37 Old 07-13-2007, 02:09 PM
 
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I would pretty pretty please like to have a child who sleeps thru the night when we leave the hospital. I would also like to politely request for my baby to have a mild temper and a little voice. I would love for him to be born knowing how to play and share and eat well and be potty trained pretty much as soon as he can crawl.


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#13 of 37 Old 07-13-2007, 02:23 PM
 
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i don't have a child to compare this one to but i really hope this little ones enjoys playing in the mud and climbing trees, i have spent so much time day dreaming about playing in the mud and climbing trees with this one. i want a muddy little monkey i guess. also i hope this little one will like to hear me sing and will enjoy books. we have a house full of books and they are such a big part of my partners and my life. we go to the library once a week and buy books on a regular basis and we are very musical people with singing and musical instruments and all of that.

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#14 of 37 Old 07-13-2007, 02:45 PM
 
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I would pretty pretty please like to have a child who sleeps thru the night when we leave the hospital. I would also like to politely request for my baby to have a mild temper and a little voice. I would love for him to be born knowing how to play and share and eat well and be potty trained pretty much as soon as he can crawl.


:
That sounds nice. I'll put in an order for one of those too!

Suz, mommy to 2 chess-playing, lightsaber-wielding boys

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#15 of 37 Old 07-13-2007, 04:30 PM
 
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Originally Posted by stacey2061 View Post

i've been focussing more on how i hope this one's birth is different from the last one
Yeah, I thought that was what the thread was going to be about

In many ways, I'm afraid to have a child who is different from my 1st, because he's pretty amazing. I have to keep an open mind and try not to compare or expect the same from this one, just let him be who he is.
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#16 of 37 Old 07-13-2007, 05:21 PM
 
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Love my DD's spirited personality...just hoping next baby will sleep through the night earlier and be a bit less picky about eating!
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#17 of 37 Old 07-13-2007, 07:31 PM
 
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I would love for DS #2 to be like DS #1 without the milk allergy because I like milk and cheese I'm wishing for a different birth mostly!
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#18 of 37 Old 07-13-2007, 11:29 PM
 
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yes, yes, yes. I would love to have a child that is mellow, loves veggies, does what I tell her, and that I can put down once she's asleep. I'm not holding my breath. Because that would be pretty much the opposite of this one!

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#19 of 37 Old 07-13-2007, 11:50 PM
 
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Actually, as long as it sleeps as well as Max did as an infant (note, not as a toddler, as an infant because he slept well. Not long, but soundly, restfully), not as cry-ey and clingy as Rachel was (that was so very hard for us all but we've really come a long way since then) and is as smiley and cute as both of them.

I like that my kids are funny, they laugh a lot, they love a lot, they're happy! So I would like that for this one, also.

And, honestly, I hope there aren't any developmental disorders. It's very hard having a child w/ ASD, no matter what degree of "functioning" he has. I'd really like to be able to continue giving him what he needs w/o having to divide that part of my attention between 2. I may post about this in the SN forum. Probably some of the other moms there get what I'm saying. (I feel really jerky for even thinking that about my kids.)

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#20 of 37 Old 07-14-2007, 12:11 AM
 
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And, honestly, I hope there aren't any developmental disorders. It's very hard having a child w/ ASD, no matter what degree of "functioning" he has. I'd really like to be able to continue giving him what he needs w/o having to divide that part of my attention between 2. I may post about this in the SN forum. Probably some of the other moms there get what I'm saying. (I feel really jerky for even thinking that about my kids.)
I don't think wishing for a healthy child is jerky in the least. What I hear you saying is that you want to have the energy to give all of your children what they need, and you are not sure you will be able to do that as well if this baby has a developmental disorder as well. I think that is a very normal, understandable emotion, and not - repeat not - jerky!

Dh has add, which is on the very mild end of the autism spectrum, and even that can be a real challenge sometimes. I can kinda imagine what it would be like to have a child with this going on, and I can certainly empathize with what you are saying, though, since I am not in your shoes, of course I won't be able to entirely "get" it.

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#21 of 37 Old 07-14-2007, 12:31 AM
 
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What Dena said
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#22 of 37 Old 07-14-2007, 12:46 AM
 
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I don't think wishing for a healthy child is jerky in the least. What I hear you saying is that you want to have the energy to give all of your children what they need, and you are not sure you will be able to do that as well if this baby has a developmental disorder as well. I think that is a very normal, understandable emotion, and not - repeat not - jerky!

Dh has add, which is on the very mild end of the autism spectrum, and even that can be a real challenge sometimes. I can kinda imagine what it would be like to have a child with this going on, and I can certainly empathize with what you are saying, though, since I am not in your shoes, of course I won't be able to entirely "get" it.
Dena, thank you. You're exactly right. Thank you. :

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#23 of 37 Old 07-14-2007, 01:50 AM
 
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I just hope that my next baby won't have reflux.
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#24 of 37 Old 07-14-2007, 02:17 AM
 
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I just hope that my next baby won't have reflux.
Yes, dd had a mild(thankfully) problem with that. I could do with out the constant stream of regurgitated milk that dd had coming out her mouth for the first 8 months of her life...

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#25 of 37 Old 07-14-2007, 02:19 AM
 
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I just hope that my next baby won't have reflux.
Oh, jeez, yes. Rachel had colic (not much reflux but she was definitely miserable!) and I SO hope this kid doesn't.

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#26 of 37 Old 07-14-2007, 07:59 AM
 
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Another wild child is expected but I'd love for this Babe to be a good sleeper. I've never had one. What are they like???

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#27 of 37 Old 07-14-2007, 11:58 AM
 
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I just really hope she's a much mellower baby than my second. He cried so much and I had such severe post partum depression. I am actually in therapy so he can watch me for signs of it. I don't want to do that again!
You said it. Last child, I literally had a nervous breakdown and couldn't take care of her or myself. It was so awful, I hope I never go through that again. I think it was mainly situational though ( I was in process of divorcing her father). This time I am happily married and hoping for the best.
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#28 of 37 Old 07-14-2007, 01:26 PM
 
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You said it. Last child, I literally had a nervous breakdown and couldn't take care of her or myself. It was so awful, I hope I never go through that again. I think it was mainly situational though ( I was in process of divorcing her father). This time I am happily married and hoping for the best.
Situational sucks because everyone is so stressed out! I think that's part of why dd was such a crier. I had PPD and dh was no more use than a bump on a log. : : He is so much better this time around! (Finally! )

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#29 of 37 Old 07-14-2007, 11:37 PM
 
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Yes, dd had a mild(thankfully) problem with that. I could do with out the constant stream of regurgitated milk that dd had coming out her mouth for the first 8 months of her life...
Did they check for a milk protein allergy first? DS was diagnosed with reflux by two different doctors without doing a scope. It turned out all along it was caused by milk allergy through breast milk. Once I stopped drinking milk or eating milk products it totally went away.
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#30 of 37 Old 07-15-2007, 12:16 AM
 
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Well for the birth, I hope to be more calm and more patient than I was with dd's birth.

For the kid herself, I just hope we can both get the hang of nursing quickly. I am a BFAR mom (breastfeeding after a reduction). Anyway, because of my last 3 kids (I stopped with everyone before 1 month old) I just don't have a lot of CONFIDENCE in my bfing ability. I'm going to DO it, but I feel like a first time mom.

So wish me lots of good nursing vibes there.

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