Sex after birth poll - Mothering Forums

View Poll Results: Have you had sex since the baby?
1 week after 1 2.86%
2 weeks after 3 8.57%
3 week after 3 8.57%
4 weeks after 0 0%
5 weeks after 6 17.14%
right at 6 weeks 4 11.43%
after 6 weeks 5 14.29%
Keep that thing away from me! 13 37.14%
Voters: 35. You may not vote on this poll

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#1 of 21 Old 11-05-2007, 02:17 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I felt better a lot sooner with this birth than I did with dd #1 and we were back in the saddle this time after 3 weeks compared to the 3 months the first time around. I do have a lot more help this time since we live so close to family and dh has been a lot more active with the girls. I feel much more rested and there is something about dh taking care of all of us that is a turn on for me. Anyone else want to share?

:,,:, to my three veggie ladies 12/09/05, : 10/03/07 & 07/10/09 hanging on for dear life to :
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#2 of 21 Old 11-05-2007, 02:26 PM
 
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Yes, this time was easier, and I was emotionally ready much sooner. Though my tear isn't entirely healed (not sure why... MW says to do more kegels.) I was exhausted and overwhelmed after Thomas was born, and the fact that DH pushed for sex made it worse. He learned his lesson. Since James's birth, he's been very helpful with both kids, and not pushy at all. I think that's why I was ready at 5 weeks instead of 3 months!

Suz, mommy to 2 chess-playing, lightsaber-wielding boys

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#3 of 21 Old 11-05-2007, 03:13 PM
 
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TMI I know...but we are going to try tonight at 2 1/2 weeks. I have a feeling it might be too soon and if it hurts at all I will stop but I REALLY want it! (I told you too much info Anyhow, it really hurt the first few times after my second c-section so I am scared that this time it will too. Wish me luck.....
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#4 of 21 Old 11-05-2007, 05:32 PM
 
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I was worried this time, too, because I had tearing last time and inexplicable pain on top of that. With virtually no tearing with this birth, though, it turned out I had little to worry about. I was definitely ready on some levels much sooner than I was ready to get over the fear! So, in the end, it was 5wks with no real problems.

HeatherB ~ mama to 3 wonderful boys:  reading.gif 03/02; modifiedartist.gif09/04; sleepytime.gif 09/07 - and Eliana, babygirl.gif 11/13/10!  
Founder of Houston Birth Alternatives: Be Informed, Encouraged, Supported birth support group and aspiring midwife.

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#5 of 21 Old 11-05-2007, 06:52 PM
 
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definitely NOT ready yet at 2 weeks, lol

Christine, mom to C(7.5) - E(5) - J(3) - B(10 mos)

Doula, childbirth educator, Co-leader of ICAN of Atlanta

 

"Never miss an opportunity to make others happy, even if you have to leave them alone in order to do it." ~Anonymous

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#6 of 21 Old 11-05-2007, 08:13 PM
 
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I'm 3 1/2 weeks out and we haven't yet..I see my OB two weeks from today. We were planning on trying then. Any reason to wait that long? I did have a c-section if that makes a difference.

Stacey reading.gif Happy wife to Rick coolshine.gif ,homeschooling Mama to Jacob, Noel, Joanna jumpers.gif  and a sweet stork-girl.gif due in the Spring!
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#7 of 21 Old 11-05-2007, 08:31 PM
 
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Im gonna give y'all TMI here, so read at your own risk.

















My DH always compliments me about how well I seem to tighten back up after giving birth. But last time, in 2005, he only waited 3 weeks after my birth and complained about it. (He didn't say it was like throwin a hot dog down a hallway, but he might as well have. I figured, served him right not waiting 6 weeks after, what did he expect when I gave birth 3 weeks prior??). He waited till 6 weeks, and was very pleased

Moral of the story: wait till you're tight enough if you don't want em complaining about it!!
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#8 of 21 Old 11-05-2007, 08:56 PM
 
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I was ready (physically and emotionally) for sex at about 3 weeks postpartum but it was two more weeks before the bleeding slowed enough (spotting) where we were desperate enough to not wait any longer.

Kristina in Kitsap County, WA
Doula, Student Midwife, Mama, Wife & More
http://redspiral.blogspot.com
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#9 of 21 Old 11-05-2007, 09:06 PM
 
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We did it once at 2.5w and then again at 3w. I felt fine. Not turned on in any way (tmi!) but fine.

Last time we waited 2w and it was fine.

treehugger.gif Erika
mom of twins.gif (8)  blahblah.gif(5) thumbsuck.gif (3) and baby.gif born at home on Christmas day! 
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#10 of 21 Old 11-05-2007, 10:05 PM
 
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nothing happening here though the DH is hinting big time.
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#11 of 21 Old 11-06-2007, 03:44 AM
 
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Wow! You all amaze me. That's all I have to say.
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#12 of 21 Old 11-06-2007, 04:09 AM
 
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3 weeks for me but I had a c-section with my last so my vagina was in good working order. lol

I had sex about 5 weeks after my vaginal birth and it HURT for like a month!
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#13 of 21 Old 11-07-2007, 01:41 AM
 
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Honestly, my poor husband didn't get laid a lot durring our pregnancy this time and we just recently got back in the saddle (terrible expression, i know). It was around 6 weeks post when we first had sex again, then just this weekend. Since I had a VBAC it was interesting for me, I'm still a bit unsure of what I'm feeling. I had a 2nd degree tear and stitches that are all out, but I still feel like things are pulling during the actual act. I don't know what it is, but It does feel a bit more uncomfortable for me.

Also, having a 3 year old and a 2 month old and a family bed...anyone have suggestions for keeping the romance? The last time it only worked because the 3 year old spent the night at Grandma's. MOst of the time they don't nap together and usually not nap at all when dad gets home in the evening. Plus my husband gets up early for work and I stay up late with the kids. We still love each other very much, but we could use some pointers to keep our romance lively!
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#14 of 21 Old 11-07-2007, 04:05 AM
 
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Well both this time and in 2005 DP and I didn't make it three weeks. I remember last time at the follow up the other midwife asked in a "you haven't had sex yet, right" kind of way... our looks and silence answered and she simply warned me that we ought to get protection she has two children 11 months apart EBF... ended up it took me 1.5 years to get my cycles back

So this time our MW didn't ask, and pregnancy isn't so much of a concern for us right away...

TMI here but is PP sex like as amazing for anyone else?!?!? I mean wow, I've only been that way TWICE in my life.

orngbiggrin.gif mom of three with stork-suprise.gif on the way

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#15 of 21 Old 11-08-2007, 11:36 PM
 
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My DH want nothing to do with DTD. He is totally freaked about having more babies...I have to wait until he sees a doc and gets fixed. Get on with it man!!!
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#16 of 21 Old 11-09-2007, 01:44 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by motherearthdancer View Post
Also, having a 3 year old and a 2 month old and a family bed...anyone have suggestions for keeping the romance? The last time it only worked because the 3 year old spent the night at Grandma's. MOst of the time they don't nap together and usually not nap at all when dad gets home in the evening. Plus my husband gets up early for work and I stay up late with the kids. We still love each other very much, but we could use some pointers to keep our romance lively!

I'd like to know if anyone has any advice for this too. I have a two year old and the newborn sleeping with me...dh moved to the other room. He gets up at 4am and usually the babes and I stay up later and sleep in 2 year old won't nap anymore.....plus dh is working weekends and yeah poor guy may never see it

To the OP I don't know when I'll be ready I am going on 3 weeks and I had no tears or anything, but I am not in a big hurry yet. It will be sooner then my first son....I had lots of stitiches and it hurt for along time. No tearing or anything this time....just a "skid mark" as my midwife said....yay for waterbirths!!
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#17 of 21 Old 11-09-2007, 09:30 PM
 
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It's only been 4 weeks (to the day!) but we're going to wait until 6 weeks exactly just to be safe. I'm sure I'm fine now... and dh can't wait (he's counting the days)! I don't think I've seen him like this since we first started dating!
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#18 of 21 Old 11-09-2007, 10:35 PM
 
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I am 3.5 weeks PP and no DTD here. I am still bleeding bright red, and have pain. Not to mention I tore REALLY badly. The OB said he couldn't even count the stitches. I think it was 4th degree. I didn't know that there were "4 degrees," but I think he said my cervix tore? I thought I heard that in my PP high! I had some tears going off the main tear too. It hurts like hell, but NOTHING compared to the csection!! woo hoo for VBAC!

Anyway, so no DTD here. I really want to. I feel like a woman now! I guess the vag birth helped that!
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#19 of 21 Old 11-10-2007, 02:07 AM - Thread Starter
 
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We have a family bed, so now we only have a small window of time in the afternoon while they both nap and around 11pm, before anyone wakes up to nurse/go potty. Last time around, I bled for 10 weeks do to some tearing and this time it stopped completely at about 4 weeks, so that made it more desirable. This time around, I didn't break my tailbone and I have more help now that we live minutes away from my parents and in-laws.

:,,:, to my three veggie ladies 12/09/05, : 10/03/07 & 07/10/09 hanging on for dear life to :
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#20 of 21 Old 11-10-2007, 11:03 AM
 
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To keep the romance alive...

we "christened" other rooms in our house. Sex in our own bed was/is a rare thing. Even if we dont currently have a baby in our bed, it's too close to the kids rooms and we dont want to risk waking them. Our second oldest is a particularly light sleeper.

Most often, we made love downstairs in the tv room, we got a space heater and candles and made a little love nest. That's where Jackson was conceived.
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#21 of 21 Old 11-10-2007, 01:43 PM
 
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OMG Frelle~~ """A hotdog down a hallway!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"""
That is the funniest freakin thing I've heard in days !!!!!


Yep, we're at 17 days post partum and I'm thinking maybe we'll try in another week or so... I did tear and had 3 stitches but they feel great so.... this pp period has been faaaar easier than my others. Geez... I still have to post my birth story...

natural birthin', baby catchin', cloth addicted, intactalactavist mama of 12/00, 6/03, 10/07, 8/10 & our angelcubs three
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