Not liking DH very much.... - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 8 Old 11-21-2007, 09:46 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I am warning you now that this is a vent. I just need to get a few things off my chest for therapy.

I am not liking DH very much right now. DD2 is now 4.5wks old. The last two weeks have gone drastically downhill. She started in with the grunting when I would lay her down, and now starting at about 4pm, she starts screaming and that goes off an on until 2-3am. I have not been to sleep in my bed for several days. I sleep on the couch so that DD2 can scream her head off and not wake up the 2yo. So this means DH gets a good 8+ hrs of sleep a night. I average about 3. DD2 cannot fall asleep unless she is on my chest, which means I sleep semi sitting up. I am so exhausted.

I think DD2 has reflux. DH thinks the best way to handle her screaming is to just put her down and let her CIO. I told him A) I CANNOT SLEEP knowing that she is in pain and scared. And B) by "letting her CIO" she just gets herself worked up so that calming her is that much more difficult.

He almost flat out refuses to watch the girls long enough for me to take a nap, and I don't even want him watching them because I know he will make DD2 CIO. So I am all alone in this hell I call a life. Someone please tell me it will end soon...

I did get some Colic Ease Gripe Water today and have given DD2 her first dose and am about to give another. I hope the stuff works!
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#2 of 8 Old 11-21-2007, 09:56 PM
 
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chiropractor, too. sounds like tummy trouble.

may I bean your dh in the head? :

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#3 of 8 Old 11-21-2007, 11:32 PM
 
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Oh, honey. I am so sorry. That just sucks.

I second the chiro suggestion. And the beaning dh in the head suggestion.

Also, Hylands makes awesome colic tablets - you can dissolve them in water or breastmilk and give them to your dd in a dropper - that really saved us with dd1. We would give them to her and literally five minutes later all the gas and poop would come out. Amazing.

Is there anyone you can call for respite? Could you hire someone? I wish we lived closer, I would come take the kids for a couple of hours so you could sleep.

(((Hugs))) I hope things get better soon.

Wife to Thomas, WAH mama to Sofia Rose 8/04, Ellen Marie 10/07, her twin sister Amalie Joy lost 7/07 , and Maya Grace and Hannah Miriam 4/10
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#4 of 8 Old 11-22-2007, 01:50 AM
 
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Good for you standing up for your poor baby! You deserve a break and I wish I lived close to help. I took diary out of my diet and that helped the "reflux" a lot and then when I started block nursing it help tremendously! I mean I have a totally different baby than when I was switching sides. Let your baby nurse off just one side 4 times or more then when you switch sides and let down spray into a towel and relatch after your milk has gone to a drip. This is what I've done and we are all so much happier.
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#5 of 8 Old 11-23-2007, 12:44 AM
 
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It does end. But in the meantime,

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#6 of 8 Old 11-23-2007, 02:35 AM
 
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no advice just
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#7 of 8 Old 11-23-2007, 08:54 AM
 
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I'm sorry, hon. I want to throw James's dirty diaper at your husband right now.

All the advice is good, particularly for the overactive letdown. James was the same way with the grunting. He's almost 10 weeks now and it's MUCH better. Hang in there.

Suz, mommy to 2 chess-playing, lightsaber-wielding boys

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#8 of 8 Old 11-23-2007, 03:24 PM
 
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Not in your DDC, sorry!

I went through this with DS2 when he was newborn 9 years ago (with my ex husband). I was averaging 2-3 hours of sleep and he was crying/screaming nearly 12-16 hours a day, waking every hour in excruciating belly pain.

He ended up on Propulsid (no longer used on babies) and that helped a bit to settle his tummy and get him to take more at one sitting and poop less.

Anywhoo, the health problem is different I assume, but the husband was absolutely worthless in helping out and I was in total hell. I just wanted you to know I've been there, I lived through it, and my son has always been a pretty cheery kid despite his beginnings.

The major crying finally ended and he was able to sleep longer. His problems went on for quite a while, but at least he wasn't in as much pain or sleep deprived. I think this not only sleep deprives you, but it sleep deprives the baby too! No deep sleep to heal, you know?

Good luck, mama!!

Almost a b-ball team: : Taylor -14, Alex -11, Jack -8, Lachlan born at home 11/15/07
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