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I used to become a bit indignant that the whole birth thing was about the woman. "Hey, it's my baby too, I'm on a journey, surely there's more to this than 'just' being there for her?!"
After 3 births of our own, facilitating men's birth prep classes, and Birthing From Within mentor training, I've dropped that act and do fully believe that delivery is and should be about the mama. She is going through an epic journey - ours began before it and will continue after it, but labour is not our moment.
Our partner needs to feel safe in order to summon and trust the innate power that all women have to give birth. She needs to feel that her partner is guarding the entrance to the cave -warding off beasts and dangers and MIL's, nurses and unnecessary interventions, noises and cold drafts and anything else that can pull her away from her center of power.
Practically that takes many different forms, but the core approach is to remain aware that it is our moment to be fully in our 'masculine' so that she can be fully in her 'feminine' power. Out of that awareness, the things to do will more or less flow naturally.
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