Join Date: May 2004
Location: Dayton, Oh
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Originally Posted by Mrs_Hos
I'm cross posting this in I'm Pregnant as well.
First, let me start by saying that we have EXTREMELY thin walls in our townhomes. I can hear neighbors clanging their wine glasses (almost)--well I can ALWAYS tell what TV channel they are watching. We all know to keep our voices down while arguing since we don't necessarily want everyone to know what our personal business is.
Having said all that...I just 'witnessed' an argument with my dear neighbors.
She is pregnant (as am I) and in those early months when she is sick all the time...and she is still working full time--extremely tired etc.
He works full time and I am sure he is doing his best to 'help' her. They were arguing pretty loudly (ok, SHOUTING) and I'm sure they (or she) will be over here soon to talk or appologize for yelling etc. I'm wondering how to help her.
The reason I am asking DADs...is I would like insight to the male mind when your wife is pg for the 1st time. I know that my dear friend is upset that he doesn't care, because he isn't helping her enough or letting her feel loved etc--he isn't returning her many calls during the day etc. This is what I think of as pretty common new pg stuff...she feels sick, is overworked/overtired, thinks she is doing this whole 'baby thing' all by herself...all in all, her feelings are hurt.
He on the other hand is probably doing what he normally would, but with her pg hormones he is probably thinking this is PMSx10! (or x100!!)
Anyways. I don't want to be a medling neighbor...I know she will talk to me about it...so, what do I say...what do men feel like with baby #1? My hubby was deployed during the beginning of my 1st pg--and now we've been married a long time and so he just 'knows' how to deal with me or love me to 'calm me down' when stressed...but I'm not sure his ways would help them...
Thanks for any help!!!!!
|OH boy. My dh and I had this problem a bunch with #1. He felt like I was just way tooooo sensitive and I felt like he was a stupid jerk face. And that was about as grown up as I could be about it. We fought a lot and nothing he could do was good enough.
Looking back now, I think it was me being super touchy. But there was nothing I could have done to fix it or be less so.
ANd he really wasn't mr. lovey dovey, which I needed. He just didn't know how to deal with the pg me.