Here's what works for me:Attention. Gentle attention.
When I come in from work, a hug, a kiss, a bright smile, "I'm so glad your home." Don't gush, but be genuine. Don't tell me about the sink clogging up, the mini-blinds that crashed to the floor, the ceiling fan that sparks when you pull the cord or how the kids spooned ice cream into the computer. If you want me to think romance, appreciation, love, then don't hit me with problems when I walk through the door. (If the problem is serious enough for that, I'd presume you've called the appropriate people to fix it. And if I'm "The Appropriate People", then tonight isn't a love/appreciation/romance night.)Dress up. Inside and out.
You don't have to be wearing a formal evening gown, but a nice skirt/top or dress would be appreciated. Run a brush through your hair, brush your teeth and put on a little of that fu-fu water I like.
Skip the makeup. That stuff looks awful and tastes worse. (And let's face it, if you're going for romance, at some point my lips--and perhaps my tongue--are going to be on your face. *blech* Makeup is awful
Oh, and don't forget the unders, hosiery and shoes. These may seem extraneous, but they can be key to making "the look" that changes you from "frumpy house frau" to "gorgeous love pet". My personal tastes aren't really important here--but learn what your SO's tastes are. (I like heels, stockings and "butt floss"--if anything there at all--with a non-nursing bra
. I suspect I'm not terribly different than most, but check it out with him, to be sure.)Aggression. Eagerness. Vocality.
If you're going to this much effort, then push it through to the end. While we're kissing, unbutton my shirt a bit. Give me a sly grin that says you intend a lot more
. When I make an action, respond
to it. Help me along. Show me what you like. TELL
me what you like. Vocally express that you like it (we're talking without words, here, if you catch my completely non-subtle
Most men (or at least the ones I'm (un)fortunate enough to be friends with) want their wives/girlfriends to take complete charge. They want to be "putty" in the ladies' hands. I'm a little different in that I want to be just as agressive (if not moreso), but I definitely
want that to be mirrored and reciprocated by my ladylove.
Bottom line: think about how you like to be treated and treat him in much the same way. If you like it when he focuses his attention on you, dresses up nicely for you, wears his cologne, doesn't hit you with the troubles of the day, then slowly undresses you and is aggressive with you... well why wouldn't he want that same response from you?