postpartum good times, TMI - Mothering Forums

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Old 01-26-2008, 03:16 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I did mention TMI, right?
Anyway, last night I decided it must be against the Geneva Convention to make anyone (like, um, me) go longer than four weeks without getting it on. I had practically forgotten how it worked. It was pretty good fun, even including the moment where I got into it and accidentally sprayed milk all over Aaron. I was pretty swollen afterwards, but at least I wasn't about to explode anymore.
So how's resuming the conjugal visits going for y'all?

Jen, journalist, policy wonk, and formerly a proud single mama to my sweet little man Cyrus, born at home Dec. 2007 . Now married to my Incredibly Nice Guy and new mama to baby Arthur.
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Old 01-26-2008, 03:23 PM
 
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the first time was not so good, 'cause i tore like a mofo all the way to my rectum, and where my stitches had been STUNG. but the second time was good. we haven't had a third time yet because i am terrified of how a condom will feel, and i'm not gonna trust LAM to keep me from getting pregnant because a bunch of women in my family got pregnant within a couple months of their children's births... despite excl BFing on demand, no pacifier use, and whatever other stuff makes you 98% protected according to LAM. so i am afraid of genetically being in that 2%.

the hubby keeps saying we can TRY with the condom and if it feels awful we can always stop, but i are a-scared.

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Old 01-26-2008, 04:15 PM
 
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I need a short and cute acronym for "typing one-handed while baby sucks on my finger because he refuses to use the boob to comfort suck and we haven't gotten frustrated enough to try a pacifier yet," but I suppose that's a topic for another time...

Anyway, our first time was at 4wks pp, too, Jen. And we dtd again at about 5wks pp (that would be yesterday am if you're trying to do the math ) Both times were pretty wonderful. Then again, I just had a couple skid marks, no tearing and no stitches.

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Originally Posted by MmeMuffin View Post
we haven't had a third time yet because i am terrified of how a condom will feel, and i'm not gonna trust LAM to keep me from getting pregnant because a bunch of women in my family got pregnant within a couple months of their children's births... despite excl BFing on demand, no pacifier use, and whatever other stuff makes you 98% protected according to LAM. so i am afraid of genetically being in that 2%.
: Thanks for typing that out, Muffin, so now I don't have to. A friend did a reading on me while I was in my first trimester and predicted we would have irish twins : I'm not so down with that, so we used the good ole pull & pray the first two times and I can't bring myself to walk into the drug store with Calvin in the pouch and buy a box of condoms We have a few left since we were technically TTA when ds was conceived, but I think they may have expired by now :

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Old 01-26-2008, 06:12 PM
 
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Crap! I have no clue how old the condoms we're using are- at least a year and half. Whoops. Thanks for reminding me they expire, Steph.

We've dtd 3 times, mostly because I had erratic pp bleeding and what may have been my first pp period (grumblegrumble, grrrgrrr). And the birth control thing is freaking me out because I have no clue what to use. And as much as I love Reese, I don't want another one right away, ya know? So my libido is too busy going *OMG NO MORE BABIES* to be into getting it on.
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Old 01-26-2008, 07:16 PM
 
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yeah, I am so not into it. I'm too busy worrying about the kids and what has to be done around the house, and oh yeah, BIRTH CONTROL, because no way am I getting pregnant anytime soon !

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Old 01-26-2008, 07:17 PM
 
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hbak - holding baby at keyboard - is the acronym i'm using ever since that "perpetually nak" thread. at least in my head. i know happyfox uses it.

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I can't bring myself to walk into the drug store with Calvin in the pouch and buy a box of condoms We have a few left since we were technically TTA when ds was conceived, but I think they may have expired by now :
crap. i didn't think to check for that either. we were TTA as well, so i should check on those condoms...

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So my libido is too busy going *OMG NO MORE BABIES* to be into getting it on.
lol, here too. poor alex. he's like "booty?" and i'm like "augh babies!!!!"

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Old 01-26-2008, 07:21 PM
 
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We've been successful twice and failed twice. I want to but it STINGS!

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despite excl BFing on demand, no pacifier use, and whatever other stuff makes you 98% protected according to LAM. so i am afraid of genetically being in that 2%.
I'd love to use LAM but I had fertile cervical mucus this week, today is my first dry day.

And if it make you feel better according to the directions in the box of condoms we just bought condoms are only 1% more effective than the withdrawl method. :

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Old 01-26-2008, 07:38 PM - Thread Starter
 
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A friend did a reading on me while I was in my first trimester and predicted we would have irish twins :
I just explained to Aaron what Irish twins were and why I didn't want them. I was feeling cranky a couple of days ago, and sternly told myself that I wasn't allowed to be premenstrual at four weeks pp.

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I'm not so down with that, so we used the good ole pull & pray the first two times and I can't bring myself to walk into the drug store with Calvin in the pouch and buy a box of condoms
Yeah, Cyrus owes his life to the pull and pray method. Not that I'm complaining. I bought condoms and KY with the babe in the sling and felt a bit naughty for it.
I'm getting an IUD in the next few weeks. We know we want another baby in two or three years, but I'd prefer if the pregnancy was planned and in wedlock and all that.

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Old 01-26-2008, 08:19 PM
 
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We've been successful twice and failed twice. I want to but it STINGS!

I'd love to use LAM but I had fertile cervical mucus this week, today is my first dry day.
stings here too!!! : and i had some cervical mucus that wasn't very fertile, but by FAM rules would mean abstaining... so i don't know. my period better not come back any time soon. i hear if your baby sleeps for longer stretches w/o feeding, it comes back sooner, and maya decided to not eat between 3:30 and 10:30 y'day morning, so i'm screwed. she usually goes for at least one 4.5-6 hour stretch at night, if not two.

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I just explained to Aaron what Irish twins were and why I didn't want them. I was feeling cranky a couple of days ago, and sternly told myself that I wasn't allowed to be premenstrual at four weeks pp.

Yeah, Cyrus owes his life to the pull and pray method. Not that I'm complaining. I bought condoms and KY with the babe in the sling and felt a bit naughty for it.

I'm getting an IUD in the next few weeks. We know we want another baby in two or three years, but I'd prefer if the pregnancy was planned and in wedlock and all that.
i am much less cranky when i'm getting laid, that's for sure. oh well. we'd do it right now if the baby didn't insist on being worn. and that's definitely NOT hot.

maya owes her life to my fertility issues. between feb 06 and feb 07, my charts showed me that i don't ovulate frequently, i don't have fertile cervical mucus to sustain sperm, and the period between ovulation (when it happens) and menstruation is too short for an egg to implant. i cried every cycle, even though we were TTA, because i was afraid it would be hard for me to be a mommy. in march i found out that one of my online friends (who was in the nov DDC here) was pregnant, and that night i cried to alex about how i'd never get pregnant. we had unprotected sex b/c i figured i was infertile anyway... i ovulated w/good CM for the first time in years 3 days later... and now this little peanut is sucking voraciously at my boob.

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Old 01-26-2008, 11:33 PM
 
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Ahh, I haven't even looked at my vagina yet......i am scared.. I didn't tear or anything but it is never quite the same...sigh
We dtd the day I was in labor.....and we had a great sex life
the whole time i was preggo,but I have like zero sex drive now.
I am still using my peri bottle cause wiping drys me out and it burns.

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Old 01-27-2008, 02:10 PM
 
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Sex??? We haven't even done it once. With dh still injured and going through treatments and hving 6 kids to take care of, that is that farthest thing from my mind. Although hubby would like to try it his back prevents him from even that!! Who knows when we will do it again. Hopefully before Madison's first birthday! :
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Old 01-27-2008, 03:02 PM
 
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Sex? I'm using abstinence as birth control.

Actually, I haven't touched or looked at my girlie bits since birth...it's a slow process and it makes me a little squeamish and takes awhile before I'm comfortable with myself again. And if I ain't comfie, no one else is getting near.

A few more weeks, some adequate birth control (I just don't know what at this point) and I'll be ready, I think.

Christa
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Old 01-28-2008, 06:47 AM
 
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Ok, since all y'all are my girls, and you know what sex-fiends my Hubby and I are, I have to confess--Alexander is 3 weeks 2 days and Hubby and I have perfected the art of a quickie more times than I can count on one hand. I came out of birthing nearly a 10 pounder amazingly well with an intact perineum and very little lochia that I am a bit amazed by myself *waits for shoe to drop*. Heck, thee first night, like hours after Alexander was born, I had a naughty dream about my Hubby--I'm nuts! I think it may be because how super wonderful my Hubby was during labor, catching Alexander, and being a great Daddy, that I find super-sexy.

We are pullin and praying until I have my IUD put in. I tried to convince Hubby to go for a snip, as I am sure that this little guy is my last, but *I* am having a hard time giving up my (our) fertility....

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Old 01-28-2008, 04:36 PM
 
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Sex? I'm using abstinence as birth control.
Roger that
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Old 01-28-2008, 04:43 PM
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im feeling kinda sexy lately, but viano isnt a fan of being anywhere but my arms , so no nookie yet....
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Old 01-28-2008, 06:51 PM
 
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nak, here goes lefty

we dtd on beanie's three-week bday, and a couple of times since. my one little skid mark was pretty healed the first time and fine after that, but i have to say the inside still gets a bit sore. feels kind of virginal again, really. : anybody else actually feel tighter?

think i've decided not to go back to work this year, so irish twins could be in the cards. we were actively ttc for a few months with nicky but have never used anything besides withdrawal, which is what we're back to now. so i guess we'll just see...i'd kind of love for #2 to be a surprise.

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Old 01-28-2008, 07:07 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Heck, thee first night, like hours after Alexander was born, I had a naughty dream about my Hubby--I'm nuts! I think it may be because how super wonderful my Hubby was during labor, catching Alexander, and being a great Daddy, that I find super-sexy.
Oh, you little tart you... but it's so true. Something about being a great father makes men incredibly sexy. I keep on looking at Aaron and thinking, damn, I forgot how hot you are.

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Old 01-28-2008, 07:40 PM
 
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Heck, thee first night, like hours after Alexander was born, I had a naughty dream about my Hubby--I'm nuts! I think it may be because how super wonderful my Hubby was during labor, catching Alexander, and being a great Daddy, that I find super-sexy.
i agree, my DH being so amazing and helpful, and catching ryan was so great! i can't wait to jump him!!!! : but i'm 3weeks 2days pp and still bleeding. it didn't stop last time til 7 weeks! argh. its SO much harder to wait this time cause i'm feeling so good and i was only sore for a day or two! ^%&ing lochia!!!!

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Old 01-28-2008, 10:04 PM
 
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we were READY as soon as we met our ds. against my better judgement we tried at 2 wks and i stopped it - ouch. we succeeded at 4 wks and twice more since. it's still pretty painful for the first 3 minutes - there's a spot right at the beginning that makes me want to cry. after that it gets better. i had a couple of skid marks and a nasty hematoma - anyone know if the hematoma, which has healed as far as i know, could be the cause??
i'd really like to bf kieran for at least a year before i get pg again, but also feel like my clock is ticking. it took so long to get pg this first time that i'm half inclined to just see what happens.

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Old 01-29-2008, 12:56 AM
 
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I think this is the first time I am SO not ready or looking forward to it. I had a pretty traumatizing post-birth exam and feel pretty violated still and I did have 2 small (no stitches) tears, so the very though of s-e-x makes me a bit faintish and feel like I'm gonna have a panic attack.

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Old 01-29-2008, 12:33 PM
 
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We dtd at 4 weeks after both girls. Having no stitches makes it much less nerve wracking. Now since then, hardly ever. Two kids in my bed & a lo up until midnight is not too conducive to romance. If the 5 yr old takes a nap on the weekend we're good - if not, nothing for us!

And our condoms didn't expire in the two years it took us to conceive.

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Old 01-29-2008, 01:13 PM
 
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And our condoms didn't expire in the two years it took us to conceive.
Yeah, I meant to come back and post that ours are good until 2011. Unfortunately, there are only three of them left, but I talked DH into buying more to save myself the embarrassment.

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Old 01-29-2008, 02:49 PM
 
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we managed once, at 4 wks pp. it was good, but too rushed, because we had to grab the minute when the baby was sleeping....so, we put her in the crib while dh threw playdoh on the table for the others, and we scurried around to get horizontal! :

but our room is right next to the dining room, and the lock on our door is iffy, and the kids were loud, and then the phone rang, and they all ran to tell us it was ringing....and gosh, it's just damn hard to O when 3 sets of ears are pressed against the door and the baby is starting to snurfle in the crib next to you!

So, for us, the mechanics of the process are working great. But the timing needs work, lol!

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Old 01-29-2008, 04:13 PM
 
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I am 4 weeks pp and dtd once. During was fine (I have an awesome perinium that was perfect after baby) but when I stood up after it felt like my insides were falling out - ouch. This happened with my ds too, but I don't remember when it went away.
Also on a slightly related topic I am still having bleeding I would describe as spotting. I know I only had discharge with my son for a week, so this seems like it can't be right? Anyone else still having red spotting?
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Old 01-29-2008, 04:23 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Also on a slightly related topic I am still having bleeding I would describe as spotting. I know I only had discharge with my son for a week, so this seems like it can't be right? Anyone else still having red spotting?
Oh, yeah, I'm still spotting. I think anywhere in the neighborhood of 6 weeks is very normal.
If the lochia turned brown or yellow then went back to bright red, you could be one of the lucky ones who has had her first postpartum period, joy.

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Old 01-29-2008, 05:51 PM
 
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Oh, yeah, I'm still spotting. I think anywhere in the neighborhood of 6 weeks is very normal.
If the lochia turned brown or yellow then went back to bright red, you could be one of the lucky ones who has had her first postpartum period, joy.
Thanks. Considering my son was 22 months old the first time I ovulated, I don't think it could be that.
It just seems wierd it is so much longer this time. However, I am chasing after an almost 3 year old, not exactly taking it easy, you know what I mean.
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Old 01-31-2008, 03:03 AM
 
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We dtd once at 3 wks PP, and then again at 5 wks. We haven't since then. (7 wks today) Super sore and stingy the first time...slooooow and gentle was the name of the game...stingy the second time too but better...It was scary but really nice, my perenium fared really well this go 'round, so it wasn't too bad- but we've been way too tired and busy to find a moment since! We want to- really bad! We flirt like crazy. *sigh* If only little one could chill with one of my older kids for long enough...
I also need to figure out birth control. Haven't done that yet...
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Old 01-31-2008, 03:12 AM
 
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we banged... while my mom was here visiting.

we both had the itch really bad, and the baby was wide awake. my mom was reading in the living room and when she visits, i frequently give the baby to her when she's up at night to get some sleep in.

but i got some lovin' in instead. i felt so sketchy banging with my mom and daughter hanging out in the other room, but whatever, i needed it.

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Old 01-31-2008, 05:07 AM
 
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we banged...
You are my hero.
......



3wks pp, no sexin in sight.
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Old 01-31-2008, 09:02 AM
 
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like a virgin, HEY! touched for the very first time! like a vir-ir-ir-ir-a-gin, when your heartbeats next to mine!

i was much more nervous about pp sex than when i actually WAS a virgin. but it's been really good, i just make sure the lube is within reach! but we seriously have to get some birth control going - the thought of irish twins make me loco!

dh is going to get the snip, we just have to do some research first.

it makes me sad to think that my baby making days are done, but i think 2 wee ones is plenty for us.
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