I just had a candid talk with my boss . . . - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 13 Old 07-23-2007, 06:05 PM - Thread Starter
 
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and I don't know what to think.

Background: My "plan" when I took this FT job was to work for 3 years (or so), then have baby#3, then quit and homeschool. My other thought was that after 3 years here, I would have the clout to possibly work from home on a PT basis.

So, frankly I'm bored and I hate my job. I'm completely under-utilized and frustrated. I told him so. Apparently the problem is that I've been honest. I told him early on that right now the numbers don't add up for me to keep working after the baby is born. So, he can't really give me anything big and important or seriously interesting because he may lose me come January.

I hate this!!!! I told him I want to come back, but I need a reason to come back. If I'm coming back to what I'm doing now, then I don't want it. I let him know that the key is breastfeeding. If I can work from home PT and come in PT, then I won't be tied to the pump 45 hours/week. That's what I need to make it worth it to come in to the office.

I think he was honest, the company "culture" doesn't support this. The company "culture" doesn't support PT, job shares, work from home, none of it. He doesn't agree with all this, but there's not much he can do. He'll talk to his boss (another man), but who knows. . . .

Anyone else have job woes?
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#2 of 13 Old 07-23-2007, 06:54 PM
 
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that stinks. i was working when pregnant with #1, and there was no way the small business i worked for would have been baby or breastfeeding friendly. i think it's nice that there are some jobs like that.

i quit when i was 6 months pregnant, and never looked back.... we'll ... that is a lie. we've visited a few times when we were up in pa visiting family.

Jenn, wife to John
Mama to Kayleigh (6), Ethan (4), Norah (1), & Charlotte coming 11.09
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#3 of 13 Old 07-25-2007, 10:09 AM - Thread Starter
 
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and you seem to have the option of quitting outside work at some point... so maybe you can move that date up a bit?
Do you mean quit sooner rather than later? I couldn't possibly do that. We need every cent I can earn before this baby comes especially if I end up quitting. And my "option" of quitting is quickly disappearing. DH is having major problems (long story) and I'm not sure he's going to make it in his current job.

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Where I work, there is a history of new mothers being put on the road for work AS SOON AS they get back from maternity leave. And when I say 'on the road', I mean hours (of travel time) away from home, a week or two at a time, for weeks on end.
This sounds like a class-action lawsuit waiting to happen! That's sex discrimination if I've ever heard it! Hoow many of the women stay? How many quit?
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#4 of 13 Old 07-25-2007, 12:34 PM
 
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I HATE my job. I want to quit or work somewhere else, but the stars didnt line up, so I am spending another school year working with severely emotionally disturbed children. I have to be careful about the pregnancy because some of these students are so bad off they would purposely hit me in a time of rage. I have a new boss this year too, whcih wil complicate things. And, I will pump at work, but guess what, as a teacher of SEVERE ED kids where I work, you dont get lunch breaks or any breaks, so I am going to have to really work things out with my aide, who may end up hating me over it!
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#5 of 13 Old 07-25-2007, 01:18 PM
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Good for you for having the conversation with your boss - now at least you know where he stands.
Have you thought about looking for a new job?? If this one isn't willing to give you what you need (and you decide you still want to work) then I'd come back from mat leave and then start looking around.

I have to have a similar conversation with mine before I leave - ie. when/if I come back I need some changes, because the job as it is isn't working for me. I think a mat leave is a great time to make some changes. You're shaking things up anyways. I think he'll be sympathetic (knows it's coming) but we'll see if anything changes.

good luck.

g.

Canadian mama to A (C/S May 2004) and R (induced VBAC Dec 2007) expecting #3 in July.  Currently obsessing over permaculture, photography and beekeeping.

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#6 of 13 Old 07-25-2007, 01:42 PM
 
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Originally Posted by matey View Post
I HATE my job. I want to quit or work somewhere else, but the stars didnt line up, so I am spending another school year working with severely emotionally disturbed children. I have to be careful about the pregnancy because some of these students are so bad off they would purposely hit me in a time of rage. I have a new boss this year too, whcih wil complicate things. And, I will pump at work, but guess what, as a teacher of SEVERE ED kids where I work, you dont get lunch breaks or any breaks, so I am going to have to really work things out with my aide, who may end up hating me over it!
Federal legislation has been dropped in the house to mandate employers make time and space accommodations for pumping moms but it hasn't gotten to the floor yet. Some states already have laws on the books to protect nursing/working moms. If you post your state we can look up your state laws on the topic.

~BV
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#7 of 13 Old 07-25-2007, 07:35 PM
 
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Haven't even told my job yet and I have no idea when I will. Probably when I can no longer hide it with baggy clothing. If I don't get fired, they will do everything possible to make me quit. I just started a few months ago (got pg my first month there : ) so I won't even qualify for FMLA, never mind paid maternity leave. I'll have about a week of sick time/vacation for after the baby is born, assuming I work until I go into labor and have the baby the same day... : But we can't survive without my check, dh just doesn't make enough right now. I'm hoping/praying/wishing that he gets a promotion that he's up for as that would cover about half my monthly pay but the chances aren't great. So, job woes definitely.

Mama to two boys and a girl.
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#8 of 13 Old 07-26-2007, 10:55 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Maybe your DH could find another job before baby comes?
DH actually just started a wonderful new job. He's making $6K more than he was at his last job, and the benefits are absolutely amazing! The only problem is: He's miserable!!!! He's literally having a breakdown. We go back to his psych on Friday, and who knows???? (if you want to know more about DH see: this thread) I don't know. . . .

You all may have noticed I changed my siggy. I just can't think about staying home right now. I don't know how we're going to make this whole thing work, but I guess we'll make it work somehow. . .
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#9 of 13 Old 07-26-2007, 01:01 PM
 
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IF you qualify for FMLA, that opens a few more possibilities. DH took his whole 12 weeks even though only the first two were paid w/ his vacation pay. In the mean time he had found a second job, but still remaining technically employed by the first meant insurance coverage continued (although it was a mute point as job #2 offered immed. insurance). He just had to go back to job #1 for one day before quitting so they couldn't bill us for all the insurance. Apparently a LOT of people use FMLA like this.

A second alternative, but it might be a little late to sign up, I don't know the specifics, is to sign up for diability insurance. Disability pays usually 80-100% of your salary the entire 12 weeks of FMLA leave. My aunt gets 100% of her salary!! Don't ask me why she's not taking the whole 12 weeks...
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#10 of 13 Old 07-26-2007, 01:14 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bryonyvaughn View Post
Federal legislation has been dropped in the house to mandate employers make time and space accommodations for pumping moms but it hasn't gotten to the floor yet. Some states already have laws on the books to protect nursing/working moms. If you post your state we can look up your state laws on the topic.

~BV
I am in Missouri. My bosses wife is pregnant and due the same time I am, so I am hoping he will be somewhat sympathetic. My old boss wouldnt have been, she was married to her job and her kids were the students. Anyone who put something before work was looked down on in her eyes, so my "it's a just a job" attitude had to be hidden around her. I am going to go in to work next week and see the new boss, since I havent met him, and discuss maternity leave and stuff. I want 12 weeks but everyone acts like this is outrageous and impossible! This is my fifth year and DH and I have said we will do whatever to make it work if I can make it happen.
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#11 of 13 Old 07-26-2007, 07:09 PM - Thread Starter
 
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FMLA - Since I started 3/17, I won't qualify till 3/16 of next year.

Disability - One of the advantages of working for an engineering company is that they pay for everyone's Short Term. They also (I'd never heard of this before) provide stop-gap pay - from when my sick & vac times ends and the disability begins.

DH will also have only been at his job 6.5 months when the baby comes, so he can't take FMLA until mid-May. Maybe he could take it then and look for a new job?

Whatever, I can't think about all that right now . . . .

Thanks everyone!!!
--LEE
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#12 of 13 Old 07-27-2007, 09:10 AM
 
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Originally Posted by matey View Post
I am in Missouri...
I just looked it up and, man oh man, Missouri has crappy laws for breastfeeding. I guess the best I can offer is a LLL article on negotiating pumping accommodations with you boss.

I wish you well,
BV
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#13 of 13 Old 07-27-2007, 12:37 PM
 
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Originally Posted by bryonyvaughn View Post
I just looked it up and, man oh man, Missouri has crappy laws for breastfeeding. I guess the best I can offer is a LLL article on negotiating pumping accommodations with you boss.

I wish you well,
BV
Not a big surprise, oh well, I will just have to be demanding. Hey, this is my fifth year, this is my bosses first. I will tell him what's up!
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