Zahirakids - yes, focusing on the moment, where you are now, and what's happening is a good way to get oriented, realize you are safe, etc. I actually did some self-talk and talked with dh going over the exercises (from memory
) from my panic attack workbook. I named the three most distressing physical sensations I was having, went through a relaxation script (again from memory
) to remind myself that just because I feel alarmed doesn't mean anything terrible is happening. It's just a panic attack, it'll pass. I talked with dh about the things that have been stressing me and realized I felt like I had to "do it all".
I feel better today after having had some more rest. Dh is starting to feel better from his bronchitis and this morning we did some housecleaning together. That made me feel better. I also reflected and said to myself, I don't have to take it ALL on.
My dreams for several nights have been overwhelmed and like I feel overly responsible for things. Gotta do some self care and RELAX. I'm going to get a massage tomorrow.
Part of it is all this clutter from so much kid stuff in our little space, plus dishes, chores, etc. Since we've been sick it's all been piling up. I can only do so much with a newborn and bfing etc. Poor dh has been sick on and off for 3 wks, working his butt off, helping tons with the older dd, and then there's the grieving. My mom offered to have my dd1 sleep over so we could get a chance to heal and rest. Bless her! We took her up on it last night.
In terms of the housework, today we were starting to chip away at it. I think I'm going to have to get a black garbage bag and start culling dd1's toy stash, and donate some stuff to charity. Either that or put some away, to be taken out later to rotate the toys. Something needs to be done. I am also overwhelmed by the thought of keeping up with the house cleaning. We had a cleaning lady once a week or two ago. If it was something we could afford $ more often, I'd do it. Must sit down and see if it fits into the budget.
That's another thing - finances. There's a bit of a delay before my maternity leave benefits start so we're really really really really tight on cash right now. Take a deep breath girl........and relax.......... Things are looking up.
As for the rescue remedy, I use it sometimes, but this panic attack was like a 9/10 on the richter scale. It really startled me because it was SO intense...well it was the beginnings of it anyway.
kehliouise - It's good to hear that you felt a bit better after visiting your mother. I think many of us here can relate to worrying about their kids fitting well together, getting along, etc. Sounds like you are worried all the time. I felt that way for the first two years of dd1's life! It's exhausting to second guess yourself all the time and feel a lack of self confidence.
Does your dh know how you feel? Does your mom support you? Have you ever gone for counselling for anxiety?