THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!!! I need to vent so bad.
Sometimes I think it's going well, other times I feel like a complete failure. I got peed on, as in directly on, for the first time last night, which was our colickiest night yet. When Terran or I gets that upset, the EC tends to just go out the window but this time almost seemed deliberate, as if he was mad at me for not recognizing his signals. I do, in retrospect, but it seems so insensitive to hold a crying, screaming, struggling baby over a sink trying to catch excrement instead of cuddling him and comforting him.
On the positive side, EC is making me so much more aware of the other ways he can communicate: he's not just a screaming baby in a car seat, he is able to subtly communicate whether I need to start looking for a nice place to pull over for awhile and nurse or whether I need to get off the freeway at the next exit NOW.
I love ECing when we're out and about; there are wet dipes to change, but he completely understands the cuing noise and "empties out" before I put the fresh dipe on and his little co-conspirator smiles are priceless. As fastidious as both of my boys are, I thought it would be much harder to introduce him to the idea of "examining the rear tire" at the peace march than it was, but I just held him slightly outside the car door, cued him, and he went. MUCH easier than trying to juggle all those body parts and/or change a dipe in a port-a-pottie.
I was hoping to be diaper free very quickly, but since things aren't working out that way I'd like to get to a state of equilibrium where we can still EC for fun and for whatever benefits it brings to our relationship without feeling so guilty about not being a perfect parent. This really is my second failure, since ds1 tried so hard to let me know that EC was possible and I HAD read The Continuum Concept by the time he was born, but for some reason I didn't think it was possible for an infant to communicate their needs in this way in a modern culture.