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#1 of 19 Old 03-24-2008, 08:54 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Well, Peter is still a demon baby. We're now thinking that possibly he is reacting to dairy in my diet, but not sure about that. He broke out in baby acne last week, but this is acne that covers his entire head (all throughout his hair), goes down onto his neck, onto his chest and shoulders, and on his upper back.

Geez this sounds horrible, but I just want my easy, happy baby back.

I stopped all dairy, even hidden, yesterday morning. What if that's not it? What if he just continues NOT SLEEPING until he's older? Today was an "easier" day in that I actually got to put him down for about 45 minutes total during the hours of 8:30am to 6:00pm. At 6pm dh took over - Peter has not slept since 3:00pm and it's now almost 8:00pm. He's not really crying, he's just awake and wanting to be in arms constantly. If we put him down he fusses and cries.

Ds2 was a horrible baby (great toddler though!). He screamed all the time. I could never put him down, and he never slept. Even when we got some of his issues, like reflux, fixed, he still didn't sleep. I spiraled into a depression that my OB/GYN still describes as "incapacitating." I was sooooo incredibly relieved when Peter seemed to be nothing like ds2!

Just tell me it will be ok. I'll get my baby back somehow, right?

A happy woman
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#2 of 19 Old 03-24-2008, 09:11 PM
 
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s

Alex had acne like that and it just cleared up, but I've been pretty confident that he wasn't reacting to anything in my diet. If it is dietary, remember that it can take upwards of two weeks for dairy proteins to leave your body. I'd definitely look into reflux issues and medicate if necessary - what you are describing with Peter sounds exactly like Alex. I couldn't get over the fact that he slept - out of arms - for long periods of time. Then once we got breastfeeding down at around 3weeks, he slowly changed - his sleep became more and more erratic, would only sleep in arms or doze next to me on the couch, he started spitting up and then vomiting, and he started screaming very angrily in the evenings. We could get him to stop, but it took some doing. We ended up in the ER because of some stridor and the fact he had vomited three times that day and got the dx of reflux (they scoped him and saw erosions in his throat). Once he started Zantac, we got our laid-back little man back. In fact I just took him to the ped's today for a weight check so I could get his Zantac dosage adjusted because he's started vomiting again and his sleep is off.

For the sleep, the thing that almost always works for Alex is to swaddle him and then pop him in the sling - I'll bounce him and shush him for a bit and then wait until his breathing changes and he's in a deep sleep, then I'll gently lower him into the bouncy or the infant carseat - I can usualy get at least an hour out-of-arms on a bad day that way.

I hope things work out for you - try to get some sleep when you can. Pixar, Noggin and PBS Sprout : have raised Michael for a few mornings when I got Alex down at last because I was that bone tired. My husband even took the baby for the first part of the night and some pumped milk so I could get a solid 3-4 hours of sleep just to get on top of the sleep deprivation.

s again, and let us know how things are going, even if it's just to vent.
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#3 of 19 Old 03-24-2008, 11:23 PM
 
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no advice, just big hugs! it's physically painful when my ds cries for 5 minutes, i can't even imagine what you're going through. have you tried gripe water?

SAHM to Hannah (11/04), Cash (02/08), and Adelaide (07/10) dh, Chris.
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#4 of 19 Old 03-25-2008, 03:42 AM
 
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I'm so sorry he has baby acne as well- it's so much harder to deal with the behaviour when they don't look pretty (IMO)
That- the being awake but needing to be with people, in arms, held warm and safe- sounds more like Skye. Like my boys, she's high-intensity, but the only bad thing you can say about her is that she is a very clingy little girl and she needs the close physical contact with mummy to feel safe. In retrospect, I wonder if we should have tried cranio-sacral therapy for her because the last month of pregnancy was so hard on me, it must have had some impact on her too. If you decide to go down the route of trying to fix him, I'd start there.
Now, of course, she's grown into a typical toddler with strops and tantrums and even (gasp) running away, so it will get better. It might just be a hard journey for you, especially coming so soon after your PPD. After Isaac, I had no idea how to interact with this little person who actually liked me. It can be insanely hard to be touched all the time as well.

Helen mum to five and mistress of mess and mayhem, making merry and mischief til the sun goes down.
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#5 of 19 Old 03-25-2008, 09:49 AM
 
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Just wanted to send some support. I hope something changes soon!
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#6 of 19 Old 03-25-2008, 10:56 AM
 
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Ds was the same way with the screaming and the not sleeping. He is the most delightful toddler though and since you have been through it before--a horrible baby that turns into a great toddler--you know that this too, shall pass. Hard to imagine or even care when you are in the moment, I know. From babysitting all the kids I do (a 2.5 year old, my 2 year old, a 1.5 year old, a 6 month old, and my 2 month old) the best thing that I do to keep myself sane is just not let the crying get to me because I am doing the best I can and that is all I can do. If I need breakfast and the baby is going to fuss if I set her down to go make it, I set her down and go make it. When ds was a baby I would have stayed on the rocking chair and tried to keep him quiet to the point of tears because I was so sick and hungry. Since then I have learned to give myself permission to put the babies down and take care of my physical needs when they need to be taken care of because a hungry, tired, stressed out mom ready to break down does no one any good. I may modify my plans and just pour a bowl of cereal instead of making a 3 course meal but I no longer let the crying get to me to the point that I try to be super mom and do everything in my power every minute of the day to stop it or prevent it. I think that learning that through babysitting really helped because instead of breaking down several times a day like I used to do when ds was a newborn, I rarely feel stressed or overwhelmed this time around with dd, even though I have a house full of children under 3, 4 days a week.

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#7 of 19 Old 03-25-2008, 11:09 AM
 
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I'm so sorry you'r dealing with all this operamommy. I can't imagine, as I can't deal with a few minutes of crying. I wanted to offer my hugs and support though I have no advice to give. I'm thinking of you.

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#8 of 19 Old 03-25-2008, 04:42 PM - Thread Starter
 
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We went to the dr. today. He said that the acne on Peter's head, face, etc. was a rash and to try changing fabric softener. Other than that he said that Peter had gained double what they expected to see and that he was just a grump.

I feel incredibly angry and hopeless. He didn't sleep but for 5 minutes at a stretch for almost 7 hours yesterday. I can't do this again.

A happy woman
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#9 of 19 Old 03-25-2008, 05:52 PM
 
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Big hugs to you. My dd is similar to you son. She slept really well the first three weeks of her life and since then she will only sleep in arms and the longest stretch seems about 30 minutes but usually more like 10. It is exhausting carrying her around all day but I feel super fortunate that she sleeps well at night - providing that she is touching me. I can only hope day sleeping will get better for us. We all could use a bit of time off during the day.
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#10 of 19 Old 03-25-2008, 05:53 PM
 
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Originally Posted by operamommy View Post
We went to the dr. today. He said that the acne on Peter's head, face, etc. was a rash and to try changing fabric softener. Other than that he said that Peter had gained double what they expected to see and that he was just a grump.

I feel incredibly angry and hopeless. He didn't sleep but for 5 minutes at a stretch for almost 7 hours yesterday. I can't do this again.
I'd really seek out a dx for reflux - if he's eating that much and that miserable I think it's a good possibility.
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#11 of 19 Old 03-25-2008, 07:30 PM
 
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It feels like I'm banging on a bit, but a weigh gain in excess of 2lb a month (Alex was gaining a pound a week) is one of the symptoms of an oversupply issue, which can cause reflux. This also gives you something to try before you start medicating with Zantac or another antacid...

Reading your original post, can you clarify what's going on? Is the problem that he is desperately miserable and you need to help him? Or is the problem that he's demanding more of you than you have to give right now and so you're burning out???

(This isn't a judgemental question, btw- I've been there, done both. I just need to know whether I should be sending you unconditional support vibes or offering you ideas to change your son's behaviour patterns.)

Helen mum to five and mistress of mess and mayhem, making merry and mischief til the sun goes down.
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#12 of 19 Old 03-25-2008, 09:09 PM
 
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nak

i haven't been paying much attention, but do you have a sling or mei tai or wrap?

linnaea was super easy at first too, she slept by herself (so different from my first) then she started to fuss quite a bit. she would wake up screaming and cry to be held after just a few minutes down. so i sling her (i'm in a co-op for a mei tai yay!) almost all day and she's back to sleeping tons (in the sling) which is better than fussing!!

dh and i switch off with the sling and she's pretty happy. i know this sounds awful but i have so much milk that she wants to nurse after her tummy is full so i got her a pacifier. i figure it's better than screaming and puking up tons of milk. dh will use the nubby until she shows she really wants to nurse again.

so, big hugs, i know that fussing is hard to deal with, good luck!

also, i have no experience whatsoever with this but i have heard that cranio-sacral therapy (is that even spelled right?) can be helpful with babies that have no external causes for extreme fussiness.

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#13 of 19 Old 03-25-2008, 09:31 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by flapjack View Post
It feels like I'm banging on a bit, but a weigh gain in excess of 2lb a month (Alex was gaining a pound a week) is one of the symptoms of an oversupply issue, which can cause reflux. This also gives you something to try before you start medicating with Zantac or another antacid...

Reading your original post, can you clarify what's going on? Is the problem that he is desperately miserable and you need to help him? Or is the problem that he's demanding more of you than you have to give right now and so you're burning out???

(This isn't a judgemental question, btw- I've been there, done both. I just need to know whether I should be sending you unconditional support vibes or offering you ideas to change your son's behaviour patterns.)

Flapjack, his weight gain was 2 pounds in 2 1/2 weeks. He was 9 lbs. 1 oz at 2 1/2 weeks, and 11 lbs. 1 oz. today at 5 weeks. I will do some reading about oversupply. It's funny, here I was a tiny bit worried that he wasn't getting enough milk (I NEVER leak!) and turns out he's getting tons.

As for clarifying what's going on...yes to both! I truly think something is bothering him. He is having a lot of trouble sleeping. Used to be that he was easy to get to sleep and keep asleep - now he most often drifts off for just a few minutes then pops back awake, even when held. Before the other week we were able to always lay him down in either the swing or his bassinet to sleep. I was also able to put him down when he was awake at least long enough to eat breakfast, go to the bathroom, etc. He would either sit in the swing or bouncy and chill and sometimes drift off. Now I'm lucky if I can lay him down long enough to change ds2's diaper before he's crying.

Last night he wanted to cluster nurse before bed (his normal routine) but he'd nurse then pull off at the end crying and angry. I'd calm him, and then he'd give nursing cues again. So I'd put him back on, and 10 min. later the same thing. I tried offering the paci in case he just wanted to suck without milk but no dice. We did this for 2 hours.

I dunno. It's a huge change in his behavior from the first 3 1/2 weeks. If you all think it's just normal baby stuff then tell me. I won't be offended.

nausicamom, dh and I talked earlier and agreed that if he doesn't improve within a week (that will give the caffeine and dairy some time to leave my system) that we'll seek out someone with more knowledge of reflux.

PlayaMama, dh and I also agreed in our talk that we need to wear him more. He usually likes being in the sling, so thanks for the reminder.

Everyone else, thank you. I'm feeling much more positive. Being allowed to vent/ask for advice/whine and feel supported makes a huge impact.

A happy woman
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#14 of 19 Old 03-26-2008, 03:42 AM
 
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I'm probably a really bad person for thinking this, but I'm largely just really relieved that someone other than me has got the high-needs little boy : i think that some of this is his temperament, and that in years to come you're going to look back at this and say "we should have known." I don't think anything has changed, he's just woken up a bit and is showing you what an amazing and awesome person he is: and he IS. He's gorgeous
The evening screaming could be colic, could be the result of not napping for so long- and I'd keep trying to get him to nap for longer. If you haven't already, then switch him to one boob every 2 hours or so, and if that doesn't work then go with Zantac. If it is a supply imbalance, though, I found that mine balanced itself out very nicely at 6 weeks and I don't even need to block-feed any more- so you may only have another week or so to go. The only other things I can think of are fennel tea (you drink it, it settles his stomach) or a trip to a chiropractor to see if the stresses of those last weeks of pregnancy played a part- and wasn't labour with him a lot longer than with your others? It might be worth a try, if insurance covers it.

Helen mum to five and mistress of mess and mayhem, making merry and mischief til the sun goes down.
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#15 of 19 Old 03-26-2008, 04:00 PM
 
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just last night linnaea did exactly what you describe! she wanted to nurse then she'd pull off and SCREAM! no little i'm upset cries nothing but a huge ear-splitting scream! so i bounce her, she burps, and it kept going for like 45 minutes!

i'm trying the nubby and she pushes it out and pukes a ton of milk. she finally calms down and i let her suck on my pinkie for about a half an hour before she finally decided to sleep.

i keep hoping my supply decreases but i just keep leaking milk all over the place

she is also happier when upright, now i'm considering reflux issues for her. keep us updated on what's happening!

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#16 of 19 Old 03-26-2008, 04:14 PM
 
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My Ds now two and 1/2 had similar problems and what we finally figured out (w/ no help from the dr) was that I had "overactive letdown syndrome" and that was giving him painful gas on top of his reflux. Slings saved my life. I also used a hand pump to express a little foremilk before nursing so DS got more rich, less gassy hind milk. It took a few days, but it worked. I also nursed him at EVERY opportunity, no schedules, etc. Cosleeping helped and so did "The Fussy Baby Book" by Dr Sears and my local LLL leaders. Good luck!
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#17 of 19 Old 03-27-2008, 02:28 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I have a quick minute while the kids are eating lunch and Peter is sleeping in the sling....

We had a better day yesterday. I wore him for most of the day, and that kept him happy and helped him sleep. I also discovered that he LOVES the sound of water running in the bathtub - he actually fell asleep in the bouncy seat listening to it run. I got him a sound machine last night with a waterfall and rain sounds on it; we'll see if that helps too.

A happy woman
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#18 of 19 Old 03-27-2008, 02:38 PM
 
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Originally Posted by operamommy View Post
I have a quick minute while the kids are eating lunch and Peter is sleeping in the sling....

We had a better day yesterday. I wore him for most of the day, and that kept him happy and helped him sleep. I also discovered that he LOVES the sound of water running in the bathtub - he actually fell asleep in the bouncy seat listening to it run. I got him a sound machine last night with a waterfall and rain sounds on it; we'll see if that helps too.
If you have a dishwasher maybe he will like that, too! Ds and dd both loved sleeping in the bouncy next to the dishwasher with the wooshing water noises.

mommy to ds 11/05, dd1 01/08, and dd2 01/10!
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#19 of 19 Old 03-27-2008, 07:18 PM
 
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Originally Posted by operamommy View Post
I have a quick minute while the kids are eating lunch and Peter is sleeping in the sling....

We had a better day yesterday. I wore him for most of the day, and that kept him happy and helped him sleep. I also discovered that he LOVES the sound of water running in the bathtub - he actually fell asleep in the bouncy seat listening to it run. I got him a sound machine last night with a waterfall and rain sounds on it; we'll see if that helps too.
I was thinking about you - : that things continue to work well.
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