So I did it... I looked in the mirror - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 11 Old 05-08-2008, 12:57 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I almost hate to do this... but how are people feeling about their "self image"?? I know that just normally I have a problem with mine I have ran borderline anorexic most of my life, and with the birth of my son I was in a relationship that just amplified that fact (my ex was HIGHLY abusive in many way). It took me almost a 1.5y to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight, and as soon as I started to get nice body tone I fond my self prego again. I know that I am only a month, PP but I would REALLY like to be able to stop wearing my prego-clothes, and fit in some REAL pants again... my mum's friend's girlfriend gave her some clothes to give to me, clothes that were too large on her; Nothing fit. mer.... I used charting my cycles to help me have control over my body, but with no monthly, I have no cycle yet to chart. I feel like I am about to go mad! I feel like my 2yo about to freak out, jump up and down, and just cry. I know I need to do something, something good and +, before I go off the deep end and do something silli and rash.

How are others feeling?
What have you done, if anything?
What are you doing, if anything?
What will you be doing?
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#2 of 11 Old 05-08-2008, 01:09 AM
 
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hang in there...right after is such a hard time...you lose this big chunk of weight, but still have more...you are too small for maternity, but still too big for pp clothes...hate to buy for this hopefully not too long limbo stage...Just got the ok yesterday to start exercise, so I think i'll start slow (as soon as I figure out where in my waking hours to squeeze it) can you maybe concentrate on a healthy diet and exercise as a way to have some measurable control?

good luck
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#3 of 11 Old 05-08-2008, 01:20 AM
 
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I have body image issues as well, including what I now suspect was an eating disorder when I was a kidling. When I started to go out with DH, my first and only boyfriend, he had to deal with this weird, messed-up woman who was convinced she was deformed, so ugly she 'didn't count' as a 'real' female, accused him of lying if he said she was pretty, etc. I'm amazed he stayed with me, frankly. I've improved a bit since then, but I still found it hard to cope gracefully with pregnancy changes. I fought against the temptation to believe that measuring small was a good thing; I was very upset about getting my stretchmarks.

I do fit back into my normal clothes, but my stretchmarks still make me rather sad. I got them badly due to pre-eclampsia swelling--I have them on my calves! And on one breast, but not the other--no idea what that's all about. Anyway, I find that having them on my tummy kind of discourages me from exercising. I figure 'Why bother, it'll never look nice again anyway'. And I hate thinking like that.

That all sounds pretty doomy and dire, but to be fair I don't actually think those thoughts that often. For one thing, I'm too busy with the baby. And loving little Rowan as much as I do, and knowing I'd do it all again for her in a heartbeat if I had to, really helps. Plus, MDC is full of commiserators, and that's comforting!

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#4 of 11 Old 05-08-2008, 12:30 PM
 
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I have been hating myself lately. I was almost 10 lbs from pre pregnancy weight and then poof I gained an additional 10 lbs. I really am miserable but I just can't motivate myself to do something about it. My new LO is so clingy I can't really exercise with her until she gets a little better with her head control. I could walk with her but I am SOOO lazy. Also, Me+LO+4year old= disaster in public. My son has PDD so he can really require some major hands on attention at times and I just haven't found my groove with that while toting LO. Excuse after Excuse, I will be fat forever!

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#5 of 11 Old 05-08-2008, 01:56 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by chase_mommy View Post
I have been hating myself lately. I was almost 10 lbs from pre pregnancy weight and then poof I gained an additional 10 lbs. I really am miserable but I just can't motivate myself to do something about it. My new LO is so clingy I can't really exercise with her until she gets a little better with her head control. I could walk with her but I am SOOO lazy. Also, Me+LO+4year old= disaster in public. My son has PDD so he can really require some major hands on attention at times and I just haven't found my groove with that while toting LO. Excuse after Excuse, I will be fat forever!

s

Walking would be good... maybe take the 4yo to the park have the LO in a sling, and walk around (yes in circles) the play ground? Just an idea.
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#6 of 11 Old 05-09-2008, 12:17 AM
 
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I do use the ringsling that I made all the time. I really don’t know what I would do without it. About the park. That is really only doable when dad is with us. DS sometimes is really really demanding. I can just se him being stuck on top of the slide and me and babe climbing to his rescue. I am going to start walking but I am going to have to inlist in a partner first. Maybe I just need to go on Survivor; all those chicks are super skinny.

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#7 of 11 Old 05-09-2008, 01:19 AM
 
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it totally sucks to not fit into my clothes!!! so we went to the really big thrift store last night and I got clothes that fit who cares if they only fit for a month or 2, they hardly cost much and they fit!

I'm walking lots especially with our 3 yr old (wuith the babe in a carrier) but somethings out of alignment or something and currently i'm just sore when i walk and REALLY sore afterwards. so more chiroprator visits for me. once I get my body feeling right I can work at adding more activity.

i'm trying to remember that my body just went through this HUGE transformation and is doing its best to go back to pre-pregnant state but it's okay for that to take time.
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#8 of 11 Old 05-09-2008, 01:53 AM
 
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that's me exactly beth. I got denied the exercise pass from my chiro...hopefully he'll allow me when I see him next week, although I've been walking a bunch anyway. But I'm SO ready for cardio. I've got around 15lbs till my pre-preg weight (put on a lot those last two weeks) and am dying to lose it!

Jill, mama to three fiery girlies and a sweet baby boy: Grace, 11.30.2005,  Ayla, 3.22.2008, Norah 9.5.09, Reed 8.19.11 & dfs Gage 2.29.12   angel1.gif x4
 

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#9 of 11 Old 05-09-2008, 03:54 PM
 
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Originally Posted by chase_mommy View Post
I do use the ringsling that I made all the time. I really don’t know what I would do without it. About the park. That is really only doable when dad is with us. DS sometimes is really really demanding. I can just se him being stuck on top of the slide and me and babe climbing to his rescue. .
If it helps, I have a ds almost 5 and dd almost 3, and dd 7 weeks....we go to the park and, like I did when dd#1 was a baby, little one in sling and otherwise "normal" I've climbed up lots of structures to rescue big brother and sister...it may seem crazy, but its doable! For me I need to get the other kids out of the house and it just feels better to be out in the open air. good luck!
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#10 of 11 Old 05-09-2008, 07:43 PM
 
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I'm using vitamin E oil on the stretch marks. They're way faded after just a week.

Making a March 9th sandwich with a Halloween filling.
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#11 of 11 Old 05-10-2008, 12:02 AM
 
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I've lost half the weight I gained. I still feel like a cow. Sigh.
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