I called 911 on someone today for the first time . . . - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 58 Old 12-17-2008, 12:34 AM
 
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This is the kind of thing I was worried about happening today.

I was driving home with all the kids from a two hour grocery shopping trip. My stomach was upset and I knew that I wasn't going to make it home without going to the bathroom. The closest place was a McDonald's. I pulled into the parking lot and had to decide whether to unload the stroller and all the children and poop myself or leave them in the van and run inside. I ran in. Luckily for me, there wasn't someone who called the cops. That would have been embarassing to explain to an officer.
did you also leave the door wide open in the 9 degree weather and say "So?" when someone told you children can die from the cold?

You did the right thing. Something is seriously "off" about that situation and I hope cps does a follow up.

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#32 of 58 Old 12-17-2008, 02:01 AM
 
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Originally Posted by phathui5 View Post
This is the kind of thing I was worried about happening today.

I was driving home with all the kids from a two hour grocery shopping trip. My stomach was upset and I knew that I wasn't going to make it home without going to the bathroom. The closest place was a McDonald's. I pulled into the parking lot and had to decide whether to unload the stroller and all the children and poop myself or leave them in the van and run inside. I ran in. Luckily for me, there wasn't someone who called the cops. That would have been embarassing to explain to an officer.

Why would you need to take a stroller in? Why not just grab the kids?
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#33 of 58 Old 12-17-2008, 02:03 AM
 
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You know I am very cautious about jumping to call the police or CPS but in this case I think you made the right decision.
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#34 of 58 Old 12-17-2008, 02:28 AM
 
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This is the kind of thing I was worried about happening today.

I was driving home with all the kids from a two hour grocery shopping trip. My stomach was upset and I knew that I wasn't going to make it home without going to the bathroom. The closest place was a McDonald's. I pulled into the parking lot and had to decide whether to unload the stroller and all the children and poop myself or leave them in the van and run inside. I ran in. Luckily for me, there wasn't someone who called the cops. That would have been embarassing to explain to an officer.
I've done the same thing in the past. I could not hold my pee any longer. I considered going on the side of the road next to my car, but decided it would be better to go to a gas station. Thankfully, there were no customers and one of the clerks (and older woman) was willing to go stand beside my car while I went to the restroom.

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#35 of 58 Old 12-17-2008, 03:35 AM
 
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Why in the UAV did the mother not take her child with her? I have three with one on the way-all 5 and under-and I still will always ALWAYS take them in the place with me, no matter what.
I hope she gets in trouble.

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#36 of 58 Old 12-17-2008, 03:00 PM
 
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I would have done the same thing, heck yesterday I almost called the cops about a family who was leaving the doctors office the same time as us. Mom had baby in an infant seat and a 4ish year old. Gma was in the car with a 2/3 ish year old. Tiny, Tiny car, I watched them put the kids in, 4 year old in the middle, no booster, just seatbelt, 2/3 yr old in a hbb and infant in bucket but with no base, watched mom buckle it in, she took about 30 secs to do it and she had a bundle me on the carseat and somehow routed the belt through there?? There was no way it was properly secured.....It makes me sad/angry when I see situations like that and I never know what to do.

Re: Peeing with little ones, whenever I take a long car trip by myself I keep a BBLP in the front seat (for DD as well as myself), if I have to go and there is nowhere to stop or DD is sleeping I pull over, sit on the BBLP in the drivers seat and then dump it out the window. I've only had to to do it once, but it was a lifesaver. Not easy, but possible, much easier in a van I would think.

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#37 of 58 Old 12-17-2008, 03:32 PM
 
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Can I ask a really stupid off topic question?

9+ degrees here isn't that cold (where I live) or are you talking F instead of C degrees? Or am I just acclimated to colder weather where 9+degrees seems warm to me?

Not that I condone what she did, you never leave a child in the car by themselves and I do think you both did the right thing. Imagine if it wasn't your husband and some stranger who was looking to snatch that kid out of the van?

I'm a hard core fanatic about not leaving kids in vehicles under any circumstance and that woman's nonchalant response was sickening. Way to go "mom" for not giving a rat's patootie about your kid and their safety.

Awesome job to you and your husband though, thank you for caring when no one else would.
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#38 of 58 Old 12-17-2008, 03:48 PM
 
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Yes 9F which is -13c.

At -15, cold weather alerts are issued here, more churches open up for shelters for the homeless, schools and day cares have to keep kids inside, etc.

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#39 of 58 Old 12-17-2008, 11:21 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Can I ask a really stupid off topic question?

9+ degrees here isn't that cold (where I live) or are you talking F instead of C degrees? Or am I just acclimated to colder weather where 9+degrees seems warm to me?
I did say 9 degrees F in my OP, I think . . . I'm used to cold winters (coldest it's gotten here is -20 degrees F (NOT wind chill, but actual temp). 9 F is cold, really bitter cold. There was a cold wind, too. I consider anything under 20 F to be uncomfortably cold. In the morning when I scraped the ice off the car, I was out for only a minute or two and when I got in the car, my cheeks hurt and were bright red from the cold.

I don't think 9 C is cold at all. I would have definitely watched the kid but maybe not called 911 if it was 48 degrees F (which is 9 C). That's practically balmy! When I was a kid, we'd pull out the shorts & short sleeves in the spring when it reached 50 F (about 10 C, I guess?). LOL

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This is the kind of thing I was worried about happening today.

I was driving home with all the kids from a two hour grocery shopping trip. My stomach was upset and I knew that I wasn't going to make it home without going to the bathroom. The closest place was a McDonald's. I pulled into the parking lot and had to decide whether to unload the stroller and all the children and poop myself or leave them in the van and run inside. I ran in. Luckily for me, there wasn't someone who called the cops. That would have been embarassing to explain to an officer.
I did think about something like this. However, I'm hoping you would have left the car shut and locked, especially in very cold weather. Also, I don't know how old your kids are. And while it would have been embarrassing, I'd think this is the kind of emergency you could explain to an officer. I did think about this sort of scenario, like if someone was having a health problem. But I also thought that in that case, s/he might need more help anyway.

As it was, the mom couldn't care less and was there to buy bottled water and laundry detergent.

I know this probably wouldn't work with diarrhea, but I've been known to use a disposable diaper once or twice when I was in a difficult position, had to pee and was having baby/toddler issues. I've contemplated buying a pack of adult diapers, just to have them for those rare emergencies.

I'm glad no one called the cops on you. It's really hard when one is stuck in one of those really tricky situations to know what to do.
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#40 of 58 Old 12-17-2008, 11:29 PM
 
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So- I think if I was in that emergency poo situation I wouldn't be offended at all if someone called the cops and I am not thinking the cops would think I was doing anything wrong. In fact, that would be a display of healthy community. A mom, alone with her kids needs help- police are for helping, not just out to get the bad guys.

I think the OP did the right thing. You stayed near the kids, called for help and made sure everything was okay.
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#41 of 58 Old 12-17-2008, 11:35 PM
 
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i would have called to. aside from being cold its like a pedophile's jackpot. i can't believe people sometimes. she probably figured that since it wasn't hot outside he would be ok for a minute (which theoretically he would have) but the leaving the door open part blows my mind. i am not a fan of leaving the littles in the car.. but i can see the rationale that its not hot and therefore not as dangerous.. but leaving the door open? sheesh does she even like her kid?
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#42 of 58 Old 12-18-2008, 01:32 PM
 
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Why would you need to take a stroller in? Why not just grab the kids?
I would need to have at least the one year old in the stroller so that I didn't have to hold him while pooping. I didn't want to have all four kids waiting around (and the younger two touching the nasty bathroom) while I went.

Plus, the minutes it would have taken me to get them all out of the van would have made it um, too late.

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#43 of 58 Old 12-18-2008, 01:49 PM
 
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Yeah but your oldest is 8. This was one 3 year old. I've had situations like yours in this past summer where I stopped at Walgreens and grabbed both kids (mine were 3 and 1 at the time) because leaving them in the car is just not safe. If the oldest was 8, I probably would have left them.

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#44 of 58 Old 12-18-2008, 04:29 PM
 
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This is the kind of thing I was worried about happening today.

I was driving home with all the kids from a two hour grocery shopping trip. My stomach was upset and I knew that I wasn't going to make it home without going to the bathroom. The closest place was a McDonald's. I pulled into the parking lot and had to decide whether to unload the stroller and all the children and poop myself or leave them in the van and run inside. I ran in. Luckily for me, there wasn't someone who called the cops. That would have been embarassing to explain to an officer.
Seriously, I would have had some dirty undies to clean. I would NEVER leave the kids in the car, never, never, never, ever. It has happened to me actually (I had the stomach bug and was coming home from a prenatal appt.) because I am very paranoid and I am scared someone WOULD call the cops or someone would steal my kids, but that is just me.
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#45 of 58 Old 12-18-2008, 04:47 PM
 
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Yikes! I would like to say I would have done the same thing, but I was in a simliar situation once. It wasn't cold out, or hot. Mild weather. My mother, DD and I were at a little strip mall. DD and mom were inside and I was standing outside; a woman pulled up, attempted to get a screaming preschool aged boy out of the car, got frustrated and left him while she went inside a pizza place. She could not have seen him from inside the store. I figured she would be in and out, maybe picking up and order she'd already placed but she was gone quite awhile. The child was screaming the whole time.

I just froze. I'd never seen anything like that before, and I'm still kicking myself for not acting on it. My mom came out of the store, saw what was going on and reached for her phone to call 911 when the mother came out of the store. My mom yelled at her for leaving her child in the car alone and the mother said, "Haven't you ever seen a tantrum before?" or something like that.

So it's a slightly different situation, maybe not as bad, but still. I would never, never, never leave me child in the car. I'm not judging the women in here who've said they've left them in an emergency but I really cannot see myself doing this. It's something I actually have nightmares about quite a bit.
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#46 of 58 Old 12-18-2008, 05:14 PM
 
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wow- I can't believe she was so "whatever" about the whole thing. I wouldn't do that in the first place, but if I did, I certainly wouldn't say "So?" You'd think she would have at least offered some sort of excuse or said "I don't normally do this kind of thing but today he was pitching a fit not wanting to go in, blah blah blah" Sounds like you definately did the right thing.

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#47 of 58 Old 12-19-2008, 01:09 PM
 
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infant in bucket but with no base, watched mom buckle it in, she took about 30 secs to do it and she had a bundle me on the carseat and somehow routed the belt through there?? There was no way it was properly secured.....It makes me sad/angry when I see situations like that and I never know what to do.
just to point out when Sarah goes in my moms truck she goes in her Graco bucket seat with no base, b/c there are notches on each side of the car seat that the seatbelt goes through. It does take about 30 seconds to buckle that part in, its very secure b/c of the notches. And all you have to do is make sure the top handle is down and against the seat in front, and the seat is in the right angle. Which theres a dial on the side of the seat that if the window is all blue then it is and if theres yellow then the seat needs to be adjusted.
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#48 of 58 Old 12-19-2008, 01:12 PM
 
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but to the OP yea i'm glad you called 911, i would have done the same thing.

I called 911 on a guy on a motorcycle (racing style) that was zipping through traffic and cutting people off and a girl on the back who had to of been under 10 years old. She looked back at us after he cut us off like she knew he had done something wrong. THe dispatcher was very gratful i called him in.
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#49 of 58 Old 12-19-2008, 01:15 PM
 
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If the oldest was 8, I probably would have left them.
:
I might not choose to leave a group of kids with an 8 year old, but I'm not about to call 911 on someone who did. Particularly if the doors were closed.

Probably would still hang around for awhile to see if a parent returned soon.
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#50 of 58 Old 12-19-2008, 06:04 PM
 
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just to point out when Sarah goes in my moms truck she goes in her Graco bucket seat with no base, b/c there are notches on each side of the car seat that the seatbelt goes through. It does take about 30 seconds to buckle that part in, its very secure b/c of the notches. And all you have to do is make sure the top handle is down and against the seat in front, and the seat is in the right angle. Which theres a dial on the side of the seat that if the window is all blue then it is and if theres yellow then the seat needs to be adjusted.
I have also installed an infant seat w/o the base, a graco bucket. You have to make sure that the seatbelt is locked, the seat is in there super tight, can't move more than an inch, etc. You cannot do this in 30 seconds. In a middle seat with lapbelt only, perhaps it can be done in under a minute, but this was a outboard seat with shoulder/lap belt combo. I know from experience it takes a few minutes to get it in there. This woman literally just buckled the belt and got in the front seat. No locking the belt, no tightening it, nothing.

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#51 of 58 Old 12-19-2008, 06:11 PM
 
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Poor kid

I called 911 once after pulling up to a stoplight next to a van with several unbuckled young children and an infant sitting on a man's lap. They needed some serious safety counseling.

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#52 of 58 Old 12-19-2008, 06:22 PM
 
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I'd call in that situation too. Poor kid.
Yeah, I would have called in that case. I hope the police follow up. 9 degrees???? What on earth was she thinking leaving the door open like that. Frostbite, abduction, run over by a car getting out of seat, clearly this woman is not a very caring mother.
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#53 of 58 Old 12-19-2008, 07:03 PM
 
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Thanks everyone. I wouldn't want anyone to call the police or CPS on me because my dd took her socks off in the car on a cold day or because I need to vaccuum, but on the other hand, afterwards dh and I talked about it and we couldn't think of a good enough reason for what was happening, and it seemed so unsafe, that we had to call.

Dh did consider running in the store and yelling that there was a kid freezing in a car with an open door, but decided it was more important to stay with the toddler, who was very upset (he did calm down after dh talked to him).

It occurs to me that maybe he was asleep, and she ran in thinking he wouldn't wake up, but he did, and opened the door, and started crying? I know how much I wouldn't want to wake up my toddler in that situation, but at the same time, it just seems way too dangerous a thing to do. No way would I leave my little one in the car.
Whoa! That's totally weird! I mean, I wouldn't leave even a sleeping kid in the car myself (but I don't own a car, so it's such a weird idea to me)... but with the door open? That's really crazy! I don't think I would have called for a kid in a locked car, just gone in and told the store, asked them to make an announcement that a kid in a [color] car was crying in the parking lot (probably embarrassing enough to keep most people from doing it again, I think). Maybe called if he was still there when I came back out? But with the door open where anyone could come by and take him really easily? Freaky weird! You did the right thing!

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#54 of 58 Old 12-19-2008, 07:10 PM
 
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I have also installed an infant seat w/o the base, a graco bucket. You have to make sure that the seatbelt is locked, the seat is in there super tight, can't move more than an inch, etc. You cannot do this in 30 seconds. In a middle seat with lapbelt only, perhaps it can be done in under a minute, but this was a outboard seat with shoulder/lap belt combo. I know from experience it takes a few minutes to get it in there. This woman literally just buckled the belt and got in the front seat. No locking the belt, no tightening it, nothing.
I think many people don't know how to do those seats properly. It can be done pretty darn fast with practice though. My parents car they leave the little metal clip in the right, tightened place on the shoulder belt, so I put DS car seat in fast fast fast when it's cold. Seat down, kneel in the car seat to get it snug enough to fasten the seat belt. No tightening needed! It takes practice and the clip has to be already on and not messed with though.

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#55 of 58 Old 12-21-2008, 01:30 AM
 
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You know I am very cautious about jumping to call the police or CPS but in this case I think you made the right decision.
Yes, THAT.

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#56 of 58 Old 12-21-2008, 01:38 AM
 
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Her response was: "So?" And then she drove off.
I would say hindsight is perfect in this case. That woman needs a wake-up call, hopefully the police gave it to her. Wish we could find out an update...yes, I am nosy
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#57 of 58 Old 12-21-2008, 02:52 AM
 
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I think it's wonderful that not only did you call 911, but that you and your husband stayed with that little child until his mother came back. She might not have said anything, but hopefully the fact that you were worried will make her think about her actions and take more care of him in the future.
yeah that. Good for you for calling 911!
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#58 of 58 Old 12-22-2008, 04:24 AM
 
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I would say hindsight is perfect in this case. That woman needs a wake-up call, hopefully the police gave it to her. Wish we could find out an update...yes, I am nosy
Many communities keep a police blotter. It's like a log of the police calls made during the week. It may show up in there.

OP, I think calling 911 was definitely appropriate. That woman should be thanking her lucky stars that your DH showed up and not a child abductor. My bio-mom got her 2 youngest taken away because she left them locked in a car in winter while she went into a Wal-Mart. She was still a pretty crappy mother once she got them back a few months later, but she has NEVER left them in a car since. I hope this mom gets a wake-up call too!
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