First of all, let me give you a tiny bit of background on the situation
my husband was recently in a car wreck, and our car was totaled. So no car for us. I do not drive. DD has playgroup three times a week, M,W,&F. Usually, MIL drives us in her '02 Ford Explorer (no lower anchors, just belts). DD is RFing behind the passenger seat (the center lap belt doesn't work well with our seat).
Two to three other children usually accompany us..
--DD is 21mos, around 30lbs, 15" torso, around 36" tall, RFing in a Complete Air.
--Girl Cousin is 19mos, around 25lbs, much shorter than DD.
--Boy Cousin#1 is 14mos, around 30lbs, and way shorter than DD.
--Boy Cousin #2 who occasionally rides is 4 years old, maybe 44" tall and I'd say 40lbs, not sure though.
Here is the seating arrangement. I realize that it is hazardous.
DDs RFing Complete Air is behind the passenger. MIL will only permit Boy Cousin #1's Maxi Cosi Priori (my car seat, actually, lent to him because he'd otherwise be in someone's lap..) to be FFing center. Fine. As long as he's in a seat.. I know I should be pushing for RFing but these people.. anyways. Girl Cousin is in a Cosco Booster that has a harness, this is usually behind the driver, but sometimes on the passenger side in the 3rd row.
Boy cousin #2, when he comes along, is usually either without a seatbelt, or in a seatbelt but with the shoulder strap tucked behind him.
Here are my issues:
-I am not the driver of the car. MIL is. She does not care, nor does anyone listen to me about the safety of their kids- obviously. I am 19 years old, but am clearly thinking more rationally than them- in their 30s.
-All kids but my DD wear coats under their seats.
-No one but my DDs harness is tightned.
-I am 7 months pregnant and don't fit in the back seat to install the cosco booster for Girl Cousin, so her mom insists and doesn't care if it's snug. Even when it's in the 2nd row, she insists on installing it.
-I realized today, when removing her booster from MILs truck, that it is expired. She used it with her first DD, son, and this DD.
-Sometimes Girl Cousin's mom even puts her in her old infant seat, still attatched to the base, and just has the seatbelt go over it.
-Boy Cousin#1 is FFing at 14mos.
-Boy Cousin#2 is not in any kind of restraint and that is against the law not to mention UNSAFE!
There are probably hundreds of more things I can think of.. but anyways, what can I do? NOBODY cares and NO ONE wants to take my opinion seriously because I'm just the 19 year old who thinks she knows better (but really does).
Please.. some advice. If you were me, what would you do?
ETA: Boy Cousin #1 is FFing in a MyRide65.. Which is installed wrong, which he is never buckled into correctly.
Boy Cousin #2 and Girl Cousin are siblings. Only Girl Cousin uses a car seat, the expired one. They also have an older sister, who is very petite and still needs a seat although mom lets her ride in the front seat w/o a seatbelt.
I don't want to explain to my daughter one day, if they ever got in an accident, that her best friends were hurt or worse