At what age is it safe to leave the child unattended in the bathtub? - Page 2 - Mothering Forums
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#31 of 42 Old 01-27-2008, 06:17 PM
 
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for me its when my kids are old enough to sing....(usually five+)
I tell them to sing and if the singing stops I run but our place is tiny

8 might be enough
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#32 of 42 Old 01-27-2008, 10:54 PM
 
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DS just turned 6 in November and we have just now begun letting him bathe by himself with regular check-ins. I couldn't imagine a child as young as a year and a half.

Doula, Wife and mom to A (11/23/01) and O (5/7/09)
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#33 of 42 Old 01-27-2008, 11:16 PM
 
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Well, besides the obvious, other things can happen in a split second too...

...as in tonight, as I sat on the closed toilet, reading, while DS splashed in the tub. I literally looked down for a second, didn't hear a single change in his activity, and when I looked up, there were several *ahem* unauthorized submarines in the water. Thank goodness I was right there and I grabbed him right out of there. I can't even think about it if I had been out of the bathroom doing something else!! YUCK!!! As it is I had to completely scrub down the tub and put all the toys in the dishwasher : but the baby was still relatively unpoo'ed upon thanks to my quick action!
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#34 of 42 Old 01-28-2008, 12:47 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Astoria View Post
Also, in our house, the rule is if someone is more "conservative" by which we mean is scared or worried about the well-being of the child, about any issue, his or her opinion wins.
good policy! child safety and well-being should always trump

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#35 of 42 Old 01-28-2008, 11:24 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Astoria View Post

Also, in our house, the rule is if someone is more "conservative" by which we mean is scared or worried about the well-being of the child, about any issue, his or her opinion wins. ...

Good luck.
Yes, that's our policy too (although I admit I have occasionally sneaked a bit of food to DD in the car if I'm alone with her even though DH worries about it... must work on that). But overall, the conservative person's opinions are respected.

It seems to be somewhat common situation - mothers do seem to be more protective of kids than fathers and get accused of being over-protective. And I suspect that sometimes that's true. But wanting to supervise a 19-month-old in the tub doesn't fall in that category. My DD has slipped a couple of times too and I've managed to grab her quickly. If I wasn't there it could have been nasty (I too have on occasion run out quickly to get a drink etc b/c DD used to not move around at all in the tub - not wise but I did it, but now she's more adventurous, I don't leave the bathroom).

Good for you for standing your ground. 19-month-olds don't need to be independent!

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#36 of 42 Old 01-28-2008, 05:55 PM
 
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Originally Posted by sarbear View Post
My friend left her 3 year old daughter (who could swim, btw) in the tub alone for a few minutes while she went to grab a towel. The little girl had a seizure out of the blue (never had one before), and to make a long story short she almost died. Thankfully, she is alright now, but I always think of this whenever I am tempted to leave ds even for a minute in the tub- you just never know, and it's not worth taking the risk.
But how far do you carry this? My fiance had his first seizure, in the shower, when he was 14. Does that mean that his mom should have been supervising his bathing, still? (Although, she seems to be doing that with his youngest brother, who is 10, and who is still supervised in the bath *eyeroll*.)

I was actually wondering the same thing the other night, strictly out of curiostity. I have to agree that 19 is CLEARLY too young, but in general, I'd have to say it depends on the kid. I would imagine 3-5 for most children.
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#37 of 42 Old 01-28-2008, 06:12 PM
 
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I think I started leaving Corbin alone in the bath for quick runs to get something when he was about that age (19-20 months). I would count the whole time and make sure I checked on him before I got to 20. He never tried to stand up in the bath at that age, and he made lots of noise, so I'd have known to come running if the noises stopped.

I started leaving him basically on his own in there when he was 2.5, I think, around the time we had Simon. I check every few minutes and listen to him talking to himself pretty much continuously. My parents freaked out about this and insisted on standing right nex to him while he was bathing. I was like, "if he's shouting about duckies at the top of his lungs, he's not drowning!"
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#38 of 42 Old 01-28-2008, 06:14 PM
 
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My son is 18 months. I wouldn't leave him in the bath. He still slips occasionally with me there.

I don]'t remember when we started leaving our daughter for brief periods.

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#39 of 42 Old 01-29-2008, 09:43 PM
 
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Another one for 19 months being much, much, much too young to leave alone in a bath for any amount of time. Ours was playing and put her face in the water and inhaled all in a second before we could even grab her and she choked for a good while after we hauled her out. I agree with the poster who said that if DH won't agree, you have to do the bath.
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#40 of 42 Old 01-29-2008, 09:48 PM
 
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DD is 3 (almost 4) and DS is 2.5. I always stay within eye shot of the bath room so that they are in my Direct line of site.
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#41 of 42 Old 01-30-2008, 02:44 PM
 
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DS is a little over three and I leave him in there while I'm in and out doing things. We live in a smallish apt. and I leave the door open. He doesn't stand and our water heater is set so that it can't scald.

Mommy to THREE sweet boys & ONE sweet girl + a newb due in February!  I need a nap. 
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#42 of 42 Old 01-31-2008, 03:43 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Astoria View Post
About the marital conflict, you had an intuition, and he had a different one. But you followed up by asking peers, and possibly researching. He's still basing his on an intuition. Ask him to research the issue of when its safe to leave a baby in a tub alone. Remind him that there are parenting styles and then there are first aid / safety issues that are not opinions.

Also, in our house, the rule is if someone is more "conservative" by which we mean is scared or worried about the well-being of the child, about any issue, his or her opinion wins. So he's nervous about children eating in a moving vehicle because they could choke and you can't reach them, he wins, no eating, even if I don't worry. If I'm nervous about no being alone in the tub, I win, no being alone in the tub. No parent should be in fear for their babies safety in their own house, its no way to live. And he sounds like he really needs some of his choices and private space with the baby affirmed. I hope you can find a different area to do that, rather than a life and death area.

Good luck.

That is a FABULOUS way to compromise on parenting things. I am going to share that with my dh. We have (in the past) argued about things where I think the kids just aren't ready to be as independent and he thinks the opposite.

THANK YOU for explaining that so perfectly.


Oh yes, and 19 months is way too young. My ds is that age and even with one of us right there, he's slipped under the water in a second (silently). I got a sick feeling in my tummy just reading that your little guy is that young. Hugs.

I just recently started leaving my dd who is almost 4 in the tub alone for a few seconds while I go into her room or her brother's room. Both rooms are steps from the bathroom and I can see her the entire time. I keep talking to her the whole time I'm gone. But she's a really well-behaved kid who is quite predictable. I'm not sure how I'll feel when ds is that age...he tends to be a risk taker and I just don't think I'd trust him not to do something silly if I wasn't there, even at almost 4 years old.
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