Are you going to ERF? - Mothering Forums

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Old 04-20-2008, 05:49 AM - Thread Starter
 
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If not why not?

Im taking my CPST class next month and doing a event thing where we will be talking to people about ERFing, I know some of the reasons why people want to turn their kids sooner (and have all the info to counter those reasons!) - just trying to figure out if I missed anything!
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Old 04-20-2008, 10:05 AM
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Have, am, and will continue to do so
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Old 04-20-2008, 10:15 AM
 
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I'm keeping my ds rfing as long as possible too. The most common complaint about rfing amongst my friends is that the kids just scream non-stop and the parents feel like it's a safety hazard to drive while distracted by the screaming baby/toddler. I'm the only one of all my friends who is doing erfing and harnessing my 6.5 yo instead of switching to a booster.
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Old 04-20-2008, 10:35 AM
 
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Other than a medical reason (ive heard of bad reflux), I am curious as to see anyone's reasons "why not". B/C I just don't get it. RF'ing is safer period.

My 27 month old is RF'ing and will be until he reached 35 lbs., the limit of his seat. he will be harnessed until i cant find a seat to harness him in anymore.
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Old 04-20-2008, 12:34 PM
 
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I am ERF but I can tell you reasons that other people have told me it's wrong or stupid LOL
Legs hitting the back seat would be number one. Head hitting the back seat I've heard too. The "fact" that the baby wants to be able to sit forward to see has been something I've been told. Of course there's always the argument that rear facing is pointless or not needed.

Monther of Riley (11), Andrew (4) and Victoria (7 months)
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Old 04-20-2008, 01:07 PM
 
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I'm a huge RF advocate, but I'll toss out one I heard this week.

This is a very educated mom, has kept her ds rf until now. Son is about 20 months.

She turned him around to try it for a long trip AND she's tired of the back of the seat where he sits always being gross from his dirty shoes....

-Angela
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Old 04-20-2008, 02:11 PM
 
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I absolutely plan on RFing until I reach within a pound of the RF limit and then I will turn. I also plan on harnessing as long as possible.

Jenna in love with my DH Jon, loving our 2.5 year old, Caroline Tulip, and expecting another little one in August!
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Old 04-20-2008, 02:16 PM
 
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Originally Posted by alegna View Post
I'm a huge RF advocate, but I'll toss out one I heard this week.

This is a very educated mom, has kept her ds rf until now. Son is about 20 months.

She turned him around to try it for a long trip AND she's tired of the back of the seat where he sits always being gross from his dirty shoes....

-Angela
i do 2 things for that:

1. try to take the shoes after buckling him up and
2. i put a tshirt over my car seat so if his shoes or socks are dirty from playing (lately) it doesnt get teh car seat dirty.

We just bought a new car and I really want the seats to stay clean (well i wan the whole car to stay clean).
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Old 04-20-2008, 04:46 PM
 
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I'm all about ERF but the most common reason I've heard for early FFing is because their legs are scrunched, or parents wanted to be able to see them.
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Old 04-20-2008, 04:49 PM
 
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Let's see, things I've heard:

He wants to watch the DVD player (my son does this rfing btw)
He likes it better ffing
He wants to sit like his older sister (or brother)
He cries and it distracts me
It's hard to get him in when he's rfing
It's hard to hand them things when they're rfing

However none of these things are worth a child's life though. My children like to run through parking lots too, but I don't let them. Evan is 3yrs 4 mos and does get to ride ffing sometimes, but in my van except for rare things, he still rides rfing. Ilana is almost 18 mos and has never been ffing and I don't expect her to for a long time.

Jennifer, LPN and nursing student, Doula, CPST, and VBAC mama x3 to
AJ (5/03), Evan (12/04), Ilana (11/06), Olivia (2/09), and Unity (8/2012)

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Old 04-20-2008, 04:59 PM
 
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my daughter gets very carsick sometimes (we noticed the only times she was still "spitting up" was in the car) and we heard ff may help that. she also gets very anxious in the car (possibly from the car sickness). we tried her out ff for a few days to see if it helped, but it didn't. so we turned her back around. if she was fine foward facing though, i think we would have left her that way.

we have a dvd player too and she can see it fine rear-facing (even in her blvd with the headwings).

eta - dd is 20 months.

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Old 04-20-2008, 06:15 PM
 
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I don't have any kids yet, but I plan to ERF (and HWH).

I'm kind of a safety freak. If there was a molded rearfacing seat for my dog, she'd be in it. As it is, she's in a PetBuckle - which lots of people find very weird. Oh well.

Anyway, the only reason I can think of for not ERFing would be bad reflux. My goddaughter had this very badly and she would choke when she was reclined. She was turned around at a year. It's not perfect, but in this case I think it was the right decision.

I can see not rear facing to the limits of the seat in other certain situations, but I can't see turning before 2. Screaming that was distracting would be one of those situations. This is all hypothetical still though. I haven't had to actually drive with a screaming toddler in my backseat.

Rebecca, CPST, Navy wife to Chris, furmama to Fenway
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Old 04-20-2008, 06:16 PM
 
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Anyway, the only reason I can think of for not ERFing would be bad reflux. My goddaughter had this very badly and she would choke when she was reclined. She was turned around at a year. It's not perfect, but in this case I think it was the right decision.
FWIW it's possible to be quite upright and still rf.

-Angela
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Old 04-20-2008, 06:23 PM
 
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Oh cool, I did not know that. I mean it doesn't do anything for DGD, she's 5 now. But it's still good to know.

How upright are we talking? Like as upright as FF, or is it a certain angle?

Rebecca, CPST, Navy wife to Chris, furmama to Fenway
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Old 04-20-2008, 06:26 PM
 
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I don't have any kids yet, but I plan to ERF (and HWH).

I'm kind of a safety freak. If there was a molded rearfacing seat for my dog, she'd be in it. As it is, she's in a PetBuckle - which lots of people find very weird. Oh well.

Anyway, the only reason I can think of for not ERFing would be bad reflux. My goddaughter had this very badly and she would choke when she was reclined. She was turned around at a year. It's not perfect, but in this case I think it was the right decision.

I can see not rear facing to the limits of the seat in other certain situations, but I can't see turning before 2. Screaming that was distracting would be one of those situations. This is all hypothetical still though. I haven't had to actually drive with a screaming toddler in my backseat.
My DD can't swallow, has to be suctioned, and aspirates her saliva and vomit. And she HAS to be at 45 degrees because of her low tone/poor head control. We don't plan to turn her around because of these issues. We DID break one rule...we have a mirror set up so I can see her and pull over if I need to help her out. We have the seat tethered rf'ing to keep her from rebounding into it.

Even kids with special needs can be rear-facing. You just have to adapt.

And IME, most kids with these issues get *better* with age.

Sorry, I still don't think this a good excuse for turning.
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Old 04-20-2008, 06:50 PM
 
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Sorry, I still don't think this a good excuse for turning.
i'm sure for some people it is though. there are probably *some* kids out there that need to be more upright than you can get with a rf carseat or who aren't able to get a good mirror set up safely. obviously it would not be a good excuse for you, but certainly there are people with similar problems that benefit more from ff.

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Old 04-20-2008, 07:10 PM
 
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i'm sure for some people it is though. there are probably *some* kids out there that need to be more upright than you can get with a rf carseat or who aren't able to get a good mirror set up safely. obviously it would not be a good excuse for you, but certainly there are people with similar problems that benefit more from ff.
My point was, my DD has an extremely severe condition, much more severe than just reflux. She literally aspirates everytime she tries to swallow. People who turn for reflux usually do keep them rf'ing for a while, even for a year, but then turn. I want to know why they dealt with it before a year, but after a year they feel it's just too risky?

Sorry, I still think it's just an excuse and there are ways to get around it.
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Old 04-20-2008, 07:13 PM
 
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Our oldest rear faced to 34 months. We had no issues with rear facing, but we had to replace our carseats after an accident, and it made more financial sense to buy larger seats. With the new seats, we could only fit one rear facing in our car, so the oldest got turned. She was about 28 pounds, only two pounds short of the limit for her seat.

Our middle child is rear facing now, and she will be turned due to space constraints as well. We can get three Radians into our backseat, but we can only fit one RF, and that will go to the baby. So DD2 will be about 27 pounds and 32 months when she gets turned.

What I find strange about all of this is that it's no secret that RF is safer... for everybody. When trains crash the rear facing passengers generally fair better than the forward facing ones. There have been experiments with rear facing seats on school buses, but there were problems with carsickness (in older children) and larger, day to day safety issues with the driver not being able to see what the kids were doing.


It's the same thing with keeping a child in a 5pt harness as long as possible... fighter pilots and race car drivers wear 5pt harnesses for a reason. After DH was in a minor accident he had some back pain and when he talked to our doctor about it the conversation degraded into a discussion of how 5pt belts are are better, and probably would have stopped the lateral movement that caused the back pain... but people find 3pt belts more comfortable and convenient.

Julie - Mom to Elizabeth (Libby) age 6, Penelope (Penny) age 5, Elliott age 29 months, and Oscar who is 1 year old!
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Old 04-20-2008, 08:51 PM
 
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We RF, but the most common reason is that 'it's easier' is what I hear.

Or the "I trust God' which totally drives me nuts. As if I'm less of a Christian because I RF my DD... I tell them that I don't completely believe we were designed to be going 30+ mph so I'm going to go ahead and use my knowledge of physics to keep my child safe.
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Old 04-20-2008, 11:13 PM
 
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I didn't ERF with my boys because I honestly didn't know any better. Nobody told tell me that it was much safer and I didn't know anyone in person who did. Since the law stated 1 yr and 20# I figured it was safe, no mention of internal decapitation, ever. I have learned about ERF by reading messageboards like these. I wish pedis would recommend ERF or that it would be mentioned in the news, baby shows etc. DD is getting her Radian soon and she will ERF, because now I know better.

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Old 04-21-2008, 12:54 AM
 
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Old 04-21-2008, 01:11 AM
 
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The most common complaint about rfing amongst my friends is that the kids just scream non-stop and the parents feel like it's a safety hazard to drive while distracted by the screaming baby/toddler.
This was my reason for turning DD around when she turned one. She would get just hysterical when RF, and I could not concentrate on driving.

Well, DD is 3 now but only 26 lbs., so when I had to buy her a new carseat, I decided (on the advice of some MDC moms) to install it RF. I didn't expect this to go over well, but DD LOVES her new carseat and has never once complained about being RF! So, OP, you might let parents know that even if they think they have to turn the child around FF for some reason, it IS possible to return to RF later.

As for dirty seatbacks, I bought a pair of plastic seatback protectors from One Step Ahead and attached one to the seat FRONT where DD places her feet. She likes having a seatback protector like her big brother (6 1/2 and harnessed in a Husky).
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Old 04-21-2008, 01:44 AM
 
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I can agree with some of these. my DD2 is 18m and still RFing, but I did turn her recently for a trip. It was a nightmare with a different car then our's, we normally drive a minivan and I sit with her, it wasn't possible after 20 miles of her screaming nonstop because I wasn't with her, and several hours to go, we pulled over and flipped her, problem solved.

I won't be flipping her her anytime soon (other then that one time), but I will say, at least for me, it is much easier when they are FFing. Handing them items is easier, my seat back isn't filthy or I don't have a t-shirt hanging of the seat. Taking off their shoes each and every time is just an option for me, it just adds even more time to every stop. I will be glad when DD2 is FFing, but I won't be rushing her along.

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Old 04-21-2008, 01:59 AM
 
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I turned ds#1 ff around 15 or 16 months because consistently, after 15 minutes in the car, he would get really upset and start signing "pain" and pointing to his legs. He was very good at sign language, so I had no doubt his legs were hurting him that way. I do have abnormally large and tall kiddos who must have gotten some weird recessive gene in the family! I wish I'd thought to try turning him back around when he was older to see if he did better, but he has been ff since then (he would have outgrown his seat by weight around 2 anyways). He actually has asked me to ride backwards since his little brother (9 months) does, but he's too heavy. Now if only the Radian would get certified to 40lbs rfing!

DS#2 will stay rfing as long as I can manage to keep him that way. He's only 9 months, so he has a long ways to go!

Happily married to my dh, mama to ds1 (01/2005), ds2 (07/2007)  and dd (07/2009).
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Old 04-21-2008, 11:32 AM
 
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We did not the first time, because I didn't know any better. I will probably have to fight DH on it as well. The reasons he wanted to turn as soon as we legally could (1year + 20 pounds) was that she was not entertained facing backwards and was getting very fussy about it. Once we turned her forward, she was happy and there was no going back to the other way. I am hoping that next time the next child will be entertained by his/her older sister and we can keep him/her rear facing for longer.
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Old 04-21-2008, 12:18 PM
 
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With my 6 year old dd I had never heard of ERFing. She was actually turned a couple weeks before she was a year old which stopped the puking every time we drove more then a couple miles. My 2.5 year old was rfing until around 22 months when he was close to the limits of his Scenera for rfing. As I didn't know when I would be able to weigh him again and he was close to the height limit as well I turned his seat ffing. I'll keep our newborn rfing to the limits of the seat like I did with ds1. He is currently in a snugride which I expect him to outgrow by 6 months when he'll move to the Scenera to stay rfing as long as possible.

Kristina mom to A 1/12 J 11/05 D 4/08 and tiny dude in late April 2010
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Old 04-21-2008, 03:58 PM
 
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My DS is 16mos and still RF and will be RF until he hits 30lbs (unless Canada comes out with a seat that can RF to 33-35 lbs, in which case I will be buying one of those for the extra lbs). DD was turned at 20lbs because I didn't know any better. She currently rides in a booster and if there was a seat up here that could keep her harnessed, she'd be harnessed!
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Old 04-22-2008, 09:56 AM
 
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My friend FF her son at 11 mos because she was concerned about his "social" development, because her ped. said it was okay, and because she has a minivan, which is so much "safer" than my car that it renders the RF reasoning irrelevant.

And nothing I can do or say will convince her otherwise, because of the whole "doctor says to do it" thing.
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Old 04-22-2008, 07:06 PM
 
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My son just turned 1, and he just went to forward facing (don't shoot..). He's 30lbs and 34". If he was smaller, and was still within the weight limit, he'd still be backwards. His legs were smushed, but he didn't care. He never minded being rear facing, so that wasn't the issue either. Who knew I was going to have a little linebacker
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Old 04-22-2008, 07:16 PM
 
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I didn't with DS as I did not know better, but DD is tiny and will be RF for quite awhile. She is 2y7m, and maybe 21 lb. I think she is one of those kids who will be under the weight/height limits for RF till she is 5 in her seat (Decathlon)! Since she is so little, I feel better about her staying RF. As she grows older and bigger, we will reevaluate, but for now, she is happy, she LIKES being able to have her soft toys right there in front of her (FF they would fall off the seat!) and it is easier for her to talk to her big brother who is FF in his Marathon at age 5.

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