The Case Against Circumcision - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

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#61 of 74 Old 10-26-2007, 04:21 AM
 
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For the "locker room" argument... actually, it can come up; guys use urinals to pee.

There's a link over on the The Case Against Circumcision board of a guy's story of restoring his foreskin. He starts off with a short story of being in third grade, and seeing an intact penis for the first time (in the boy's bathroom). He and his friend were teasing the boy, who responded coolly, "Why are you laughing? I'm not the one with half my d**k cut off." Zipped up, walked away.

So, there ya go, give your sons that line if they ever need it ;-).
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#62 of 74 Old 10-26-2007, 08:00 AM
 
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In our locker room, we frequently stripped down completely and changed underwear. In fact, girls that didn't change their panties after gym were made fun of (so silly.. ugh!). Not sure if the boys stripped down completely or not, but MANY of them did shower, so..

That said, I spoke with DH about this years ago. He said what Jessica said above.. he said that if a guy were to notice another guys penis, that the first guy who noticed would be made fun of. He said he never looked at other guys, as he just wasn't interested and he was too busy changing his own clothes and making it to his next class.

I don't know. Even if my boys were going to be made fun of in the locker room, I'd still prefer not to circ them. I don't want them made fun of, but I'd rather they keep their penis' intact. As I genuinely feel that later on, even if they never say it to myself or DH, they'll be thankful we didn't cut anything off. I know now that DH has researched this (well, five years ago when we found out we were having twin boys) - he wishes his Mom hadn't circ'd him in the first place.

At least if my boys want to be circ'd later on for whatever reason, they can have it done. But getting their skin back, while restoration is possible, it's easier to just not be circ'd to begin with, kwim? And of course, the main MDC line about circ'ing, which I agree with - it's not my penis to do with as I please. So why should I, even as their Mother, get to choose if such a drastic thing is done? It should be up to them when they are old enough to make such a decision.

And now that I've rambled....
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#63 of 74 Old 10-28-2007, 05:01 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Ironica View Post
). He and his friend were teasing the boy, who responded coolly, "Why are you laughing? I'm not the one with half my d**k cut off." Zipped up, walked away.
and yet for the cut boy

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#64 of 74 Old 10-28-2007, 05:15 PM
 
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I am not in your DDC but this thread made me want to relate DP and I's conversation about circ.
I have a son from a previous relationship who is intact but dp is cut.
"If we have a boy do you want to circumcise?"
"Maybe, we will have to see."
"We are not paying $300 to take off a piece of our child's body. Its there for a reason."
"Sounds good...that way he can be like his brother"
I my p!

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#65 of 74 Old 10-28-2007, 07:07 PM
 
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I think the locker room roles will be reversed with this upcoming generation.
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#66 of 74 Old 10-28-2007, 08:50 PM
 
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I think the locker room roles will be reversed with this upcoming generation.
I agree! In Canada in 2005 only 9.2% of boys were circumcised according to the Canadian Institute of Health Information.

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#67 of 74 Old 12-19-2007, 02:23 AM
 
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carrie! how'd i miss you were due in april? congrats mama! (was searching your posts for a link you'd posted : )

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#68 of 74 Old 12-19-2007, 11:40 AM - Thread Starter
 
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thanks!!

Did you find the link you were searching for?

"Parents are simply trustees; they do not own the bodies of their children"-Norm Cohen  Martial arts instructor intactlact.gifhomebirth.jpgnak.gif and mom to 4: DD1 (1/05) DS (7/06) DD2 (5/08) DD3 (2/11)
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#69 of 74 Old 12-24-2007, 09:57 AM
 
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It seems there's a momma or two in here who have stubborn DH's who are obviously very emotional about the issue. Unless they can get over these emotional hurdles, these guys aren't the type to look at the true facts, logics, and statistics to see how ridiculous circumcision is.

With my own DH, who is usually a VERY logic-minded, facts-based individual, I was never able to carry the conversation beyond the "I want him to look like me" and "He'll be teased" stage. I have all the logical and scientific information at hand in case the subject is brought up again, but because of how things turned out, I doubt that will ever happen.

What I ended up doing (and this might help the aforementioned women) is basically taking the stance that circumcising our son is an action. We're equal partners in this marriage, and if we can't agree on an action, we can't go forward with it. (This is also the reason DS is not vaccinated - we never agreed on anything, so we never did anything.) So I "won" by default. Maybe not the most desirable way to get your way, but the important thing is that DS is indeed intact. And to be honest, I really don't know what DH thinks about it all, but I'm not about to bring it up unless one day the discussion is relevant again.

If that strategy had not worked, my next course of action would have been, "Ok, you want to circumcise. Instead of me trying to talk you out of it, YOU talk ME into it," because that is a much more fair way of doing things. He's an attorney so I hope he would have understood that he had the "burden of proof" in this instance, since his stance was altering what is the default (the natural state of the penis). And I can tell you there's no argument on earth he could have made that would have made me agree to circumcision!

Just had to post in case that might help someone in their anti-circ campaign with their DH.

-Kit
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#70 of 74 Old 01-16-2008, 09:24 PM
 
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Hey OP or who ever knows the answer, how do I respond when asked how do I clean under it (b/c I know to NOT retract the foreskin) , does it self clean?

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#71 of 74 Old 01-16-2008, 09:39 PM
 
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Hey OP or who ever knows the answer, how do I respond when asked how do I clean under it (b/c I know to NOT retract the foreskin) , does it self clean?
Right.. don't clean under the foreskin.
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#72 of 74 Old 01-16-2008, 09:45 PM
 
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Right.. don't clean under the foreskin.
Organic we will have to have a talk about it when you come because DS is going to put up a hell of a fight. He says I am against everything because I am not having my boy in the hospital but a birthing center 2 hours away and I like shopping at health food stores, but I am not against evrything just educated about issues that interest me.

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#73 of 74 Old 01-16-2008, 10:00 PM
 
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Its not your fault he doesn't want to take the initiative to educate himself. I don't get what you are "against" LOL being unhealthy? I dont get it.

We can talk about anything you want to.
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#74 of 74 Old 01-16-2008, 11:52 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hey ishereal! I didnt notice you were in this DDC! congrats! (i am so bad with keeping user names straight!)

Anyway, on cleaning:

The foreskin is fused to the head of the penis at birth and usually remains this way until anywhere from 2 years all the way up through puberty! Every boy is different. But as they naturally discover their penis and play with it in addition to hormones released in the body...the foreskin will come unattached to the glans (the head of the penis).

The process can be slow or fast...some boys take years to become fully retractable.

Basically, YOU do nothing! "clean only what you see" is a good way to remember it. Just wash it like a finger.

Once they are retractable, a simple swish in the water will do (esp before puberty). Kinda think of how you wash your own genitals, and also realize that soaps can cause lots of irritation both for boys and girls.

The idea of the three Rs is popular:

Retract
Rinse
Replace

(replace meaning pull the foreskin back over the glans)

Really this in depth of cleaning isn't needed before puberty, but it's good to get into the habit.


So, in summary:

As infant: wash it like a finger
When he becomes retractable: have him swish it in the water and teach him the 3 Rs when you feel appropriate.



*If by some chance you have one of the rare boys who become retractable early in life (2 or 3 yrs old), simple continue to wash it like a finger and swish in the tub, without fiddling with the foreskin. Keep his hands clean so that he isn't playing with it with dirty hands and look to a warm bath if there is an extra messy diaper. Encourage him to - kind of- *play* with it in the tub and that will be plenty to keep it clean.

"Parents are simply trustees; they do not own the bodies of their children"-Norm Cohen  Martial arts instructor intactlact.gifhomebirth.jpgnak.gif and mom to 4: DD1 (1/05) DS (7/06) DD2 (5/08) DD3 (2/11)
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