Does my doctor know the baby's sex even though I don't? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 17 Old 12-11-2007, 02:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I was reading on another board that the baby's sex is always written in the file, even if the parents choose not to find out -- is that true? I mean, I know there are times when the parents want to find out but the baby doesn't cooperate, so in those cases no one knows, right?

But in cases in which the parents don't want to find out (like with me and DH), do the techs look anyway and write it in the file? I was watching pretty closely the whole time during my u/s, and although I'm obviously not able to analyze ultrasound scans very well, it really didn't look to me like she even looked between the baby's legs.

Is the person on the other board mistaken, or is there a good chance that my doctor knows the baby's sex?

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#2 of 17 Old 12-11-2007, 02:59 PM
 
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It's almost always recorded in the file. So many parents will call and beg to know afterward, and I think that's why, but they say it's to rule out gender-specific issues if another US is taken and they can't tell the gender then.

Which makes no sense to me, but whatever. Who knows why really.
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#3 of 17 Old 12-11-2007, 03:13 PM
 
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I just can't imagine how they do so well and don't slip up and spill the beans! If I was a provider, I wouldn't want to know-I'd be too scared I'd ruin the surprise!
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#4 of 17 Old 12-11-2007, 03:21 PM
 
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I've heard of a few couples who found out against their wishes because their doctor or his/her staff slipped up. I guess it's written down if they can tell. One woman said she wears a note when she goes into the office announcing she doesn't want to go just to remind everyone!
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#5 of 17 Old 12-11-2007, 03:47 PM
 
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Our midwife told us the gender would NOT be written in our file, so if we wanted to find out, we needed to let the u/s tech know at our u/s.

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#6 of 17 Old 12-11-2007, 08:13 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Alpaca Wacka View Post
I just can't imagine how they do so well and don't slip up and spill the beans! If I was a provider, I wouldn't want to know-I'd be too scared I'd ruin the surprise!
I know -- this is kind of what I'm worried about. I could totally see my doctor flipping through the file and saying, "Oh, you're having a _____, huh? How exciting!" I'm sure they're used to making sure the parents know before saying anything though -- at least I hope so!

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#7 of 17 Old 12-11-2007, 11:15 PM
 
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I really have no idea one way or the other, but at one OB appt last pregnancy I saw an OB that I hadn't seen in a while (large practice, many docs & midwives) he was doing an U/S (I think it was late in my pregnancy and he was confirming that the baby's position) and he asked ME what I was having. I guess it would make sense to have it in the file, but perhaps they try to bury it in the file so it's not too prominent? So the doc would have to search to find it if they had reason?


I dunno. Really, I'm just making stuff up.

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#8 of 17 Old 12-12-2007, 12:34 AM
 
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I saw the sheet the US tech was writing on and it had a spot for gender. I guess the other thing to take into account is that there are differences internally with some structures between the genders ie urethra vs ureters etc. I have no idea if that matters to the providers or not but you would think it might? Who knows...It never affected me as I didn't have the patience to wait and find out
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#9 of 17 Old 12-12-2007, 04:22 PM
 
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Maybe.

My perinatologist's office put it in the report they sent to my OB, for example, though I expect by my next appointment next week the OB will have forgotten what he read last time-they only record it the first time at the u/s they do between 16 and 20 weeks or so. I know the one I had there at 22 weeks didn't include recording the sex in the records-I asked. My OB's office doesn't even put it in the file if the parents don't want to know.

In fact, when I had my OB appointment (which happens in between perinatology appointments) at 19 weeks, the OB asked if I knew what I was having and when I told him that we had decided not to find out he took a look at the computer and purposely stepped to the left to make sure that I couldn't see the screen even by accident because it was recorded on the report from the perinatology office.

I realize that most people don't have as many ultrasounds as I do, and so it's usually a one time thing-we're telling the techs at the perinatologist's office every single time that we don't want to know.
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#10 of 17 Old 12-12-2007, 05:02 PM
 
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My mw asked me what I'm having so that would lead me to think that it was not written down on any report. Since we found out after the tech took all the measurements when the doctor came in I did know and told her. It wasn't a big issue for us either way.

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#11 of 17 Old 12-12-2007, 05:05 PM
 
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It was written on our u/s report. I asked the tech and she said it would be there for my m/w even if I didn't want to know.

My m/w however said that's the first time she's seen it on a u/s report (she doesn't go through that hospital for u/s, I chose it)

Dawn, mama to D (3.06) & N (9.07) C (11.09) & Still-in-shock surprise due in Aug!
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#12 of 17 Old 12-12-2007, 09:22 PM
 
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at the hospital we used during our last pregnancy, they do NOT put the sex in the report. i kept seeing "F" on the report and thinking they had goofed, but that was MY sex my midwife told me at the time that they never put it in. they are busy looking at the systems, fluid, ect, and gender isn't necessarily relevant, i suppose.
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#13 of 17 Old 12-15-2007, 04:58 AM
 
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My OB from first pregnancy recorded it and put it on the corner of the sheet for that day and turned the corner over so it wasn't readily seen, but could be found in the file. I knew DS was a boy though, 'cause I recognized a lot more than I thought I would. I used to watch ultrasounds a lot when I worked in the ER. I just never thought I had picked up that much from watching.

This baby, we're with a midwife who doesn't usually have an ultrasound done. We're going down and getting an elective done and will find out gender 'cause I think it's a boy and need to get my head adjusted if it is not.

We'll see.

Jen D.

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#14 of 17 Old 12-15-2007, 05:10 AM
 
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.
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#15 of 17 Old 12-15-2007, 06:58 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by applejuice View Post
Of course that is recorded in the files. It is a result of a test and it is recorded. If you don't know that ask for your records at the end of the pregnancy and see.
Er ... thanks for your bizarrely irritable answer to my simple question ...

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#16 of 17 Old 12-15-2007, 07:42 PM
 
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We had a perinatologist for our ultrasound and she asked us at the end of it if we were absolutely sure we didn't want to know the genders because she wouldn't remember the next time we come in and as the babies get bigger, it gets crowded in there and harder to see (we found out that day we were having twins). So that doesn't sound to me like she was writing it down in our file anywhere.

This is my third pregnancy and we didn't find out with our other two either. The ultrasounds were done by techs for both of those pregnancies and my OB was just as surprised by what we had as we were. So I'm pretty sure the techs didn't pass that info on to her.
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#17 of 17 Old 12-16-2007, 12:00 AM
 
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I hope they don't include it in the reports to my MW. I get copies of absolutely everything and they are updated at every visit.

Mom to 3 girls, and someone new coming June '11
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