I can't do 'life'! - Mothering Forums

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Old 10-30-2007, 10:23 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I can't get off my buns to cook, help, care for anyone - after noon, I am useless! My DH just left today to go 2 states away (his Grandpa is dying) and will be gone for a subjective amount of time... none of our local family or friends know I'm pg so I'm totally alone and SO needing help! : I feel ICKY, don't want to cook, don't want to eat, want to sleep and neeeeeeeed my DH. I really didn't want him to go, but he needed to and I wanted him to go. But oh man, I feel like crying now that he's gone.

I don't now how I'm going to do this...

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Old 10-30-2007, 10:54 PM
 
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I feel your pain! I am useless too. Every single dish in the house was dirty for the last 3 days until dh after working tons of hours this week, just cleaned them all for me because I couldn't look at them without feeling nauseaus. Hang in there mama. Get a movie for the kids and go to subway for dinner tomorrow or order pizza. You'll make it!
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Old 10-30-2007, 11:26 PM
 
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Amen. Luckily I've had a burst of energy here and there over the last few days (I'm hoping that's not a bad sign ) and have actually done a few loads of dishes and laundry. Even thawed chicken for dinner tonight. Granted, I'm going to make the hubby make it, but still. I'm still not looking forward to his busy season of out-of-town jaunts for work now. : At least we should get a decent bonus out of the deal.

If you feel like driving, you can always come over and be miserable with me. With our wood stove it's always warm (my mom calls it perpetual summer when she visits)... now it's about 77* with a dying fire, down from 82* in the middle of the day.

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(If you're curious, 2003, 2006, 2008, 2010, and yes, it's a busy house)
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Old 10-31-2007, 01:55 AM
 
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{{hugs}}
I'm with you. For me it's not an energy issue as much as a nausea issue. You must be so exhausted with 3 kids, though; I can barely keep up with my toddler.
My apartment is a disaster area. There are huge piles of laundry I intended to do today but which did not get done. DS has no clean pants to wear tomorrow (wait, neither do I!). The dishes haven't been done. And cooking? Yeah right.

I'm just praying that this nausea goes away within a few weeks, because it's so totally not fun. And it's not fun to have to be an adult and suck it up and be responsible when you feel sick all the time!
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Old 10-31-2007, 03:37 AM
 
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I hear you! My dh isn't out of town, but he is sick which might be worse! The most annoying thing is that our house is on the market and it is SO hard to keep up with the cleaning!
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Old 10-31-2007, 03:54 AM
 
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Awww BIG Hugs!!

I'm still ok for the majority of the time, but judging by the amount of dishes in my sink I can tell things are going down hill... I'm PRAYING that it stays at this level and doesn't go where it did before... Where I couldn't leave my bed!!

Take care of yourself!!
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Old 10-31-2007, 10:35 AM
 
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My dh was in Boston last week for 3 nights and 4 days. He planned on going to the conference before I found out I was pregnant. Not only was I pregnant, but also VERY sick with an awful cold. It was a tough week, but we coped through it. I made soup early in the day on a day I was feeling "okay" and we had pizza another night. I kept the dishes down as much as possible and ignored the laundry. It went slow, but faster than I thought it would. We're not normally a TV family, but I did let my 2 year old watch Blue's Clues twice. You can do it!
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Old 10-31-2007, 11:27 AM
 
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Oh, mama...

I feel your pain. I'm exhausted, my house is filthy, and dh is going out of town for conferences both of the upcoming weekends. Which, in my mind at least, is so much WORSE than if he were going to be gone during the week. It's like I know during the week that he's not going to be around much, so we're really only missing him in the evenings. But, being gone two weekends in a row means that I'm not getting any break from full-time childcare for almost three weeks. I count on the weekends to be the time where I can take a bath if I want to or when I can let him fix the lunches, etc. I love being a mostly-SAHM, but it is nice to share the responsibility every so often.

Plus, MS is poking its nose in every now and then... Ugh.

I'm thinking that pizza might be part of my weekend survival strategy.... Thank goodness for Trader Joes cheap pizzas!
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Old 10-31-2007, 11:37 AM
 
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I'm with you mama. I can hardly move. I feel like I can't do this. This is rough...... we have no family in the area at all. It stinks. Not that they would help if they were in the area but still. I'm not sure how I will make it to June....
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Old 10-31-2007, 12:58 PM
 
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I'm in exactly the same boat. It's hard. And to top it off, last night I screwed up my neck and I'm in excruciating pain. I can't look or tilt my head to the right. I've never hurt my neck this bad before. My chiropractor isn't open on Wednesdays. The nausea and exhaustion are really wearing on me. I'm tired of being tired and sick of being sick. I'm behind on laundry too and most days I don't even make it out of my pajamas. The end of this trimester can't come soon enough!
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Old 10-31-2007, 01:09 PM
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I haven't been to work in over a week. :
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Old 10-31-2007, 02:10 PM
 
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Glad to hear its not just me. I am feeling so beat - tired and nauseas and don't want to do anything. I'm at work but can't bring myself to do much - i've been on the board for awhile now but even that is tiring me out from all the reading. I really wish I could just curl up in bed all day. Oh well!
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Old 10-31-2007, 02:16 PM
 
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That's a good way to put it, I can't do life. I can't either. I'm in mourning for my former self.

http://www.myspace.com/ladyelms

Midwife apprentice and mama to 6, including three UC babies: Jude River, 06/04/08, Elora Wren Isolde, 9/27/10, and our newest addition, Eilish Neve Isebeul, 6/12/14!
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Old 10-31-2007, 03:05 PM
 
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I seem to be having better luck in this department. Pretty useless in the afternoons, but staying on top of the laundry and I beat up the kitchen after 10 PM at night when I get a little surge.

Dh is on meals right now, though. The smells and the sight of the raw foods...not pretty.

He's been taking the car to work since he aggravated his back injury last week, so I don't have the guilt of not running errands -- no way to run them!

Granted, my kids are a bit older, the four year old is about to be five and a great, helpful girl...and my oldest is very independent and willing to do as much as we'll let him do on his own. It's early dismissal at school today, though...need to get ready for that! We have to make cupcakes this afternoon, hope I can cope!

I don't know WHY this helps me, but whenever someone calls me on the phone, I get busy tidying or cleaning. I like multitasking while I talk, always have.

The only thing that's really getting the shaft around here is the bathroom cleaning.

We are six: Me : Dh : Ds1('00) Dd('02) Ds2('05) Ds3('08) and, wow! Soon to be seven, Dd2 due 4/23.
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Old 10-31-2007, 09:10 PM
 
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I am so glad that I am not ALONE!! Honestly I have NEVER felt so exhausted with any of my previous pregnancies. I could sleep until noon, take a nap in the afternoon and still be ready for bed at 8:00pm. The house is a disaster to put it mildly and the kids are lucky if they get grilled cheese sandwiches for dinner.

To top it off my dh is working out of town, comes home on Saturday night to leave at 4:00am on Monday morning. He is no help at all. I feel more run down after he leaves because he tries to pack it all in in just one day. UGH! I am hoping I get some energy back in a few weeks!
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Old 11-01-2007, 11:19 AM
 
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Hang in there! I know that it sucks right now, but your DH will be back soon right?

I'm really missing my DH. He has been gone since August and won't be back home until mid-December. It is hard not having your best friend around.

Wife, mom to DS (4), DD (2) and baby heart 2.7.13

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Old 11-01-2007, 11:26 AM
 
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Oh - I guess I should add that I have seen him just twice since he has been gone and was lucky enough to get pregnant one of those times. I didn't want you all to think that I was claiming to have a holy conception.

Wife, mom to DS (4), DD (2) and baby heart 2.7.13

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Old 11-01-2007, 02:45 PM
 
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Number 9 - Oh MY!! That makes me feel less tired just thinking about it.
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Old 11-01-2007, 03:36 PM
 
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I seem to always get pregnant when dh has been working out of town. I guess we are just really happy to see each other when he gets home. lol

He is going to be working out of town until we find a house where he is and move.

I might be working on number 9, but trust me, my older girls sure help me a lot, especially right now because I am so exhausted.

Kasey
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Old 11-01-2007, 05:24 PM
 
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Well, with Kasey having eight kids and another on the way, I can hardly complain!

But I just wanted to add that I feel exactly the same as all of you: beyond exhausted, sick of being sick (yet it's only 7 weeks in!) and actually rather down in the dumps. It's like hitting a brick wall. One minute I was myself, and not pregnant, and now all of a sudden it's like I've got a disease, like I'm sick with mononeucleosis and the stomach flu at the same time....

I pray with all my heart that this eases up at the end of the trimester. I know it usually does; let it be true for all of us. We all have jobs and/or kids and of course relationships and selves to tend to; don't you just feel like there should be an unwritten code that absolves pregnant women from having to be "normal"? We can't be normal!! It's a lost cause! The body wants rest and more rest, not work and more work. But alas, we must muddle through and muddle through we will, right?

Strength and courage, women!
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Old 11-01-2007, 05:35 PM
 
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Originally Posted by skg_7 View Post
it's like I've got a disease, like I'm sick with mononeucleosis and the stomach flu at the same time....

IThe body wants rest and more rest, not work and more work.

It bugs me when non-preggers people lose sight of the fact that I AM working, for blankety-blank sake. :

Even when I am sitting still, my body is working... It especially irks me b/c it sometimes feels like if the baby was a tumor, people would get it... But, because there is a spectacular little bean inside me, that this is normal and healthy and thus no big deal, energy wise. Normal and healthy, yes. No impact on mama, NOT even close. There is something growing inside me that takes a lot of energy to make exactly right!

Hmm, I sense four pregnancies worth of rants still swirling around my mind on this subject...
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Old 11-01-2007, 06:38 PM
 
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I have to admit when I saw this thread title before opening it I though you meant you couldn't do a life sentence. OOPS

I think early pregnancy prepares us for what is in store later.
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Old 11-01-2007, 07:15 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Like a life sentence??? That is hillarious! I know it's not what you meant though... but still... funny.

Katherine, I totally laughed at your last line... oh the rants I could have!!

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Old 11-01-2007, 07:40 PM
 
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I am totally useless too. DH is working long hours (military) and going out of town a lot and might even deploy in a couple of months (yet again). I want a maid, chef, cook, and pediatrician Swedish man named Hans to swoop in and take care of us. Oh, and he has to be a masseuse too.
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Old 11-01-2007, 08:04 PM
 
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I want a maid, chef, cook, and pediatrician Swedish man named Hans to swoop in and take care of us. Oh, and he has to be a masseuse too.
Oh, where can I get one? I want one, too!!! Actually, I think I'd prefer a Helga, but other than that... just like to keep the female vibe going around the homestead. So far, we have the men on the run!

And, life sentence? Completely hilarious!

I remember being on bedrest, though... that's what it felt like - a prison sentence. I sincerely hope all the mamas around here sail through our pregnancies without that hanging over anyone's head. Ugh.
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Old 11-01-2007, 09:57 PM
 
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Oh, where can I get one? I want one, too!!! Actually, I think I'd prefer a Helga, but other than that... just like to keep the female vibe going around the homestead. So far, we have the men on the run!

And, life sentence? Completely hilarious!

I remember being on bedrest, though... that's what it felt like - a prison sentence. I sincerely hope all the mamas around here sail through our pregnancies without that hanging over anyone's head. Ugh.
Yeah you are probably right. Why bring a man in to the mix? Maybe one of my gay friends. They are the best. Whatever. It can be a robot for all I care. Just someone to come in, pat me on the head, and say, "it's okay, I am here to help and rub your feet with hot oil." LOL.
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Old 11-02-2007, 11:57 AM
 
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Just checking in again. Ugh. I'm feeling very hormonal this morning and on the verge of tears at everything. 2 year old is sick and has been up three nights. So much for the night weaning we were tryinjg last week. Is anyone else nursing? PAINFUL.
Ok gotta go dd peed on the floor and now they are both making flying leaps across the living room onto the couch and begging for more Halloween candy. Now ds is begging for me to play hockey with him....
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