Why are people so dumb!?? - Mothering Forums

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Old 06-16-2008, 06:12 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm 38.5 weeks along and I've already had TWO people start pestering me about not having the baby yet. Both people HAVE kids...they should know this is the biggest no-no on the PLANET.

I think its so rude, insensitive and STUPID.

I'm not late, so leave me alone!!

I don't even feel overly anxious but damn, I'm going to have to start turning my phone OFF and not go online...

I KNOW from the outside looking in their are just excited, but I have NEVER pestered a pregnant woman like this... and I never will.
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Old 06-16-2008, 07:57 PM
 
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I am right there wiht you! I keep hearing it from all of my neighbors. Due dates are just guesses people! I am impatient and anxious to get this kid out though, so the comments make me more annoyed!

Hang in there! You can't keep the baby in forever.

j
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Old 06-16-2008, 08:20 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Yea, but did you see that special nt he lady that carried her baby for 70+ years!! LOL

I know it wont happen to me, but its happened!
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Old 06-16-2008, 09:05 PM
 
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I'll be 39wks tomorrow and, so far, I'm taking people's comments as excitement. However, if I get to 41 weeks and people are asking "haven't you had that baby yet?!" I might punch someone.

The baby comes when it's ready. Not much mommas can do about it, unless there's a secret I don't know. If so, someone please tell me!
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Old 06-16-2008, 09:08 PM
 
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ugh, yes. i have been skipping church lately : to avoid the comments. i really hate it when they say 'are you ready to pop yet?' um, ew.

but on the other hand, i WISH my phone would ring! it always seems to go dead after 40 weeks everyone is afraid to call.
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Old 06-16-2008, 09:15 PM - Thread Starter
 
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LOL I avoided church too... LOL
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Old 06-16-2008, 09:26 PM
 
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Count me among the church skippers - two weeks in a row now. I've sent the rest of the family along so that no one thinks we're off having the baby.

Have to say, it's been a couple of nice, quiet Sunday mornings. Now if only people would stop calling. Funny thing is, I told everyone that my due date was LATE June (instead of today) and they're STILL impatient for me to give birth! Guess I just must be too huge to believe.
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Old 06-16-2008, 09:28 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Well there goes that idea! I was thnking I should have done that, but I guess you're right! You can't win!
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Old 06-17-2008, 01:01 PM
 
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I'm getting these comments, too. They sure put me in a foul mood yesterday! I was picking up from school and another mother said (why are women who have had children, likely endured the same comments, always the ones to commit the big faux pas???); "Oh, Tracy, you couldn't possibly get any bigger!" She was not even stopping to actually converse w/ me, she just kept walking! : I snapped back, "Oh yes I could, there's 2 weeks left for me to get a LOT bigger."

I wanted to stop her and point out that this is my smallest of all 3 pgs, that I'm actually measuring under right now, and that b/c this is different for me, I'm actually a bit worried, so shut up! But, I didn't. I just gave DS a big hug and a kiss, and said that our baby had a wonderful day growing and growing and getting ready to meet us! And, he grinned. And all was well with the world.
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Old 06-17-2008, 01:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Goodness, what if you were having a bad day!! Why are people so dense!!! Especially mothers!!
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Old 06-17-2008, 02:34 PM
 
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A lady at daycare who just had a baby in March said to me this morning (and this is my LEAST favorite one... it's so dumb!): "So you didn't have the baby yet?"
Um, obviously, no I did not. Leave me alone! I know it's not a real question and it's obvious that I haven't, but I HATE it. Just leave me alone! I'm still here, obviously still pregnant.... I can't answer nicely anymore.... I just half smile/half smirk and say no.

Aubree, wife to a wonderful DH, mom to Colin 12/05, Hudson 6/08, and Gavin, 1/12/11.
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Old 06-17-2008, 03:38 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by butterfly1001 View Post
"So you didn't have the baby yet?"
laughup

seriously, what a bad conversation starter! I hear you about it not even being a real question, but c'mon, ppl. haven't you got anything better?

A simple, "how are you feeling?" or even just "how are you today?" b/c that's the same kind of question you might ask me if I was picking my other kids up and *wasn't* pg. I'm still normal, and somedays I'm busy parenting my other LOs and the baby is just percolating away, not demanding much of my attention.
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Old 06-17-2008, 03:51 PM
 
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A maintenance guy here at the hospital, every time he sees me, just says "You look great!" or "I can't believe you're still going, you're awesome!" or something to that effect. You can tell by the look on his face he's surprised to see me here still, but he has three kids, and must remember what it's like for his wife to be pg. Gotta love him! That's what people need to say!

Aubree, wife to a wonderful DH, mom to Colin 12/05, Hudson 6/08, and Gavin, 1/12/11.
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Old 06-17-2008, 04:41 PM - Thread Starter
 
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There ya go!!
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Old 06-17-2008, 08:11 PM
 
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here's another one...b/c I need more dumb ppl bugging me.

one of the teachers at daycare today actually asked if she could touch my belly!!!!!!WTH???!!!She is always going on about how she can't wait and wants a belly like mine, and she'd be sticking it out for everyone to touch, blah, blah, blah.

I just looked at her, and said..."no. you can't." what is wrong w/ ppl? seriously.
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Old 06-17-2008, 09:42 PM - Thread Starter
 
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LOL

I don't get the facination unlesss its your sister or close girlfriend, but I probably would have let her... Whatever! Weirdos!
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Old 06-18-2008, 04:55 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by butterfly1001 View Post
"So you didn't have the baby yet?"
I've just decided that if someone says this to me, I'm going to look hurt and say, "Yes, I did - do I still look that big?" Just to see the reaction on their face.

Carrie SAHM to Nora Caitlyn (5) and Finnley Dax (2) homebirthing, breastfeeding, babywearing, intactivist, doula mama!         
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Old 06-18-2008, 05:45 PM
 
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Well, I'd like to blame it on chemical and sun exposure.

But it's probably genetic.


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Old 06-18-2008, 06:12 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes View Post
I've just decided that if someone says this to me, I'm going to look hurt and say, "Yes, I did - do I still look that big?" Just to see the reaction on their face.
LOL, I'd LOVE to do that to someone!

Aubree, wife to a wonderful DH, mom to Colin 12/05, Hudson 6/08, and Gavin, 1/12/11.
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Old 06-18-2008, 06:29 PM
 
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This made me think of some stupid movie i watched the other night and the couple is on a bus with a preggo looking woman. The girl of the couple just reaches out and touches the "babybelly" says to the guy, "You've got to feel this!" so the guy also puts his hands on her belly and says, 'i felt it move, when are you due?" the lady looks at them and says, "i'm not pregnant " I think I wet myself!
Really though do you think more people have inductions and never make it to term so those of us that wait on the babe to come when it's ready are real crazy

Mama of 4 all born at home : Mothering
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Old 06-18-2008, 07:00 PM
 
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Honestly, I think I'm just pretty sensitive too - though I AM getting silly comments... but today a really nice lady I already like said, "Wellll..." and that was it (as I was going in for an apt. with her) and I felt myself bristle. SO, I think some of it at this point is me.

However, her comment came after 3 e-mails this morning and 2 phone calls yesterday (those were "just because" which means they were wondering if I'm still pg). What I think is weird is that we'll tell people - we always tell them the same freaking day the baby is born, it's not like someone is going to get missed.

However, with all the bugging, you can be dang sure *I* am going to be *super* picky about when people can come over and see us/the baby - I'm not going to give that time away hardly at all even to our own family...

Everyone can just deal. If they get offended - tough cookies. My family, my baby, my babymoon. I'm gearing myself up now to enforce it...

But they sure aren't helping their case with bugging me. And I've never had it happen before so it's just getting more and more annoying by the day.

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Old 06-19-2008, 10:30 AM
 
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i had to vent here....my neighbor upon being tpold of my non hospital birth-acted like i was going to the hangman's noose. i did alot of quick statistics and wanted to tell her that her 2 c-sections were what i was terrified of but i didn't want her feeling bad about her experiences. and i have to agree that part of my less than exciting summer vacation is avoiding all of the comments, because the more crowded the venue, the more i have to answer for my big bellyu and frankly-like all of you- im tired of it...
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Old 06-19-2008, 11:04 AM
 
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It's funny how different things bother different people.

I do not mind at all when people rub my belly--I kind of like it. It's like sharing a bit of my baby and joy.....I dunno.

But on the other hand, some people wished others would ask "how are you feeling?" or the like. I actually hate that. I always say a cheery, "Good!" But actually, it's not true at all! LOL. I'm always thinking to myself, "Do you really want to know? Well, have a seat honey and I'll tell you. My SPD is killing me and I can hardly walk. My vericose veins in my vulva hurt like **** and I have to sit on an ice pack 10 times a day. My ribs feel bruised. My heartburn is horrible. I'm exhausted. I can't sleep. Blah, blah, blah..........." You think that's what they were asking?

I've finally thought of the perfect answer to "how are you feeling?"

"I'm feeling 8 and a half months pregnant" Enough said, I think!


But.....I AM in total agreement with those who hate the size comments. That gets me.

I think if we can take the high road and say something sweet and rub our own bellies lovingly, then that's great. I try to. But sometimes.........

Dee
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