More than a week in and no babies yet? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 20 Old 07-10-2008, 12:36 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I think we had an induction today so hopefully that baby is out but 9 days in and no announcements yet? Is this unheard of?

ETA:
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so hopefully that baby is out
As in hopefully she's not still in labor. Hopefully her baby was born easily without complication.

Mom of a 7 yr old, 4 yr old, and 1 yr old. Wow. How did that happen?
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#2 of 20 Old 07-10-2008, 12:50 AM
 
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I know....I just cant wait until the first August baby is born.....it looks like I will probably be one of the last since my due date is either August 27 or 29 and I was "overdue" with my last 2
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#3 of 20 Old 07-10-2008, 11:02 AM
 
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I know I had posted almost a week ago thinking I might be the first, due to low amniotic fluid--peeked at my chart yesterday and yup, OB had put 'severe oligohydramnios'-- thought I'd be induced last Saturday, but still hanging on here. Flooding myself with water and rest etc, and all the NSTs, etc, seem to be going well enough that they're letting me continue with careful monitoring every couple days so far. And I'm now 37 weeks today! : I would LOVE to go into labor myself, but we'll see; I'm also happy that I've made it this far!!!!


to all the August mamas, can't wait to hear about the safe arrival of your babes!

ETA: it's saving_grace that was being induced yesterday, waiting to hear that all is well and her baby's arrived!!! Can't wait to hear.
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#4 of 20 Old 07-10-2008, 11:28 AM
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perhaps this is just a peeve of mine. . .but other than medical emergencies that require inductions and what not, why would we be "hoping" for people to give birth early?

afterall, we're not *due* until august. even if it's august 1st, that's still nearly weeks of gestation away!

honestly, don't we want babies to be born at term, when it is healthiest for them to be born (assuming that dates are right and that august is the correct due date)?

afterall, a baby born today may be 37 weeks, which is still technically premie (as 38 weeks begins the "optimal time"--38-42 weeks) and there is plenty of research in the media now about how even 38 and 39 wk babies are premies and may have health troubles.

i understand the excitement of wanting to see our babies, to hold and care for them outside of our bodies, but honestly, isn't it more important to simply be exicted AND patient for the mother and baby's optimal health?

i only ask this because, being 33 weeks, i've been frustrated by so many comments by others. mostly, it's in response to the size of my belly (which isn't that big, but people aren't used to seeing pregnant women), such as "oh, you could go any day now!"

going "any day now" would not be fabulous for my baby. my baby needs many more weeks of growth inside of my body in order to be healthy.

i assume that, for most of us due in august, this is the same case!

so why are we so excited about the idea that someone "should be" having a baby in early-mid july, when not even due until august?

of course, and again, i have no problem with people inducing or going early for health reasons, or if people simply go early.

but i don't wish it on a mama or a baby. being too early causes a lot of health problems for little ones--and the stress of hospital stays, struggles with the med establishment to allow us to AP effectively while in those stays, and so on.

So, i'd rather that our babies just stay inside until they're really ready--until about 40 weeks--which i assume for most of us is at least Aug 1, if not Aug 31!

ok, sorry, just had to say it.
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#5 of 20 Old 07-10-2008, 11:30 AM
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oh, and i can't wait to hear about saving_grace's birth also. i have thought of her and her baby, and i think that she definitely made a great decision for them, and i look forward to hearing about her safe, healthy birth and her happy, healthy baby.
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#6 of 20 Old 07-10-2008, 11:42 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Megan~ View Post
I think we had an induction today so hopefully that baby is out but 9 days in and no announcements yet? Is this unheard of?
As of today we're only 10 days into July, not August!
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#7 of 20 Old 07-10-2008, 11:57 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Women often give birth naturally before their due dates. My first was obviously not on her own schedule but my son was born completely naturally without interference at 37.5 weeks.
There are several women due at the beginning of August that are term.

As well, I'm happy that so far none of us have had premature babies. I orginially thought I was due in July and there were two babies in that DDC born at 25ish weeks gestation They are, thank God, doing well and about to come home.

I'm not encouraging anyone to have their baby early just surprised that there hasn't been a single birth yet. In my other pregnancies there were a few premature births in the DDC I joined and lots of 36 and 37 week births.

I think this might have been taken the wrong way which is pretty easy to do on the internet since we don't "know" each other and there is no intonation or facial expression to help us understand the intent of the "speaker".

Mom of a 7 yr old, 4 yr old, and 1 yr old. Wow. How did that happen?
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#8 of 20 Old 07-10-2008, 12:29 PM
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i simply take issue with the idea that we should have some expectation of people going early, as if that is the norm and/or a good thing for mother's and babies when the evidence suggests otherwise.

and FWIW, i'm particularly peeved by it right now because each day i get 'no baby yet?' followed by a story about their own premature birth and the medical interventions required--as if i should want that or something. each one given with joyous body language and tone.

being only 33 weeks, having been told a story yesterday about a 34 weeker who had to be airlifted away from his mother for a week, and then spent 3 more weeks in the hospital NICU--i'm not to thrilled about the idea of "no baby yet?" for anyone who hasn't yet reached what they consider or feel comfortable with considering "term."

i even find my friend's excited sharing to be an upsetting and rude sharing. as if most of us do not have enough concern for our baby, wanting a safe and healthy birth.

and being a first timer, not knowing when i'll 'go'--i'm hoping for late august sept (40-41 weeks) rather than anything sooner.

so i'm sorry that i don't 'take kindly' to the language used.
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#9 of 20 Old 07-10-2008, 01:18 PM
 
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I have to admit, I was wondering when I saw "no babies yet?" that I thought I was reading the wrong DDC!

Of course, I am not due until Aug 26th, and as a first timer, I expect to go late - maybe early Sept.

I have been taking a pregnancy/birth/baby care class for the last few months with several other women (all first timers) due in August, and we all shared our due dates and when we thought we would give birth. Out of about 20 women, I was the only one who thought I would go on time or late. Every one else assumed they would go early.
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#10 of 20 Old 07-10-2008, 01:19 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by zoebird View Post
i simply take issue with the idea that we should have some expectation of people going early, as if that is the norm and/or a good thing for mother's and babies when the evidence suggests otherwise.
You seem sensitive to the issue but let me point out that is normal and healthy for some infants. Different women carry different lengths. Its not less healthy for a woman to carry for 37 weeks or 42 weeks if that is what is normal for her body.

Mom of a 7 yr old, 4 yr old, and 1 yr old. Wow. How did that happen?
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#11 of 20 Old 07-10-2008, 01:40 PM
 
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Originally Posted by ~Megan~ View Post
I'm not encouraging anyone to have their baby early just surprised that there hasn't been a single birth yet. In my other pregnancies there were a few premature births in the DDC I joined and lots of 36 and 37 week births.
I agree, this is the first DDC I've been in that DIDN'T have a baby born 4 wks or more early. Not that anyone wants to have a premie, just that the odds are that someone will. I believe that the statistic is 1 in 8 births is premature (before 37 wks.) I think it's fabulous that we are all holding on so well to our babies, as there are several of us that have medical concerns that threaten our hope for a full term delivery.

Zoebird, you are right, most people are not used to seeing the various ways a late term woman carries and think she "looks ready to pop" when she may have weeks to go. I also have being hearing those types of comments. Granted, I am carrying bigger this pg than the others, but it still isn't fun to hear. MIL said this weekend "When you reach the point that you feel you just can't stand to be pg anymore, than that means you only have 3 more weeks to go! Ha ha ha!"

I am far from that point. While I am tired, slowing down in activity, feeling sick because baby is still high & pushing on my stomach constantly; I am still not at the point where I feel "sick of being pg." Actually, I never got that way with my boys either & one was born 2 days before his DD and the other was 3 wks early. I'd rather enjoy a natural labor than get to the point that I feel the need to beg for induction because I am "uncomfortable."

Anyway.... my point is that I too am excited to see our births here, but not so excited that I want any of our babies to have premie or preterm complications.

I'm Deborah, mama to Aidan, 11/02, Sean, 9/04 (my T21 SuperBoy), and Eleanor, 8/08.
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#12 of 20 Old 07-10-2008, 02:15 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by zoebird View Post

each day i get 'no baby yet?' followed by a story about their own premature birth and the medical interventions required--as if i should want that or something. each one given with joyous body language and tone.
Don't feel alone on this - two of my coworkers just told me back to back stories of them or their sister losing a baby at 37 weeks and 35 weeks and having to still go through the birth....not exactly what I want to hear right now, thank you very much...:

I also think that the op meant that she was just surprised that no one (except saving_grace) has had a baby yet. I'm also in the Sept. DDC and even that DDC has that two births already. Statistically speaking, the odds of not having someone go early must be huge!

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#13 of 20 Old 07-10-2008, 02:32 PM
 
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I've been surprised by this, too. But that's great.

I started to get the "that baby will be born any day" comments a few weeks ago. It is really surprising to hear the things that a complete stranger will say to you. I just shrug it off and figure that they haven't seen a pregnant lady recently. These comments actually bother me less than the "are you having twins" comments.

Baby Boy 9/08 & Baby Girl 3/11

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#14 of 20 Old 07-10-2008, 03:03 PM
 
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I get "you're still pregnant?!" comments daily. Its frustrating but hey, it happens. It's just that as most of us are approaching that home stretch (past 35 weeks), its likely that someone may deliver anyday. I'm not encouraging anyone to have a premie to "get it over with", but I do listen and take heed what some of the ladies who have had multiple births have to say. Hey, they've been through it, I haven't.

37, 41, 24 weeks...you can deliver anytime and everything be fine.

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#15 of 20 Old 07-10-2008, 03:41 PM
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while i agree that it is normal for some women to go early, it is not "the norm." the norm is that when a woman gives birth early, the baby has problems that require some level of medical attention.

i'm concerned about how the language being used (here, by friends, strangers, etc) affects those women who are struggling with medical issues that may impact their ability to carry to term and the worries that they carry, as well as those of us who do not know if it is normal for us to go early, or if going early is more likely to match the norm.
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#16 of 20 Old 07-10-2008, 03:50 PM
 
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I do think there's been some misinterpretation of the original post and first couple of replies to it-- I said specifically that I "couldn't wait" to hear of the SAFE arrival of August mama's babies. That does NOT mean I want August mamas giving birth prematurely. Far from it. It just means that it is a happy thing to be able to share news of the arrival of a healthy baby, and I look forward to that time, and that sharing between posters here.

And, yes, I am WAY sensitive about this issue right now, so please, please forgive me if I shouldn't be posting this one right now, if it is unhelpful or unfriendly in tone, or creates bad feeling, or just sounds like I am being snippy and oversensitive. Having a hard time biting my tongue, b/c I feel like my good feelings and well wishes (along with the OP) were misinterpreted in a way that is unfathomable to me in my current situation-- because I am facing a highly medicalized and early delivery, and have been fighting my ob to try to stay pg a little longer myself. That is how much I DO value the idea of delivering at a time that is later term, healthy for babe and mom and breastfeeding, and fewer 'routine' medical interventions. I have been biting my nails, worrying but fighting for each couple of days more gestation here, personally. So, no, I don't want an early birth for myself or any other mama here. At the same time, the risk of my staying pg is the death of my fetus, so it is a very difficult choice, each and every day. So please don't tell me I want babies to come early. I really, really don't. I am risking a bit each and every day in service of that value, that goal. I don't think the other posters here do either.

Enough said. I am sorry to hear so many mamas get such insensitive comments and scare stories directed at them. But I don't think anyone here has that intent--I think we're just surprised and happy that we've all held on this long, and looking forward to the time when we are all sharing good and happy news together.
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#17 of 20 Old 07-10-2008, 04:16 PM
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i feel that the language of surprise seems to downplay the very reality that you (and other women with health concerns) experience every day.

not that anyone "wants" you to go, but there's an assumptive process that of course, more women "should have" gone by now when we know that for many of us, this would be a difficult and potentially devastating proposition.

you face that proposition every day--the balance between holding on and getting things underway to deliver safely.

i know that what everyone wants is to celebrate safe, healthy births and babies! i think it's helpful if our language displays that. i know it can be hard to communicate on message boards--or anywhere for that matter based on my own and others IRL experiences with language too.

and i finally felt that it was time for me to speak up about the language used simply because i feel that this is such an important thing for mamas to feel that they are supported in making those difficult decisions when in a medical situation, and also supported for continuing with a pregnancy of normal duration (for them or 'the norm').
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#18 of 20 Old 07-10-2008, 09:16 PM
 
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I understand and feel what everyone is saying but I think we also need to remember that everyone is feeling all kinds of ways and need a forum to let it out. Communication on message boards and things of that sort get misinterpretted all the time. If you feel it is a direct attack or don't like what a specific person is saying, perhaps PMing that person would be a better approach. We certainly don't want people to get upset or turn this into a back and forth. Let's focus on the positive for all.:

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#19 of 20 Old 07-10-2008, 09:58 PM
 
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Let's not forget the women who are meant to think that they are 'late' when their little ones haven't come by a certain time. As a first time pregnant woman I've been reading the stories in other DDCs to get an idea of what may or may not come my way. While I enjoy reading the birth stories, I always find I get stressed out reading the posts from women who have been told that they are 'late' and no longer in the 'norm'. They sound as though they have been such powerful women doing the best for themselves and their babies during the whole pregnancy and now because they are 'late' they feel as though they have become complete failures.

It seems to me that comments and statements from people IRL and on boards such as these give me 'ah-ha' moments and 'oh-no' moments. The trick is acknowledging each moment for what it is and then deciding how to move forward.
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#20 of 20 Old 07-11-2008, 02:57 AM
 
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How many of us are there? 150? And I for one never signed up on that thread, as well as a number of others I've seen. It *is* unusual that not only did we not have any premature births, but no women naturally are birthing at 36-37 weeks. That really is normal for a small percentage of the population, but a big enough one that you'd expect in a community this size at least one woman would fall into that percentage. Just like the occasional woman is going to go past 43 weeks, heathily. Hoping for 41+ weeks is no less restrictive than the medical community's freakout at 40w1d that women are "late." I thought here of all places we were open to the wide, wide variance in normal, healthy birth.
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