My baby didn't make it (sorry, thread didn't come through before) - Mothering Forums
September 2008 > My baby didn't make it (sorry, thread didn't come through before)
freestyler's Avatar freestyler 12:33 AM 02-19-2008
Well, this has been one hard day. I went for my appointment this morning, and had an ultrasound, and the baby is no longer alive. It is only 9 mm, so about 6 1/2 week measurement, and there is no longer a heartbeat.

I have never gone through anything like this before. I just cried all morning, now I just feel numb.

I don't know how many of you remember, but 2 1/2 weeks ago, I had an ultrasound. My OB usually does them early to rule out ectopic, if you've had a lot of abdominal surgeries (and I have.) The embryo at that time measured very small. I was just hoping h/she would still make it! There was a heartbeat before, although it was very faint.

So now, there is a D & C scheduled for Wednesday. I get so incredibly sad and feel so awful when I see a baby right now, or pictures of babies and stuff. Which is dumb, I know, because we have four beautiful healthy children at home. But still, this is so heartbreaking.

I know time will heal this, but I feel so sad. We are going to try for one more in the spring or summer, or whenever my body is ready. On some level I feel afraid, very afraid, that we could be unable to have one last baby. But mostly I just feel sad.

I guess I'm gonna check out of the due date club soon. I'm wishing you all the best, happiest, healthiest and most wonderful pregnancies and births and babies! Stay healthy everyone!!! Hugs to all.

SMR's Avatar SMR 12:37 AM 02-19-2008
oh momma! i'm so sorry for your loss.
truelife's Avatar truelife 12:47 AM 02-19-2008
I am so sorry you and your family are going through this. It is not dumb to experience the heartache you have because you have four other children - this was your baby and was a great loss. I hope you are able to take the time to allow yourself to grieve and heal - hugs to you Mama!
treehugginhippie's Avatar treehugginhippie 12:48 AM 02-19-2008
I'm so sorry
guestmama9920's Avatar guestmama9920 12:50 AM 02-19-2008
I'm sorry. It is very hard I'm sure.

Hope you get back in a DDC soon and the D&C goes well ((Hugs)))
joshs_girl's Avatar joshs_girl 01:25 AM 02-19-2008
I am so so sorry for your loss. I can say that the mamas in the pregnancy and birth loss forum are an amazing source of comfort during this impossible time.

so much love and hugs to you and your family mama.
kerilynn's Avatar kerilynn 02:13 AM 02-19-2008
I am so sorry
I had the same thing happen last March, and as far as I can remember, that was the lowest point of my life thus far. I was depressed for the better part of 6 months
Please don't be afraid to reach out to people. PM me if you ever want to talk
ananas's Avatar ananas 03:38 AM 02-19-2008
I'm not in your DDC, but I'm so very sorry
minmoto2's Avatar minmoto2 09:41 AM 02-19-2008
I am soo very sorry, mama. s
Alcyone's Avatar Alcyone 09:51 AM 02-19-2008
I'm so sorry.
rootsandwings's Avatar rootsandwings 09:56 AM 02-19-2008
so sorry!
Mamax3's Avatar Mamax3 12:16 PM 02-19-2008
I am so sorry.
alyssatuininga's Avatar alyssatuininga 02:02 PM 02-19-2008
So sorry for your loss mama. I had a loss in April last year and I know how hard it can be. I will echo Katherine saying the loss group is amazing. Let yourself grieve mama.
TrippyLongstocking's Avatar TrippyLongstocking 02:03 PM 02-19-2008
aw mama... im so sorry for your loss
i hope the d&c goes alright...sending you some love to get through this:
moderngal's Avatar moderngal 02:45 PM 02-19-2008
Oh no. I'm so sorry, mama.

RunningMama's Avatar RunningMama 02:54 PM 02-19-2008
Oh mama, hugs to you- I am so sorry for your loss...

dimibella's Avatar dimibella 03:02 PM 02-19-2008
I am so sorry
Azryel's Avatar Azryel 03:07 PM 02-19-2008
Oh, I'm sorry. * Jaime
Ilovelife's Avatar Ilovelife 05:39 PM 02-19-2008
I'm so sorry. That is a hard place to be. Try to rest and let time heal you.
ccasanova's Avatar ccasanova 12:54 AM 02-20-2008
I'm so sorry for your loss mama.
freestyler's Avatar freestyler 12:55 AM 02-20-2008
Thank you for your wonderful support and warm thoughts, ladies. It really means a lot. Thank you so much.
Belia's Avatar Belia 01:07 AM 02-20-2008
I'm sorry for your loss, mama.
cristina47454's Avatar cristina47454 12:17 PM 02-20-2008
I wish there was something I could say to give you comfort. I'm so sorry you are going through this.
heide's Avatar heide 04:53 PM 02-20-2008
So so so sorry.
Quaniliaz's Avatar Quaniliaz 05:20 PM 02-20-2008
I'm so sorry for your loss. Take care of yourself during this hard time. I wish you peace.