how are you feeling about your upcoming birthing time? - Mothering Forums
Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 19 Old 08-18-2008, 12:02 PM - Thread Starter
 
ccasanova's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Manifesting my next desire!!!
Posts: 1,509
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I guess I seem to do better when I don't know/don't think about it. Ignorance is bliss kinda thinking I guess. This time around I've been reading The Birth Partner, for DH because he is not a reader, and I planned on either flagging the important pages for him or condensing the reading to a few important points. But reading all that information about how labor goes has got me feeling nervous now. Probably because my other 4 births have been medicated although I had always wanted a natural no pain meds birth but didn't end up getting it for one reason or another. So because this is going to be our last baby, I again wanted a natural no pain meds birth. But the thought of committing myself to no pain meds and going through it, is getting me nervous. Anyone else feeling similar? I've never gone through an entire birth on my own before so I don't know what to expect really. And I think it's the fear of the unknown that is worrying me.
ccasanova is offline  
#2 of 19 Old 08-18-2008, 12:10 PM
 
mommathea's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 899
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
As far as the birth itself, I feel very calm and sereene about it. I know if I can deliver a baby in a 1/2hr total in front of 20 emts, sherifs, and firefighters along the side of the road, I can do just about anything. lol.
I only worry about dh, and midwife being there in time. I know I can do this myself if I need, but we are planning this to be our last baby, and I cannot immagine dh not getting home in time, nad well, with the midwife part, I just want everyihing in order.

Thea, wife to Daniel Homeschooling Momma to 4 beautiful, engergetic children.
mommathea is offline  
#3 of 19 Old 08-18-2008, 12:17 PM
 
PassionateWriter's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 3,790
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
i feel very calm about the birth. i actually cant wait for the day. However, I didnt feel that way w/ my first 3. this is the first birth that i have felt so calm and serene, and i think its b/c i have had 2.5 years to process my first vbac..what went well (most of it) and what did go so well (being coached into pushing and not knowing or having the kudos to just say "NO").

i have been so emerged in natural child birth since my vbac that i feel completely confident that nothing (short of pain) will happen with our birth taht doesnt have at least the same amount of risk to happen in a hospital.

i am also thankful this time that i will have NO restrictions on my birth this time. w/ my VBAC there were regulations my MW had to abide by and i think thats what caused her to coach me into pushing (so many hours after my water broke).

im one of those ppl who cant just "trust birth" as a natural phenomena without first reading all there is out there (not that i have read everything but i have read alot in the last 2.5 years). at one point though, the reading became redundant and i passed over to a point where i now believe that i do trust birth and what will happen will happen and im not scared of it.

I would like to reduce the amount of pain i had last time but honestly, that was really only w/ teh coached pushing which i will NOT have this time, so im hoping that face combined w/ the hypnobirthing is going to give me all the strength i need.
PassionateWriter is offline  
#4 of 19 Old 08-18-2008, 12:50 PM
 
joshs_girl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Houston, TX
Posts: 2,746
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I believe that birth is the most natural thing in the world and it's exactly what our bodies are made to do...buuuuuuuut, I am having a hospital birth and I know that in making that choice, I've brought a lot of additional stress on myself.

So about the birth, I'm feeling excited and very, very womanly and proud of myself, but about the hospital birth, I'm feeling anxious and apprehensive and scared to be honest

kati , wife to josh , mama to j&d (7.31.07) marion (9.18.08), feeder of nanuq and gracie lou
joshs_girl is offline  
#5 of 19 Old 08-18-2008, 02:19 PM
 
boobyfeeder's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 1,350
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I'm planning my second UC, so I'm really looking forward to the birth. I'm one of those people who hate being pregnant, but love giving birth. Last time was the most amazing experience of my life, totally different from my first (hospital, epidural) and I can't wait to do it again.

Mom to DD#1 8/04, nursed 43 months, DD#2 8/06, nursed 21 months and DD#3 9/08, still nursing strong
boobyfeeder is offline  
#6 of 19 Old 08-18-2008, 02:24 PM
 
Alcyone's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 1,115
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by boobyfeeder View Post
I'm one of those people who hate being pregnant, but love giving birth.
Ooo I hope I can say that!
Alcyone is offline  
#7 of 19 Old 08-18-2008, 02:26 PM
 
funfunkyfantastic's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Lynnwood, WA
Posts: 1,685
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I'm mostly just freaking about the fact that my house isn't ready and I haven't had the time or money to do anything about it. Lots of organizing to be done and no time to get it done! Ahh! I also got to hold my friend's newborn this week and started freaking out realizing that I would soon be holding my own. Little shock of reality there...

Rachel lady.gif, in love with my baby girl Abigailenergy.gifborn 9/17/08!
funfunkyfantastic is offline  
#8 of 19 Old 08-18-2008, 02:28 PM
 
PassionateWriter's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 3,790
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by joshs_girl View Post
I believe that birth is the most natural thing in the world and it's exactly what our bodies are made to do...buuuuuuuut, I am having a hospital birth and I know that in making that choice, I've brought a lot of additional stress on myself.

So about the birth, I'm feeling excited and very, very womanly and proud of myself, but about the hospital birth, I'm feeling anxious and apprehensive and scared to be honest
s i hope you are able to get the birth you want.
PassionateWriter is offline  
#9 of 19 Old 08-18-2008, 02:36 PM - Thread Starter
 
ccasanova's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Manifesting my next desire!!!
Posts: 1,509
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by joshs_girl View Post
I believe that birth is the most natural thing in the world and it's exactly what our bodies are made to do...buuuuuuuut, I am having a hospital birth and I know that in making that choice, I've brought a lot of additional stress on myself.

So about the birth, I'm feeling excited and very, very womanly and proud of myself, but about the hospital birth, I'm feeling anxious and apprehensive and scared to be honest
I think this is a big part of why I'm nervous/scared. I chose to have a hospital birth over a HB because of family circumstances. Because of that, I know that I will not have all the extra help that I would have to make my birth as relaxed, hence comfortable, as it could have been. I would have my midwife/doula to tell me just what I will need to hear to reassure me if I need reassurance, I won't have a birthing tub which I've heard does wonders to make a birthing mama more comfortable, I don't know if OB will be comfortable with me moving around and pushing in a different postition other than the standard on your back with legs in stirrups, end of the hospital bed taken off kind of pushing. Even though I *could* maybe be more comfortable squatting or being in a different position.

At the same time, I am super exited about the upcoming birth. Just the thought of being in a birthing time is exiting to me. It always has been with all my pregnancies. The rush of being in labor is so exiting!
ccasanova is offline  
#10 of 19 Old 08-18-2008, 04:22 PM
 
Montse's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Phoenix, AZ
Posts: 415
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I am very excited about the process and am looking forward to it. I have some lingering fear but am doing my hypbirth training so I am hoping my anxieties are mitigated by showtime. I feel I found a nice compromise that makes me 90% comfortable.

The hospital where my midwife has privileges is mother/baby friendly and allows parents to direct the course of the birth. They delay vax, delay cord clamping, encourage rooming-in and have an amazing breastfeeding policy. The birth plan my midwife drafted is consistent with what I wrote, so I'm happy about that. Plus the birthing suites are huge and have a big tub and separate shower room.

The 10% discomfort comes from my midwife telling me things may not go as I'm hoping. I believe my body will come through for me just fine; I want to be encouraged as opposed to her creating expectations of the opposite occurring. I understand things could go awry but I don't want to think that way. For my own peace of mind, I decided to labor at home as much as possible and go to the hospital when it's absolutely necessary.

I like being pregnant; however, I am looking forward to walking normally again and changing sides in bed without requiring a major herculean effort in addition to not having to get up several times each night to pee! I'll be getting up but I get to hold a warm baby girl and that's a far more pleasant prospect IMO!

:
Montse is offline  
#11 of 19 Old 08-18-2008, 04:44 PM
 
Azryel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 624
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Interesting to read all of our different expectations for birthing.

I feel very confident that things will go well. I delivered my other children -- including high-risk monochorionic twins -- at the hospital without any interventions or complications, and feel really good that things will only be even better this time around at home.

BUT... I do, on occasion, get scared of the discomfort. I know I can handle it, that it will pass, that I'll look back on the experience positively, and that it will be awesome to meet my little boy at the end, but I also know it's pretty likely I'm going to have a couple of unpleasant hours in there. I hope being at home helps them pass quickly. Guess I'll see...

* Jaime
Azryel is offline  
#12 of 19 Old 08-18-2008, 05:34 PM
 
Ninnifer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: North West Germany
Posts: 167
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
i am not so worried about the actual birth, it'll be a hospital as we are Uk military in germany we have no choice, but i have had 2x hosp births before and am flexible about it.

what i am slightly worried about is sorting my other 2 DDs with childcare whilst i;m in. due to it being the holidays etc if she comes early i think he might be buggered. plus DH is in england this week. i'm trying to stay lazy lol.
Ninnifer is offline  
#13 of 19 Old 08-18-2008, 05:37 PM
 
stephck's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Santa Cruz, CA
Posts: 278
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
When I start to overthink birth and get myself nervous- I tap into the power of woman. I remind myself women do this every day, all over the world and have for thousands of years. That keeps me strong
stephck is offline  
#14 of 19 Old 08-18-2008, 07:54 PM - Thread Starter
 
ccasanova's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Manifesting my next desire!!!
Posts: 1,509
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by stephck View Post
When I start to overthink birth and get myself nervous- I tap into the power of woman. I remind myself women do this every day, all over the world and have for thousands of years. That keeps me strong
yes, I think of those same things although sometimes I'll catch myself thinking about those discomfort thoughts and have to stop by brain and think about the positives you just mentioned. That and that the mind is much more powerful than the body and that what I expect to happen is what will come to be. So I'm working hard to keep thinking comfort, comfort, comfort!!!
ccasanova is offline  
#15 of 19 Old 08-18-2008, 08:54 PM
 
cellarstella's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: SE Portland, OR (Brooklyn)
Posts: 2,516
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I feel like it's my house that isn't ready! We are getting a dumpster delivered tomorrow so we can clear out all the lath and plaster that has been torn out of the walls that is right now piled in the driveway and side yard. We'll also be throwing out some old mattresses I wouldn't even give away... we may even just keep it around a few extra days so we can throw other things out when we think of it. I'm really looking forward to getting all this junk out of here, especially the ceiling tiles which I'm pretty sure contain asbestos. Then we still need to finish DD1's room... painting and moulding. Once that is done we'll be decluttering all the toys and clothes as they get put in there and we'll probably make some goodwill runs. My energy is dwindling though... it's like I'm silently screaming, does the world realize I have less than 5 weeks until my EDD!??

My biggest fear right now about birth is that my house will be this disaster area that I won't want to be in when I'm laboring. I have this vision of walking over to my neighbor's house... "do you mind if I push my baby out in your bathtub? it's just so much nicer than mine."

I'm doing a UC with a doula present. I only just found a doula. Way too much procrastinating going on around here!

The biggest silly thing I'm looking forward to about the birth is that the pressure will finally be off the bottom of my stomach. This heartburn wears me out more than anything else. But I'm really looking forward to DD meeting her new sibling for the first time .

I'm nervous that I'll panic about the pain like last time, but I have a lot more knowledge and relaxation tools this time, so I'm trying not to let it get the best of me.

I'm a proud mama of two girls! 4/30/06 Madeline, 09/25/08 Amelia
--**I'm here to share my mistakes and learn from yours**--
cellarstella is offline  
#16 of 19 Old 08-18-2008, 09:23 PM
 
Charmie981's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 4,397
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
My process has gone something like this:
1. Complete denial. I'm not pregnant, I'm not having a baby and I will not be in labor at any point (this even though this pregnancy was *very* planned ).
2. Wow, we're going to have a baby in the house. A real, tiny little baby who will be another child to take care of and person to think or and take care of and love on.

And at some point, I'll need to move to step 3. In order to have this tiny little person join our family, my body will go into labor and I'll have to work and hurt and work some more to get him here. I think I'll go there once I get to 37 weeks and I know that we'll stay home and the UC will be a go. Right now it feels kind of up in the air.

I'm excited about a UC. It's not the only choice I had...I have friends with birth experience who would be willing to be here to support me and I could likely have an unlicensed midwife if I wanted. The UC is all that felt right, in the end. I just can't see anyone else being here with us. I worry, though, that in the moment I'll feel differently and wish that someone was here to attend me besides DH. I worry that I won't want him anywhere near me and I'll be all alone and feel trapped. I just don't know...

Charlotte, midwife to some awesome women, wife to Jason, and no longer a mama to all boys S reading.gif('01), A nut.gif ('03) S lol.gif ('08) and L love.gif ('10).
Charmie981 is offline  
#17 of 19 Old 08-18-2008, 11:01 PM
 
JamieFay's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Northern VA
Posts: 265
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I have mixed feelings. I'm super excited because my last two deliveries were induced. I'm most definitely going into labor naturally this time around, and my whole family is excited about "getting the call" that I'm in labor. At the same time, I have no idea how my body reacts on it's own, kwim? I mean, really, I feel like it's my first time. I've labored before, but it's always been hooked up to an IV in a hospital bed. This time around I'm not planning on going to the hospital until I'm in active labor and I'm so nervous about how I'm going to handle it. I'm also nervous because the hospital I'm choosing to give birth in is about 45 minutes away, and what if I go into labor during rush hour and I progress quickly?
It's all so uncertain, but I can't help but to look forward to it all, lol.

Jamie, parenting w/ DH , DS1 (02/04), DD (06/06), DS2 (09/08) and DD2 born 8/04/10 9lb 1 oz
JamieFay is offline  
#18 of 19 Old 08-18-2008, 11:19 PM
 
immamama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Texas
Posts: 745
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I can't wait! I am so lacking in the patience department. I just want my little girl in my arms, healthy and wonderful. This last month is the longest for me always!!
immamama is offline  
#19 of 19 Old 08-18-2008, 11:56 PM
 
maizy's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2003
Posts: 253
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Some apprehension is normal I think. We do ourselves more good if we focus on the positive what if's... Not the negative. I've been writing them down.

What if... I have vivid, active birth, how will I feel after? How will my baby be affected by that positive of a beginning?

What if... I am able to birth in a few short hours? How will I feel? How would it affect my baby?

What if... all my best visions and intentions are relized at the birth of my baby? How will that affect me, my family, my baby?

What if... My 5 yr. old gets to see his mother birthing and being strong and beautiful? How would this affect me, my family, our future.

These are the things I write down and focus on. Of course I too have moments of fear but I keep reminding myself that as a woman I am made to birth. My body knows how to do this... I have the wisdom and strength to do this. Life is full of unknowns we can confront the unknowns only with courage but we draw to us what we focus on and hold in our minds eye.
maizy is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off