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#1 of 34 Old 12-08-2008, 04:43 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Dear Kid.

If you would let me, I dunno, PUT YOU DOWN, for, I dunno, maybe 20 mins or so, just long enough to fix my carrier, I promise, after my carrier is fixed, I can hold you till your little hearts contentment! :

That is all.

Love, Ma.




Add on to this. Yall know it's SOMETHING you want to say to your kid.
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#2 of 34 Old 12-08-2008, 04:56 PM
 
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Nothing to add right this minute, but I'm sure I will in just a bit!

Carrie SAHM to Nora Caitlyn (5) and Finnley Dax (2) homebirthing, breastfeeding, babywearing, intactivist, doula mama!         
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#3 of 34 Old 12-08-2008, 04:58 PM
 
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Dear Precious Sweet Baby,

Mommy would be SO happy and would play with you SO much more if you could be put down for 5 minutes and not cry so that she can go to the bathroom. She promises she will come right back and pick you back up!

Love,
Your Mom who is probably developing kidney stones

P.S. Same goes for preparing lunch. I promise you will get YOUR lunch right after!

SAHM to DD1 9/18/08 DS 6/11/10 DD2 6/21/12 nocirc.gifcd.gifgreenthumb.gifhang.gif 

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#4 of 34 Old 12-08-2008, 05:03 PM
 
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Dear Miss Katherine,

I would be forever indebted to you if you would just start going to bed around, oh, 10pm?? These 2am bedtimes are killing me. Other than that, you're a dream baby. LOVE YOU!

Love,
Mommy

P.S. sorry for all the coffee consumption.

Amy Lynn, Loving wife stillheart.gifand mom to 3 sweethearts. Christopher (8/06), Katherine (10/08), and Matthew (09/11).  2 time VBAC Momma and NCB & BFing advocate.

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#5 of 34 Old 12-08-2008, 05:12 PM
 
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Dear Adelh,

Do you just love getting your diaper changed?!? Is that why you smile and giggle so much when I realize you've just peed AGAIN and it's only been 2 minutes? Do you hold some back just to let it go in the new diaper? Because 4 wet diapers in 10 minutes is a little ridiculous.

But I do love those smiles, so I guess I can't complain too much!

Love you,
Momma

Mama to my Addie Bug wool.gif (10/2008) and angel1.gif (6/2010); nursing student & childbirth educator
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#6 of 34 Old 12-08-2008, 05:22 PM
 
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Dear Calli,

I love you so much and I would really like to complain about your 3 AM bedtime but it is MUCH better than your 6 AM bedtime that you had before.

I would love it if you could stay asleep for more than an hour.....I need some sleep TOO!!!....and daddy's boss is getting a little sick of him sleeping through his alarm and being late for work.

Love you so much Calli Penguin,
Mommy

Jaclyn, Madly in with DH, Scott. Mama to Calli Elizabeth (23 months) & our new little man, Bode Keam (9 weeks).
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#7 of 34 Old 12-08-2008, 05:24 PM
 
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Ooops I have more to say LOL.

Dear Calli,

I love that you are recognizing sounds now but could you not look to see what is going on behind you with my nipple in your mouth?? At least let go. You don't need to try and take me with you.

Love Mommy

Jaclyn, Madly in with DH, Scott. Mama to Calli Elizabeth (23 months) & our new little man, Bode Keam (9 weeks).
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#8 of 34 Old 12-08-2008, 05:40 PM
 
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^ Can I add yours Trimestersdoula? Dh hasn't gotten up with his alarm since she was born... but for some reason he keeps letting it go off! And the squirming around to look at things with the nipple in the mouth... ouch!

Mama to my Addie Bug wool.gif (10/2008) and angel1.gif (6/2010); nursing student & childbirth educator
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#9 of 34 Old 12-08-2008, 05:52 PM
 
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Sweet Eowyn -

Like allibut above, I need to eat sometimes. I don't eat, you don't eat. I know you're not even 7 weeks old, but I don't think this is too difficult a concept to handle.

Under the same category of shouldn't-be-too-difficult - those nipples of mine? They're attached, and I'd like them to stay that way. As above, you need to let go before you pull and writhe away. Also, they're not toys. Why don't you try playing with your ears instead?

Love you,
Momma
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#10 of 34 Old 12-08-2008, 06:05 PM
 
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Dear Ella,
Mommy loves you, but she does not love your puke. Please stop spewing on me. I'm sick of doing laundry and smelling like sour milk. While we're at it, my nipples, those things you get food from, are attached! Please stop looking around while they're in your mouth.

obstruct livery vehicles

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#11 of 34 Old 12-08-2008, 06:06 PM - Thread Starter
 
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:

These are hilarious!

:
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#12 of 34 Old 12-08-2008, 06:07 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Crystal_R View Post
Dear Ella,
Mommy loves you, but she does not love your puke. Please stop spewing on me. I'm sick of doing laundry and smelling like sour milk. While we're at it, my nipples, those things you get food from, are attached! Please stop looking around while they're in your mouth.
Ooo! On that line of thought, Dear Kid.

I'd like to personally thank you for spewing...in my locs (dreadlocks)...... two minutes after I finally coughed up the energy to wash them, since they hadn't been washed since BEFORE YOUR BIRTH . Thanks alot. No. Really.

Love, Ma.
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#13 of 34 Old 12-08-2008, 06:58 PM
 
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Another one:

Dear Katherine,

Please stop with the exploding diapers. I know you need to poop, but it's a little crazy when your poop comes flying out of your diaper and onto your clothes at least twice a day. Ah the wonders of combustion and expulsion! I love you darling, but I hate doing laundry. ((hugs))

Love,
Mommy

Amy Lynn, Loving wife stillheart.gifand mom to 3 sweethearts. Christopher (8/06), Katherine (10/08), and Matthew (09/11).  2 time VBAC Momma and NCB & BFing advocate.

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#14 of 34 Old 12-08-2008, 09:51 PM
 
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My Dear Darling Boy,

Do you know when mommy asks you "Are you done pooping?" three times before I am about to change your diaper? I am not just making conversation. I really do want to know. Please try to understand what I'm saying so that two of your twelve diapers are not dirtied in succession.

Also, sweetheart, if you could take your morning before I need to go pick up your sister from school, I'd really appreciate it. I don't like to move you from moby, to car, to home because it wakes you up.

And one final request, sweetie: Remember the cry you learned/remembered on Thanksgiving while we were driving to Nana & Papa's house? While I was thankful to hear it the day you were born, I do not need you to do that any more. I'll take care of you when you simply fuss, I promise!

Love,

Your Mama
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#15 of 34 Old 12-08-2008, 10:05 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Ok, another one.

Dear little Jelly Roll.

I know Daddy is a pale imitation of me. I know he doesn't have big soft, cushy, milk filled boobs. But, you know? Give him a chance. He's competent enough to hold you for longer than 5 mins. You don't need to start screaming at him for me. Mommy is happier when she's had a bath and isn't stinky. Daddy seems and looks like a big dodo head, and I know he's got these big giant hairy hands that seem to engulf you and everything, but he's kinda fun once you get used to him.

Love,
Ma.
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#16 of 34 Old 12-09-2008, 01:47 AM
 
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Dear sweet baby Iris~
You are such a great kid. I'm so glad I get to be your mom. There is one little issue that we need to chat about though: your hatred of your car seat. Seriously, its the law that you have to ride in the thing...I didn't make the rules.
Let's talk about why you hate it so much because I really don't understand. As far as car seats go you've got it good. Most younger siblings are the recipients of hand-me-downs, including you guessed it, car seats. Liberty traveled in Sebastian's car seat who inherited Harper's car seat after him. You, dear girl, have the honor of riding in a swanky new car seat with the latest in side impact protection, not to mention stylish European design. Heck, your straps even have cushy strap covers! What more do you want? Okay, a mama latte to go but that's not gonna happen with the mama in the driver's seat. Even the mere mention of the words "car" and "seat" send you into hysterics.
Your mama is truly at a loss and tired of always staying home. You are going to have one unhappy mama on your hands if we can't start getting out more...peacefully. Sure, if you are truly hungry or need a clean dipe, then wail away, I'll help you feel better. But if you are screaming simply because you don't like the rear-view, there's not much I can do for you. You'll be forward-facing soon enough!

Love you to pieces,
Your mama

ps...thanks for sleeping in your swing for 3 hours yesterday while I got some work done. I might pass that class after all!

Ashley~certified nurse-midwife mama to 6 little novaxnocirc.gifhomebirth.jpglotbirth.gif loves, including sweet Cordelia Jane born at home waterbirth.jpgon 11/12/10.
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#17 of 34 Old 12-09-2008, 02:01 AM
 
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These are a riot! I'll give mine a go when I'm not NAK'ing.
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#18 of 34 Old 12-09-2008, 03:14 AM
 
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Dear Hazel,

You are the awesomest baby I've ever had and want to put in a special request. Grandma and Nana have been driving me crazy and I thought it would be super neat-o if you could have one of your fantastic blowouts while sitting in their laps. Then... I'd like you to pee all over them so the pooh runs all over their legs and soaks into their clothes. I'm not asking for much as you do this to me on a regular basis.

Love,

Mommy

PS-Don't tell Daddy.
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#19 of 34 Old 12-09-2008, 09:13 AM
 
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im due in march and have a 7 year old but i wanted to join in.. hope you dont mind??

Dear baby.... when mummy lies down that means she needs to rest.. its not an invitation to kick her... when she sits in the uncomfortable position, she is having a wee, THEN is a good time to jump on her bladder, not 5 mins later.....When you can feel things falling on your head thats mummy eating, we need to eat so you can grow big and strong, stretching out and kicking upwards does not help mummy swallow..when you can hear the boy talking to you he wants to feel you moving, its not funny to stop until he walks away and then start again..

Dear Tyler... if you ask me a question and i say i dont know,asking me 20 more times in the next 10 mins isnt gunna helpme magically know the answer.. when i say i am making your tea it means you will be eating soon, dont ask me for something to eat and then complain that you are hungry I AM COOKING IT!!..if you refuse to wear your hat/scarf/gloves/coat when we go out it is not my fault that you get cold.....
_________________

my boobs are eeeevil.................eeevil i tells ya....
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#20 of 34 Old 12-09-2008, 01:08 PM
 
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Originally Posted by mamanurse View Post
Dear Hazel,

You are the awesomest baby I've ever had and want to put in a special request. Grandma and Nana have been driving me crazy and I thought it would be super neat-o if you could have one of your fantastic blowouts while sitting in their laps. Then... I'd like you to pee all over them so the pooh runs all over their legs and soaks into their clothes. I'm not asking for much as you do this to me on a regular basis.

Love,

Mommy

PS-Don't tell Daddy.

Awesome.
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#21 of 34 Old 12-09-2008, 02:08 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Amber Lion View Post
^ Can I add yours Trimestersdoula? Dh hasn't gotten up with his alarm since she was born... but for some reason he keeps letting it go off! And the squirming around to look at things with the nipple in the mouth... ouch!
Haha, go for it!

Jaclyn, Madly in with DH, Scott. Mama to Calli Elizabeth (23 months) & our new little man, Bode Keam (9 weeks).
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#22 of 34 Old 12-09-2008, 03:48 PM
 
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Please, please baby boy could you let me in on your intended sleep schedule for today so I can plan accordingly & maybe actually lie down for a nap when you are sleeping for more than 20 minutes?

Surviving sleep deprivation one day at a time with dd (Oct '11) & ds (Oct '08).

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#23 of 34 Old 12-09-2008, 07:41 PM
 
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Dear Maya,

You are a totally awesome baby, but I do have one teensy request. I'm so, so glad you've decided to cut back your pooping to once a day now. But if you're going to save it all for once a day, is there any possible way you could NOT do it at 3am? That's a lot of poop, and Mommy isn't particularly fond of changing poopy clothes and sheets in the middle of the night. So if we could push your pooping time back to say, 8am, I'd be eternally grateful. Thank you!

Love,
Mommy
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#24 of 34 Old 12-09-2008, 07:56 PM
 
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*Lurker here* - These are fantastic and actually a great reminder to me of what Life with a Newborn was like - I need a refresher so I don't go into shock again when my May babe comes!

DS 12/22/05 and DD 5/24/09
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#25 of 34 Old 12-09-2008, 08:20 PM
 
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Originally Posted by gabysmom617 View Post
Ok, another one.

Dear little Jelly Roll.

I know Daddy is a pale imitation of me. I know he doesn't have big soft, cushy, milk filled boobs. But, you know? Give him a chance. He's competent enough to hold you for longer than 5 mins. You don't need to start screaming at him for me. Mommy is happier when she's had a bath and isn't stinky. Daddy seems and looks like a big dodo head, and I know he's got these big giant hairy hands that seem to engulf you and everything, but he's kinda fun once you get used to him.

Love,
Ma.
Too good, too good!

Quote:
Originally Posted by emamum View Post
im due in march and have a 7 year old but i wanted to join in.. hope you dont mind??

Dear baby.... when mummy lies down that means she needs to rest.. its not an invitation to kick her... when she sits in the uncomfortable position, she is having a wee, THEN is a good time to jump on her bladder, not 5 mins later.....When you can feel things falling on your head thats mummy eating, we need to eat so you can grow big and strong, stretching out and kicking upwards does not help mummy swallow..when you can hear the boy talking to you he wants to feel you moving, its not funny to stop until he walks away and then start again..
Oh, wow, that brings back memories...

Ok, my own.

Dear Nora,
I love you more than anything and you are the cutest baby ever. But, after we spend almost an hour together eating, could you please not spit up the entire contents of your tummy all over my one good nursing shirt? I really need that one to wear outside of the house, and not with spitup stains all over it.

That would make Mama very happy.

I love you Peanut Butter!
Love,
Mama

Carrie SAHM to Nora Caitlyn (5) and Finnley Dax (2) homebirthing, breastfeeding, babywearing, intactivist, doula mama!         
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#26 of 34 Old 12-10-2008, 12:43 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by birthdancedoula View Post
Dear sweet baby Iris~
You are such a great kid. I'm so glad I get to be your mom. There is one little issue that we need to chat about though: your hatred of your car seat. Seriously, its the law that you have to ride in the thing...I didn't make the rules.
Let's talk about why you hate it so much because I really don't understand. As far as car seats go you've got it good. Most younger siblings are the recipients of hand-me-downs, including you guessed it, car seats. Liberty traveled in Sebastian's car seat who inherited Harper's car seat after him. You, dear girl, have the honor of riding in a swanky new car seat with the latest in side impact protection, not to mention stylish European design. Heck, your straps even have cushy strap covers! What more do you want? Okay, a mama latte to go but that's not gonna happen with the mama in the driver's seat. Even the mere mention of the words "car" and "seat" send you into hysterics.
Your mama is truly at a loss and tired of always staying home. You are going to have one unhappy mama on your hands if we can't start getting out more...peacefully. Sure, if you are truly hungry or need a clean dipe, then wail away, I'll help you feel better. But if you are screaming simply because you don't like the rear-view, there's not much I can do for you. You'll be forward-facing soon enough!
Um, can we make this into a petition and all sign it and mail it off to our babes?

Quote:
Originally Posted by mamanurse View Post
Dear Hazel,

You are the awesomest baby I've ever had and want to put in a special request. Grandma and Nana have been driving me crazy and I thought it would be super neat-o if you could have one of your fantastic blowouts while sitting in their laps. Then... I'd like you to pee all over them so the pooh runs all over their legs and soaks into their clothes. I'm not asking for much as you do this to me on a regular basis.

Love,

Mommy

PS-Don't tell Daddy.
This reminds me,

Little Butterball:

I know you're not aware of this, but MIL, your grandma, yeah. She's kinda toxic. Very. We've been avoiding her to keep you and your brother safe. But she finally cornered me up at church to see you. At least she was nice because everyone was there. But it wasn't cool how you smiled at her and no one else there. Not cool at all. Just thought I'd give you a heads up.

Love,
Ma
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#27 of 34 Old 12-10-2008, 10:50 PM
 
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dear little ez,

i am so glad you are part of our life. your mama loves you to death. but...please. the 3am bedtimes are *killing* me. and the 2-3 hrs of piercing screams that precede the bedtime is also rather dreadful. daddy has big bags under his eyes and your poor mama is frazzled.

anyway, lots of love
milk lady.
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#28 of 34 Old 12-10-2008, 11:18 PM
 
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dear little ez,

i am so glad you are part of our life. your mama loves you to death. but...please. the 3am bedtimes are *killing* me. and the 2-3 hrs of piercing screams that precede the bedtime is also rather dreadful. daddy has big bags under his eyes and your poor mama is frazzled.

anyway, lots of love
milk lady.

Can you CC this to Iris, too? She's taken to nightly screams and a later bedtime. Our kiddos are cahoots with each other, huh?

Ashley~certified nurse-midwife mama to 6 little novaxnocirc.gifhomebirth.jpglotbirth.gif loves, including sweet Cordelia Jane born at home waterbirth.jpgon 11/12/10.
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#29 of 34 Old 12-28-2008, 02:21 AM
 
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Dear Hazel,

I love that you are a good sleeper. While it's true that I appreciate you sleep a 6-8 hour stretch every evening, I am completely dissatisfied with the amount of grunting/wiggling/noisemaking you make between the hours of 4am and whenever the hell we get out of bed. It's about to drive me to insanity.

So.... please stop. It's not really a threat and it IS inevitable, but if your extremely loud baby grunting does not cease I will have to put you in the crib upstairs in your room. Yes... that means I'll actually have to get out of bed to nurse your sweetness in the middle of the night and will hear your grunting quietly over the baby monitor. There will be no more late night gazing at me as you fall asleep with your belly full of milk to the tune of Daddy snoring.

Love,

Mommy
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#30 of 34 Old 12-29-2008, 03:41 PM
 
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^ Dude! Addie does that too! What is WITH the grunting?! If I manage to be sleeping thru it Dh always nudges me awake wanting me to feed her : but she's not awake, not hungry, and is just grunting loudly and wiggling in her sleep!

Mama to my Addie Bug wool.gif (10/2008) and angel1.gif (6/2010); nursing student & childbirth educator
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