Postpartum Support Thread - How Are We Doing? - Page 5 - Mothering Forums
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#121 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 03:59 PM
 
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Just checking in - have only skimmed the last page (and nak'ing).

Tara. How frightening; so glad everything is ok.


My milk has been in for a couple of days, and MAN does this baby eat! I keep joking that he's going to outweigh my toddler by the end of the week. He's awake more and more each day, and is just so sweet and mellow (when he's not looking for nursing, that is - then he gets fierce).

A. thinks Mars is hilarious, and loves holding him and talking about bellies and legs and knees and such when we change his diaper. Still a few wrinkles to work out with cosleeping and night nursing two very intent boob-men, but it will come. The transition for A. seems to be smooth otherwise, and thanks to DH we're getting good snuggle time.

Still recovering myself; I have to update my birth story to fill in the scary bits that DH wasn't ready to extend to others yet, but I lost a lot of blood. Seem to be coming back to normal now, thanks to lots of love and care from family and our fantastic midwife. I'm fighting off a wee bit of mastitis, but I'm already on a load of herbs and such to ward off uterine infection that it shouldn't get too far (plus a nursing toddler to help empty everything helps).

to the mamas that need them, and congratulations to the new mamas and babies!

Naptime!
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#122 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 04:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Before I forget, did any of you guys do Hypnobabies? It didn't work for me at all. I distinctly remember being in the throes of labor, and my midwife being like, "Didn't you do the Hypnobabies?" and I shouted back, "Yeah, and it's a bunch of crap!" before getting hit with another massive contraction. She said afterwards that in her experience, it seems to work better for 2nd time moms (or more) b/c they know what they're going to be up against. Any thoughts? Hopefully I can sell the kit now.

Faerieshadow - Sorry your weather isn't as fall like yet. I have to say it is incredibly nice to be able to just throw on a hoodie and cover up the pudge!

Carrie SAHM to Nora Caitlyn (5) and Finnley Dax (2) homebirthing, breastfeeding, babywearing, intactivist, doula mama!         
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#123 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 05:03 PM
 
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Before I forget, did any of you guys do Hypnobabies? It didn't work for me at all. I distinctly remember being in the throes of labor, and my midwife being like, "Didn't you do the Hypnobabies?" and I shouted back, "Yeah, and it's a bunch of crap!" before getting hit with another massive contraction.
We did it with our 2nd and I think I said the exact same thing you did when I was in labor, lol! I labor so vocally and have always been really present during my ctx that getting into even a light hypnotic state was a near impossibility. That said, I have seen it work amazingly well for some mamas I've attended.

It finally feels like fall in NC and I'm ing it!!

Iris still has her cord/placenta attached. I thought for sure we'd have a Lotus Birth today but it looks like it may take more time. Ah well, we're not in any hurry to go anywhere.

Ashley~certified nurse-midwife mama to 6 little novaxnocirc.gifhomebirth.jpglotbirth.gif loves, including sweet Cordelia Jane born at home waterbirth.jpgon 11/12/10.
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#124 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 05:20 PM
 
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Tararae- I'm sorry you had such a scare! I was the same as Babycakes with DS1- I'd kiss him to make sure he was still breathing!

It doesn't hurt exactly to have a BM, but my milk does let down every time I go! It was that way with DS too!

Birthdancedoula- I really can't get my head wrapped around Lotus birthing. Milo's cord stump stank so badly, I was glad it fell off at 9 days! DS1's stump fell off at 5 days, and it stank equally! How is it with the whole cord/placenta?

Babycakes- I totally wish I could have been in a trance for this labor! My first was far easier- if longer. How much do you want for your kit?


That's me today, it's my first day alone with my two boys. Besides the whole PP 'should I be resting or working?' thing, I have a head cold, and so while I want to clean up the house a bit, I really feel like I should sleep! DS1 has already watched too much TV today, but I can't bring myself to care. . . Oy. :

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#125 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 06:10 PM
 
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nak

thanks celeste. dh actually has terrible acid reflux. he takes a couple of natural products that really help. acidophilis and digestive enzymes and it pretty much keeps it at bay. do you think i could take them and it would help/get to her?
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#126 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 06:53 PM
 
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Does my baby not know how much I need sleep?

These past two nights, he does NOT want to sleep. Just eat eat eat. I actually starting supplementing with a formula this afternoon and he is in heaven. My DP will be back in town this evening and will FINALLY arrive to give me some much needed help for a few days. I can not wait.

Tara- I got so scared today. I was in the baby store and Julien started turning bright bright red and crying/sounding like he was choking. I could only think of you at that moment. It was from that moment on that I ended up carrying him in one hand while pushing a big cart (one that even contained his carrier) in the other hand.
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#127 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 07:04 PM
 
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nak

thanks celeste. dh actually has terrible acid reflux. he takes a couple of natural products that really help. acidophilis and digestive enzymes and it pretty much keeps it at bay. do you think i could take them and it would help/get to her?
the acidopholis would, and we she starts solids if its still an issue they have powdered acidopholis for babies and chewables for kids.
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#128 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 07:08 PM
 
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^thanks! I'll go back to my acidophilis then.
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#129 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 08:18 PM
 
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I did hrpnobabies pretty half-a@@ed... just once a week. but I always entered amnesia easily so thought it would work. but I couldnt even get it working during my very earliest ctx, however, i wonder if the suggestins ahead of time helped my labor go easier, it was a very fast easy labor, only 20-30 min of transition was bad.

Mom to DS 5/05 and DD 9/08
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#130 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 08:26 PM
 
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My Mw's gave me info on herbs Momma can take that pass to the baby. Catnip, lavendar, and Chammomile are reccomended as teas, with chammomile being recommended specifically for soothing baby's stomach.

Also, Lemon Balm.

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#131 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 08:30 PM
 
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^thank you. i've got teas with those in it. i'll give it a try!
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#132 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 08:43 PM
 
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Before I forget, did any of you guys do Hypnobabies? It didn't work for me at all. I distinctly remember being in the throes of labor, and my midwife being like, "Didn't you do the Hypnobabies?" and I shouted back, "Yeah, and it's a bunch of crap!" before getting hit with another massive contraction. She said afterwards that in her experience, it seems to work better for 2nd time moms (or more) b/c they know what they're going to be up against. Any thoughts? Hopefully I can sell the kit now.
Yep, and it was a bunch of crap for me too, and I *am* a 2nd time mom! I mean, I was able to get through the contractions, even if the whole 'wave of anesthesia' never did kick in, but then add in IBS cramping, and I was toast. Even my MW totally went against my birth plan and suggested pain control (I'm so glad she did, it made a huge difference in my progression). I'll be selling my kit on eBay, most likely. It definitely DID help me relax and sleep much better during my last trimester, so I'll give it that. But yeah, next time, not going to bother with it.
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#133 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 08:50 PM
 
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I'm not in a very good place right now guys. . .


anybody around?

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#134 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 08:56 PM
 
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I'm not in a very good place right now guys. . .


anybody around?
Hey mama Whats up? You doin' okay?

Jessica, Single Mama to Lailah(4) and Christopher(2)
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#135 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 09:05 PM
 
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I'm around mama. What's up?
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#136 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 09:10 PM
 
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Hard to say really, I just had this wave of sadness, I feel like I've lost my first baby. DS was so strange and rude today, and I felt like he was trying to alienate me. I feel like I don't know him anymore. . . he's only two! I can't have lost my baby already?

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#137 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 09:17 PM
 
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Hard to say really, I just had this wave of sadness, I feel like I've lost my first baby. DS was so strange and rude today, and I felt like he was trying to alienate me. I feel like I don't know him anymore. . . he's only two! I can't have lost my baby already?
I'm so sorry your feeling sad mama. My dd is sort of acting the same too. She is just two months younger then your little one. I am trying to keep in mind that she is still just trying to adjust to the huge change in our family and her way of dealing with things are completely different that what you or I, as adults, would do. It is so hard though, cause she is my baby, and it it so hard to see her being so different, kwim?

Hopefully things will start looking up for you. It is so hard in these first few weeks PP, so many different hormones running around in our bodies. I'm sending you lots of s!!! Feel better mama!

Jessica, Single Mama to Lailah(4) and Christopher(2)
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#138 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 09:18 PM
 
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I don't have any first-hand advice since I don't have any other children. But, keep in mind that he's adjusting and his strange behaviors will probably pass. I can only imagine how hard it must be to see your first baby act so out of character. Is he old/mature enough that you could sit down with him and talk about how he feels? I know that sounds strange for a 2 year old but I think sometimes we forget how intelligent and insightful a toddler can be. If not, maybe set aside a special "Mommy & 1st Baby Time" everyday, just to check in with each other and be affectionate or whatever he needs. Don't be too hard on yourself. Things are changing right now, for everyone.
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#139 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 09:26 PM
 
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It's just that the whole labor/birth process turned out so different than what I wanted. It ended up being 2 nights w/o Momma and Daddy, instead of maybe one, when he'd never done without at least one of us. And he was supposed to be able to come to the birth center, and see the baby and we'd all go home together, instead of going to the hospital, and seeing momma with a new baby, and then having to leave again.


I'm literally sitting here bawling, wondering if I'll ever feel that connection with him again! I know it's just hormones, but I wasn';t ready to stop being 'just henry's momma' it all happened so fast.

I really wish I could rewind and decline the ultrasound, and go into labor spontaneously, with joy instead of fear, and have the birth I really wanted.

Crap. now my nose is running. I'm sorry guys.

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#140 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 09:30 PM
 
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Please don't apologize. You are entitled to anything you're feeling. I just know things will even out and get better.
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#141 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 09:47 PM
 
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Oh mama, this is such a difficult time! I'm sorry you didn't have the birth that you envisioned. Dissapointment is such a hard thing to move past. I understand wanting a certain birth and everything going a completely different direction. Just know you can come here to vent anytime and that things will get better, I promise you! You are a great mama and you will get past this!!

Jessica, Single Mama to Lailah(4) and Christopher(2)
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#142 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 09:59 PM - Thread Starter
 
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It's just that the whole labor/birth process turned out so different than what I wanted. It ended up being 2 nights w/o Momma and Daddy, instead of maybe one, when he'd never done without at least one of us. And he was supposed to be able to come to the birth center, and see the baby and we'd all go home together, instead of going to the hospital, and seeing momma with a new baby, and then having to leave again.


I'm literally sitting here bawling, wondering if I'll ever feel that connection with him again! I know it's just hormones, but I wasn';t ready to stop being 'just henry's momma' it all happened so fast.

I really wish I could rewind and decline the ultrasound, and go into labor spontaneously, with joy instead of fear, and have the birth I really wanted.

Crap. now my nose is running. I'm sorry guys.
Do not apologize. This is a very hard transition for everyone, even when labor goes "as planned". You are still Henry's Mama! You will always be his Mama and he will always be your little boy. Keep that in mind. Sure he may be moody and not himself right now, but he will always be there and you will always be his Mama. You will feel it again. Hormones are a bitch and they really do exist. You have us to talk to whenever you need to.


Carrie SAHM to Nora Caitlyn (5) and Finnley Dax (2) homebirthing, breastfeeding, babywearing, intactivist, doula mama!         
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#143 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 10:13 PM
 
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Thanks guys. . . Milo woke up, and nursed, and DH is here, and put Henry to bed. I'm feeling a bit better.

DH can stay home with me tomorrow, so I may try to take Milo to bed with me, and rest.

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#144 of 366 Old 10-20-2008, 10:24 PM
 
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heidirk:

I'm sorry things are so rough, but I bet if you do get more rest, that will help. This babe is my third one.. so I've gone through the addition of a child to my little family twice now. Yes it does change the dynamics, but you don't 'lose' your love, it's just that things will not be the same, your love though it's grown to include a new one so it's still there must adapt to circumstances. What your going through a lot of us call 'Mommy guilt' .. it's okay and perfectly normal to feel this way, it will get easier.

But yes I feel the pull to be with my older kids when my newest one needs me, and sometimes it's vice versa as my older ones have a higher priority need, and my newest one must wait. Things I try to do with my almost 4 yr old and 2 yr old, is sit on the couch (with baby) and read books, do puzzles, or just snuggle with them. They love to snuggle up with me while babe nurses. They love to have pictures taken with the baby or by themselves. Praising them for big kid behaviour etc.

And when Daddy's home I try to have him take the babe for a little while so I can do some one-on-one (or one on two even lol) time with the older kids. It also gives Daddy a chance to have one on one with the new babe as well.

(((((hugs))))))),
Hang in there.. it will even out eventually.. there will likely always be a bit of a sadness from the change in relationships, but we all adapt and move forward.

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#145 of 366 Old 10-21-2008, 09:41 AM
 
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heidirk I feel that way often with my ds too - it is hard for everyone in the family to adjust to the new dimensions.


So I was wondering, is anyone else ready to start that pp fitness/nutrition thread we talked about? I'm not ready to really get into too much exercise, I just checked yesterday and can still see stitches down there, but ideas on easy things to do while on the mend, as well as maybe ideas on healthy but easy meals to make? (No, I was not good like you mamas who prepared with meals in the freezer, I'm a procrastinator lol.) Truthfully I'm finding my sweet tooth so ridiculously in overdrive right now that it would be helpful to be going this road with everyone else.

Me: married to my :fireman Mama to my littles: Toby 8/04 and Elina 10/08
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#146 of 366 Old 10-21-2008, 10:50 AM
 
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I'd be ready for the PP fitness thread! If only people would stop dropping off desert along with the dinners they're bringing! I'm 'storing' my mom's gazelle for her, and it's been calling to me. I did take a short walk with the boys yesterday, but that didn't work out so well. SO far, I have done Kegels ( right from birth ) and make sure I stand straight with my belly pulled in.


My pubic bone HURTS! Why did it start now?



Feeling a bit better today girls, thanks for your support last night!

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#147 of 366 Old 10-21-2008, 04:56 PM
 
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So I was wondering, is anyone else ready to start that pp fitness/nutrition thread we talked about?
I am soooo ready! I was looking at WW last night and finding some very simple exercises I can do. I am ready to not feel like a cow any more

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Feeling a bit better today girls, thanks for your support last night!
I'm glad that you are feeling a bit better today

Jessica, Single Mama to Lailah(4) and Christopher(2)
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#148 of 366 Old 10-21-2008, 05:43 PM
 
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If only people would stop dropping off desert along with the dinners they're bringing!
omg! tell me about it... we got a new dessert for 8 days straight. i was good though ang froze some and threw some out instead of feeling like i had to finish it off. we ate all the cheesecake though.

i'm still working on the frozen meals i prepared pp plus i've made some other easy meals like spaghetti and grilled cheese and soup.

Carrie - i read the update on your other thread. sorry they couldn't get it done right the first time. hang in there...this is just a season. Choose joy, even when your situation seems scary. Rejoice for what you do have...Nora in your arms and a plentiful supply of milk in your breasts that awaits her. what are you doing during the day.... can you play some up beat music and dance with her around the living room?
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#149 of 366 Old 10-21-2008, 05:52 PM
 
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I'm SO ready for the exercise/nutrition thread! The only thing is that I fear I won't be able to do anything due to a stupid c-section.


Question- how are your babies sleeping? I feel like I'm not sleeping at all because DS is not sleeping. Every night I tend to come out to my couch to sleep comfortably with him after the bed stops working out.

And due to an abrupt need to start taking new medication, I've stopped breastfeeding this morning, but DS seems to be doing well with formula so far. The only problem is that the pain from engorgement and waiting for milk to dry up is beginning. I'm not sure what more to do other than the Cabbage I have on or even how long it will take for the cabbage to dry it up.
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#150 of 366 Old 10-21-2008, 05:56 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Carrie - i read the update on your other thread. sorry they couldn't get it done right the first time. hang in there...this is just a season. Choose joy, even when your situation seems scary. Rejoice for what you do have...Nora in your arms and a plentiful supply of milk in your breasts that awaits her. what are you doing during the day.... can you play some up beat music and dance with her around the living room?
We do dance quite a bit! Today she was/is just extra cranky. Nothing helped, she even cried in the car which has never happened.

Thanks for the advice just the same. I do love her to bits and am so happy she is here.

Carrie SAHM to Nora Caitlyn (5) and Finnley Dax (2) homebirthing, breastfeeding, babywearing, intactivist, doula mama!         
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