I regret the multicultural name... - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 53 Old 12-01-2008, 04:19 PM
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I gave one of my DDs a very ethnic name and I sort of regret it too, because no one can pronounce it! I wish we'd given her an anglo name and then used the ethnic variation as her family nickname. I still think it's a beautiful name though : but it's depressing to hear people butcher it.
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#32 of 53 Old 12-03-2008, 04:44 AM
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Originally Posted by LorenaAZ View Post
Yeah, we are calling the baby (still in utero) Izzy.
Your babe would fit in perfectly here, we have the nicknames Ezzy and Ozi (pronounced Ozzy....I just can't bear to spell it that way!) They are NOT the nicknames I would have chosen but the older kids and dad just started calling them those names, so now I do too
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#33 of 53 Old 12-04-2008, 07:02 PM
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don't worry it will probably change a million times before she's 30 haha my little brother andrew went through about 7 variations before he chose to finally just go by andrew. one of my high school friends went by her middle name (her name was aurora dawn) and as soon as she graduated changed back to dawn...and now my side of the family (hispanic dad/scandanavian mom) calls my husband mika (meekah) but his name is micah (my-cah) and he enjoys it ^_^....names are such a huge part of our identity, and like our personalities, can sometimes change many times before we get it where we want it ^_^

zofia is a beautiful name, and as she grows she'll find ways to make it hers
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#34 of 53 Old 12-07-2008, 04:39 AM
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Originally Posted by TeresaZofia View Post
Thanks for all of the replies. I just feel bad that I'm giving her an identity crisis or something . Or, really, I'm just being a worried mom.
no crisis. i clearly remember the day that my friend's dd announced at age 5 that she no longer wanted to be called sadie which was her mom's nickname for her. it lasted quite a while, but then she went back to sadie. i think they are also working to define themselves. you haven't done anything wrong.

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#35 of 53 Old 12-07-2008, 04:54 AM
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Originally Posted by Bad Mama Jama View Post
no crisis. i clearly remember the day that my friend's dd announced at age 5 that she no longer wanted to be called sadie which was her mom's nickname for her. it lasted quite a while, but then she went back to sadie. i think they are also working to define themselves. you haven't done anything wrong.
i agree!! and you know what? some people do have trouble with names.. but thats ok.. she can correct them. i do it all the time. you should hear me talking on the phone to people...like the doctor or something.. when they ask my name i have to say it spell sign it and morse code it.. but i don't mind i am totally used to it... it do it without even thinking about it. i love my name though.. peoples lack of ability to pronounce it correctly never really phased me.
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#36 of 53 Old 12-11-2008, 02:07 PM
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I think everyone goes through this. While my name isn't common, it isn't that unusual either. For a time I toyed with different spellings, I went by a totally different name. In college, I went by the masculine nickname.
DH was "Charlie" at home untill kindergarten, when he game home, very distressed, and said to hid mother "Did you know my name is Charles?" and he's been that ever since.
#1 son said that when he tirned 7, he wasn't going to be Danny anymore, just Dan but has yet to change over. I'm sure we'll go through the same thing with Malcolm.

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#37 of 53 Old 12-11-2008, 02:40 PM
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Originally Posted by bellydancemommy View Post
I am going with a difficult name for my daughter (due in Jan). Her name will be Anais. Most people I hear from now don't like it. My family included they say they can't pronounce it. My 5 year old and her friends can pronounce it no problem. (AH NA EESE). I'm sure everyone else will figure it out on their own. I'm not worried about it. I am sure we will have our challenges with it as she grows but, hopefully we will be able to deal with them! good luck with your daughter! I think the name is beautiful! robyn
Anais? I would be worried about this one. s (speaking as a former teacher)
I think this name is way too close to anus. I would cringe to hear my child called that!

I'm all for creative/meaningful names but "difficult" names are another story

Homeschooling mama of four fantastic kids and wife to one great guy.
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#38 of 53 Old 12-11-2008, 10:06 PM
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zosia is beautiful name, one of the ladies i worked wiht her name is Zophia (had a Polish dad). so at work she was zophia but to close friends and family she was always Zosia.
as for butchering names, in the area that I live are a lot of ppl from all over the world, especially lot of people from India. Try pronouncing one of those! hehe

single mama to DD 5.09
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#39 of 53 Old 12-11-2008, 10:41 PM
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Originally Posted by Mamato2and2 View Post
Your babe would fit in perfectly here, we have the nicknames Ezzy and Ozi (pronounced Ozzy....I just can't bear to spell it that way!) They are NOT the nicknames I would have chosen but the older kids and dad just started calling them those names, so now I do too
We have an Ezzy here too. His older brother just calls him Ez, though.
I have a co-worker who also calls her son Ezzy... although his given name is different than my ds.
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#40 of 53 Old 12-12-2008, 01:01 AM
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I love the name Zosia, it was the other name I thought of to name dd. I ended up w/ Stella because it was my beloved (Polish) Grandmothers name.
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#41 of 53 Old 12-12-2008, 06:48 AM
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I regret my daughter's name too. It's American, well Irish actually, but we live in Italy. It has a sound that doesn't occur in Italian, and when I tell people what her name is, they usually look confused and repeat what they think I've said. Her name is Kathleen. People look at me and say, "Carlin?" The "th" is very confusing for them. Then I explain again, tell them that it's the equivalent of Caterina. They smile, and say, "Ah, Cathrin!" They get the "th" but not with the "l."

Dh and I discussed this before she was born. We knew this would happen. But we wanted to name her after my mother and just figured that we'd all just deal with the name. I myself have a name that causes problems here, so I knew how frustrating it would be. But now that we're actually dealing with it, I wish we'd changed Kathleen into something easier to pronounce like Catalina. It's too late to change it, as Italian law only allows name changes if the name is embarrassing.

Dd is only about a year old now. It will be interesting to see what she wants to be called when she's older, and what she calls herself. I often call her Kathy, which dh's family repeats as Cati. That doesn't bother me too much. I wonder if that's what she'll prefer. In the end, it will be her choice. I do hope she preserves the "th," though, and as she grows I will emphasize that she has a very special name because it's different and because it was her grandmother's name.

BTW, I love your daughter's name!
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#42 of 53 Old 12-12-2008, 07:30 AM
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The first part of our dd's name is Anna (a pronounced like the first o in lollypop) and it gets pronounced in two different ways, depending on whether the speaker is American or some type of European. Well, actually 3 ways, as I call her AN Na (very clearly two n's in the middle) when I speak my language, dh (native English speaker) calls her "Ana."

Dd (3 yo) responds to all three and does not seem to care. In Finnish she calls herself "An na" and in English "Ana."

Mama to a little lady and always praying for more.
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#43 of 53 Old 12-13-2008, 10:11 AM
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Originally Posted by lolar2 View Post
I know plenty of people who pronounce their names differently depending on what language they are speaking (including me). It's quite common around here, actually.
I agree.

I love the name Zofya and I wouldn't mind having a child with that name and having to correct people on the correct pronunciation. It's a beautiful name.

46-year-old single (divorced), self-employed working, home schooling, mommy to:

19 y-o
12 y-o (private school)
5 y-o (home schooled)
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#44 of 53 Old 12-13-2008, 03:22 PM
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for a period of time in the 2nd and 3rd grade, I insisted on being called "Tom" and then "Steve" . I have an EXTREMELY common and imo boring name, plus I was a huge tom-boy Please don't regret giving your daughter such a gorgeous name. She will surely appreciate it as she grows up and also experiment with it, which I think is a normal and wonderful thing
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#45 of 53 Old 12-13-2008, 07:51 PM
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I can relate ... I knew full well what would happen especially when they started to become more social as they grew up. Fast forward to NOW We're Jewish, and while 3 of my kids don't have terribly uncommon names we've still always had pronunciation and people electing to give them a nick name instead of asking how to say it. We always correct commonly used nick names- I don't have anything in particular against nick names as my 2 yo have several but I don't like the ones that are used for Jaclyn ( Jackie) and Israel ( iz or izzy) No offense to anyone

My oldest dd is named Jaclyn which is NOT jacqueline... we chose the spelling because she's names after my best childhood friend. We opted for the spelling which is derived from Hebrew. We also gave her a Hebrew name which is tradition here in the states, beacause her name sounds very "American" or even mistaken for French when procounced wrong.

Our youngest dd, Na'omi is commonly called Nay or Naee( long i sound) omi. We gave her just the one very traditional Hebrew name and it should sound like Nah ( pause) omi

Our ds Israel... commonly called Izreeul. We don't use the hardcore Hebrew Y'israel unless we're speaking Hebrew but we say the english version of his name as "Israil". Does that make sense in writing?

Javen is uncommon here and in Israel. Although it sounds like the ULTRA common Jayden. He gets called Jayden all the time.

My dh's name is Micah as well as our youngest. One can imagine the multitude of mispronunciations we experience with that name LOL!!! "mihcuh" "meekuh" "Mike" "miCAH" etc.

Me? My name cracks everyone up. Kristie. Can't get that wrong and it's certainly NOT Jewish. I come from a multicultural family too... let's just say my Dad won the battle for my name. Unfortunatly most people call me Kris, which I HATE but have given up on correcting since even my mom does it.

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#46 of 53 Old 12-17-2008, 08:37 PM
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I just saw this thread ... I'm going to be in the same position (once I actually get pregnant, have a baby, lol).

I'm Polish, and if it's a girl we plan to name her Zofia in honor of my great grandmother. I had planned on calling her Zosia, and then have the Americans do whatever they want with her name. Whether it's some mispronounced form of Zosia or just Sophie - either way I'm sure eventually the child will pick which one it likes best.

And, really, I think you can change the variations on the same name as much as you want. In my family, we always put the full name on the birth certificate and, after that, everyone just calls you by whatever form they like or want to use in a given moment.

For instance, my birth certificate name is Katarzyna. My family calls me anything from Kasia, Kaska, Kasienka, Kasiuli, Kasiaczek, Tasiacazek, Kas, and so on. Most of them are transformed into terms of endearment via their pronouncement.

However, I'm used to this - from birth. It seems weird to me to have people only call me by one version of my name, lol. Plus, then I have to factor in the Americans who have problems pronouncing my name. So, it goes through all kinds of pronounciations depending on who is speaking.

As far as your child being confused ... this will pass. My partner only speaks English, I speak both English and Polish. I want my kids to know Polish, so the plan is that I will only speak Polish to them, my partner English. And then they will spend summers in Poland with family (and us obviously).

I read that kids who are raised with 2 languages at the same time go through either a period of confusion or of delayed speaking. But, this is normal and does pass.

Polish was my first language, and then when I was 5 I moved to America and had to learn English. I stopped speaking for an entire year! However, (obviously) this passed, the confusion went away, and I'm quite well now.

First special delivery - April 2010 :
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#47 of 53 Old 12-18-2008, 12:46 AM
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I love the name Zosia. Our sons name is Jose. Which looks normal except we're Portuguese so its a soft j sound in Portuguese/Brazilian not an h sound like in Spanish. And we call him Ze. Zezinho for little Ze and Zezao for big Ze. He's also Kuya Ze (big brother Ze in the Philippines). He loves them all. Call her what she wants to be called! Its a beautiful name!

Michelle (41), Mateo (43), Taro (16), Malaya (8), Jose (4), and little Kaleo (4 months), chickens, goats, dogs and cats on two cozy acres.
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#48 of 53 Old 10-01-2013, 03:00 AM
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Hey my daughter is also named Zofia Teresa, born in 2005.  Glad to be Zofy is a country full of Sophia's.

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#49 of 53 Old 10-04-2013, 06:29 AM
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alot of people have chimed in, and i agree both Zofia and Zosia are lovely lovely names.


I wanted to relate my cousin's story to you because it is very similar. My aunt is american from a very middle class midwestern family, My uncle is a columbian indian. Their first child my aunt named and got a very common name. Their second child, they gave a hispanic name. As a child, my cousin was a little embarrassed about being different, more ethnic named and asked to be called by the americanized version of his name...until he discovered Rage Against The Machine, Cypress Hill and brown power in general. Then he requested we all start calling him by his more ethnic birth name. It took a while for us all to remember the new name but we happily respected his wishes and did it.


Today that same young man works as a lawyer for charity org that helps illegal immigrants, naturalized citizens, and native americans with their legal troubles.


He gave his first born son his name.



your daughter's story is no where near done yet, it's a beautiful name, i wouldn't worry about it just yet, as long as you are honoring her feelings about her name



fwiw, I also have a strange name, that is somehow unpronouncable to everyone, even though it is pronounced just like Melissa. I also hated it as a kid (I wanted to be called Rochelle) but cherish it's uniqueness and power now

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#50 of 53 Old 10-06-2013, 11:14 PM
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I think she has a lovely name with a great history behind it! I named my oldest Abirami which is always said wrong the first time. She goes by Abi (AH-bee) not Abby, but even though people say that wrong, too, they learn and then they say she has a pretty name. She is almost 13, at the stage where an identity crisis would have happened if it was going to about her name. And she loves her name, has not had any crisis about it. I suspect it will be the same for your daughter, too. I was amazed to see the class roster for my daughter's 4th grade class. So multicultural. There were only about 4 "normal" American names on the whole list. And several were very unique and quite obviously ethnic.


My 9 year old-- her name is Nitara. When we asked her what she wanted to be called when she started Kindergarten (her full name Nitara or her nickname Nita) she chose her full name. She is also proud of it.

7yo: "Mom,I know which man is on a quarter and which on is on a nickel. They both have ponytails, but one man has a collar and the other man is naked. The naked man was our first president."
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#51 of 53 Old 10-09-2013, 10:30 AM
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I'm in the same boat. 


It's kind of a long story but we live in France and found a French name, similar to my father's since my dad's name won't work here. It was similar to an Israeli name that we would have named him but were afraid that the spelling would be a pronunciation problem for the French. Better to chose an actual French name, right??


I heard it a lot in Paris where I was living before I got married. Paris is not far from Brittany, where this name comes from (you find tons of Breton names there). But then I moved to Eastern France, who do NOT know Breton names. 


Turns out it's similar to about six male names in France so he's always "Not Roland, not Renauld..." 


PLUS he won't correct people. They massacre it! I was told by Breton coworkers in Paris to NOT let people say it that way. 


When I call the school, it usually takes them a minute to register the name. Then I usually quip "Better not say that like that with any Bretons around!" or "Yes, he won't correct people..." or something similar and cutting. "Glad I picked a French name you could pronounce!" I've even used. 


Ironically, I named the next on a totally Israeli name, that everyone can say correctly! 




Amusing side story. We went to Israel on vacation. The security lady looks at the passports, with our very Jewish last name and honestly says "Did you know that your children all have Israeli names?!?"


You don't say! 

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#52 of 53 Old 10-31-2013, 07:12 AM
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I gave my dd a multicultural spelling of a  name that is used in many cultures, including American/English language (I don't want to post her actual name, sorry!) Think...Beatriz instead of Beatrice. The pronunciation is slightly different the way I spelled it.  However, she most often goes by the English version, though we call her both.


Her nickname is part of her name with the correct pronunciation, but we've kind of made a mess of it otherwise! I'm glad I picked the spelling I did, because it is part of my heritage, but I wish I would have been stricter about enforcing the correct pronunciation.


Dd is 6 now and pronounces it the English way-oh well!  I just find myself over explaining so people don't think I was trying to be unique with the spelling and messed it up :)

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#53 of 53 Old 10-31-2013, 08:52 AM
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I think kids figure this kind of stuff out amazingly well. I'm Polish as well and when my baby sister (born here in Canada but Polish was her first language and what we spoke at home) would refer to me at home she'd use my Polish name, but when we were out and about (i.e. at a grocery store) she'd use an English-ized version. She was 2 or 3 at the time but already she knew there was a difference.


With DD we opted to give her an English name that is easily translatable to Polish (many aren't) so that my family has a version of her name to call her without twisting their tongues. She responds to both (she's 2.5).

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