Anyone else have a DC with 2 names? - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 10 Old 12-16-2008, 06:35 PM - Thread Starter
 
bluedaisy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 608
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
I'm American and my DH is Kenyan - our DD is 3 weeks old and we gave her 2 names - Natalie Wanjiru - an American name and a Kenyan name. Our thought was that she would be called both names - probably her American family and friends would call her Natalie, and Kenyan family and friends would call her Wanjiru. When she gets old enough, she can choose how she would like to introduce herself.
However, people are constantly asking me which name they should use - I tell them they are both her names, they can call her either one. People seem to be very uncomfortable with that.
I've read that bicultural kids often feel like they have to choose one culture or another - I feel like there's pressure to do that already - why should we have to choose either her American name or her Kenyan name - is it really a big deal that she has 2 names?
Do your DC have a name from each culture? Do they use both names, or do you choose one that you use primarily?

Loving wife to DH and buddamomimg1.pngmama to DD (11/08) and DS (2/12)

bluedaisy is online now  
#2 of 10 Old 12-16-2008, 07:12 PM
 
tabrizia's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Maryland/DC Metro
Posts: 1,158
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
DS' first name is his American name and his middle name is his Hindi name. We will be doing the same with DD and any future children. We did this because DH has always been called by his middle name (his American name) rather then his Hindi name except when he visited India.

We actually will use both names with DS though we do default to his American name in general. We did want him to have the option of having a Hindi name if he wanted to use it though which is why we did it this way.

Sarah nak.gif married to DH Dan (August 2001) dh_malesling.GIF and Mommy to DS Desmond (April 2007) pinktongue.gif, DD Eloise (March 2009) hearts.gif and Sullivan (March 29, 2011) babyboy.gifselectivevax.gifdelayedvax.giflactivist.gifcd.giffamilybed2.gif
tabrizia is offline  
#3 of 10 Old 12-16-2008, 07:39 PM
 
Shianne's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: In the Land of the Snow Wolf
Posts: 457
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
My boys have both American and Japanese names. They love having both. Especially my oldest who is 19. They like being a part of both worlds.

Shianne
I am just me. Cert. HHP and Herbalist and mom to three wonderful home educated boys.
Shianne is offline  
#4 of 10 Old 12-18-2008, 03:55 AM
 
skreader's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Hong Kong
Posts: 681
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
My kids have both their Chinese names and their English names. We use them pretty much interchangeably. I really wanted to avoid using only 1 when they are "in trouble". When my own dad used my full name (given +middle name+ family name) I would get really really scared.

DH has an English name, which I use more often than his Chinese name, it's the name that he used when we first met.

His sibs often call him by the last character in his name, which he shares w/ his younger brother. So, when my b-i-l's wife calls him that too - I get a bit jarred.

In HK it's pretty common for people to use English names and/or their Chinese names. Nick names are also fairly popular, or part-of-name+family status appended. For example, I call my 2nd and 3rd sisters-in-laws' husbands by "second character of given name + goh" (meaning older brother).
skreader is offline  
#5 of 10 Old 12-18-2008, 04:11 AM
 
bremen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Reinickendorf
Posts: 633
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
i think your daughters names are beautiful, but i would feel a little confused if i was not told which name to use, or whether to use both.


stupid example, but learning german, there are at least 3 words for carrots. they are completely interchangeable, and all simply mean carrot. to this day, i feel uneasy talking about carrots in german, cause i feel like i might use the wrong word, even though i know that they are all acceptable.

does that make any sense?
bremen is offline  
#6 of 10 Old 12-18-2008, 08:54 AM
 
Liquesce's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Mayberry
Posts: 4,963
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by bremen View Post
stupid example, but learning german, there are at least 3 words for carrots. they are completely interchangeable, and all simply mean carrot. to this day, i feel uneasy talking about carrots in german, cause i feel like i might use the wrong word, even though i know that they are all acceptable.
I was going to say the same thing, but with an arabic dialect and "chicken."

Maybe instead of just "either or both is fine," "either or both is fine though at home we usually call her _____."
Liquesce is offline  
#7 of 10 Old 12-18-2008, 08:22 PM
 
Ms Apricot's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Sydney, Aus
Posts: 139
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by bluedaisy View Post
However, people are constantly asking me which name they should use - I tell them they are both her names, they can call her either one. People seem to be very uncomfortable with that.
The people who are asking are probably worried that the name they pick will say something about THEM - that it will indicate that they have an underlying preference or prejudice about one culture/heritage.

My father had 2 names - a Japanese name given by his parents (Japanese immigrants to Canada), and an "English" nickname given by his Canadian co-workers - and used widely by non-Japanese Canadians (i.e. at work and most social occasions). I always knew how someone was connected to my Dad, simply by the name they called him. It was a handy identifier.

My kids have Japanese names, but they are pretty much used only at their Japanese language school. They don't have any problems with the concept, and seem to enjoy it.
Ms Apricot is offline  
#8 of 10 Old 12-19-2008, 12:35 PM
 
MommyJoia's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 423
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
In America, my daughters' names are Rio Rayne and Yesmeen Sky and in Lebanon their names are Rio Najib and Yesmeen Najib. In-laws have no idea they have different names, but are completely against "American middle names" so what they don't know won't hurt them.
MommyJoia is offline  
#9 of 10 Old 12-19-2008, 12:54 PM
 
Joyster's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Toronto
Posts: 1,604
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
My kids don't, but a lot of my friends kids do. Particularly my Chinese friends, heck they too have two names. One English and one Chinese. The Chinese one is usually used by close friends and family, and the English is for everyone else.

Don't trust anyone under 5! Mom to 3 boys under 5. Blogging to save my sanity.
Joyster is offline  
#10 of 10 Old 12-20-2008, 02:10 AM
 
FelixMom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Montreal, Quebec
Posts: 464
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Our kids have Chinese middle names and English/French first names. My surname appears with the chinese name for Chinese school, and DH's lastname goes with the official birth certificate stuff. That way, both our lastnames are being passed down.

Sign hanging in Albert Einstein's office at Princeton: Not everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that can be counted, counts.
FelixMom is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off