Could you tell which was which? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 20 Old 01-26-2009, 10:26 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Could you tell which child was which race if they were:

1st child -half caucasian, quarter asian (bangladeshi), quarter african (kenyan)

2nd child -half caucasian, quarter asian (indian), quarter middle eastern (iranian)

Would you know which child was which from their appearance? Which had the asian/african father, and which had the asian/middle eastern father?

It wouldn't be possible to tell, right?
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#2 of 20 Old 01-26-2009, 11:58 AM
 
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I think it's impossible to answer that question w/o seeing the children - so much depends on which traits end up being more pronounced.
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#3 of 20 Old 01-26-2009, 12:09 PM
 
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I'm curious why you ask?
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#4 of 20 Old 01-27-2009, 02:46 AM
 
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It would be especially hard if they both looked like their mom.

It's not that the stay-at-home-parent gets to stay home with the kids. The kids get to stay home with a parent. Lucky Mom to DD1 (4 y) and DD2 (18 mo), Wife to Mercenary Dad
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#5 of 20 Old 01-27-2009, 08:29 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Prefere not to discuss why I asked on a public forum, but I wanted to be sure you couldn't tell just by looking at them.
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#6 of 20 Old 01-27-2009, 09:14 AM
 
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I dont think you can be sure, no. Sorry. there are people who have lived all over the world and are able to pick out certain charasteristics of many races and nationalities and might be very good and seeing such a thing. Also, people might be using their 6th, psychic sense to know about a child's cultural heritage.

This is not necessarily a bad thing, of course, unless it is used in a deragotary way.

People say that one of my children looks more "x" than the other, for example. I think that is just fine. It's not a negative trait about the race/nationality, it's just some beautiful thing that one kid inherited that the other didn't (but, of course, inherited many other beautiful things).

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#7 of 20 Old 01-27-2009, 09:40 AM
 
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I agree with jul… you cannot be certain that there is no way for anyone to tell, especially given so little information. We don't know what the fathers look like, or what the kids look like. For that matter, I don't even know if they have the same mother and "caucasian" is not very specific, but either way, I'd have to say, no, you cannot be SURE that it's impossible to tell.
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#8 of 20 Old 01-29-2009, 05:38 AM
 
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Genetics are funny. I know many multiracial people, and some are really easy to see what is in their background and others it's hard to tell.

At DS school their are several Asian/European kids. Some are like DS, who is a blend of DH and I with no specifically obvioulsy Asian or European traits. His eyes are sort of Asian and sort of European at the same time. His skin is half way between DH's and mine, He has soft brown very straight hair. However, There is another little girl and she has some very obviously Asian features along side some very obviously northern European ones.

I've known people who are 1/4 African, and they have to tell you about it or you would never guess. However, I've known people who are only 1/8 something and it's glaringly obvious.

There is absolutely no way to know how obvious or vague their ethnic background will be till one looks at them.

If it is a question of looking like a family member though there is also the question of familial traits that have nothing to do with race. DH's whole family on one side has a certain dimple. DS has that dimple too. It has absolutely nothing to do with race, it isn't something most Asian people have and dimples certainly aren't limited to Asian people. However, it would have seemed odd if DS didn't have it since everyone else from that side of the family does.

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#9 of 20 Old 01-29-2009, 08:46 PM
 
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There's no way to answer this question without a picture of these assumingly gorgeous children. You may, especially if they have stronger features associated with one race or another.

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#10 of 20 Old 01-29-2009, 09:16 PM
 
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Some people would be able to tell. Most wouldn't.
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#11 of 20 Old 01-29-2009, 11:25 PM
 
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The thing is, there are some really distinctive features that could tip a person off, but also, India is really big and there are several ethnicities living in Kenya and Iran. Even Bangladesh has different ethnicities within it. So unless we, personally, knew their daddies, none of us could say. It might be blindingly obvious, though.

It's not that the stay-at-home-parent gets to stay home with the kids. The kids get to stay home with a parent. Lucky Mom to DD1 (4 y) and DD2 (18 mo), Wife to Mercenary Dad
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#12 of 20 Old 02-01-2009, 02:56 PM
 
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its really hard to say without seeing them because it all depends on whose genes are stronger as a parent. sorry i couldn't be of more assistance.

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#13 of 20 Old 02-04-2009, 09:53 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jul511riv View Post
I dont think you can be sure, no. Sorry. there are people who have lived all over the world and are able to pick out certain charasteristics of many races and nationalities and might be very good and seeing such a thing. Also, people might be using their 6th, psychic sense to know about a child's cultural heritage.

This is not necessarily a bad thing, of course, unless it is used in a deragotary way.

People say that one of my children looks more "x" than the other, for example. I think that is just fine. It's not a negative trait about the race/nationality, it's just some beautiful thing that one kid inherited that the other didn't (but, of course, inherited many other beautiful things).
This (The part I bolded.)

I have found that in The States generally people couldn't tell what I am, but here in Italy people are always saying; "Oh, you're Japanese, aren's you?" (or sometimes Chinese) they can tell right away. It was very surprising. I'm half Japanese and don't really look obviously Asian. --A lot of my Hungarian comes through. (I'm adopted, so I didn't know I was Japanese until I was 25. I grew up caucasian.)

I think that in The States we're really used to everyone just looking like they look, (don't know how else to say it) so our senses aren't really tuned in to "nationality".

So, I think it is possible that some people might be able to tell which is which, depending on which characteristics come through.

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#14 of 20 Old 02-04-2009, 11:22 AM
 
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My dh is able to tell not only that someone is from India, but often he can tell which part of India they are from! My dd's are recognized as part Indian by other Indian people we meet in public, wheras non-Indians have guessed they are of Mexican or S. American ancestry.

On the other hand, I have seen children with the same bio mother and father who looked so very different from each other. In my own family I have many people from India tell me that one dd looks "very Indian like her father" and the other one looks a lot more like me. They both have light brown skin and dark brown hair/eyes, but their bone structures are totally different.

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#15 of 20 Old 02-04-2009, 11:24 AM
 
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With out seeing the kids it is impossible.

I work with R. Her dad is Japanese mom White (American). She looks white except her black hair. I thought it was died because I had only seen her type of hair on Asian people. I didn't know until she saw a picture of my neice and nephew. She asked where there mom was from. Those kids look very Japanese but nothing like R. I apologized for not figuring it out. Her name is very Japanese. She said with neices and nephew that looked so Japanese she understood. My neices and nephew own grandparents praise at how Japanese they look. They are proud of it. They have no problem in Japan--except in height because they look so Japanese not mixed--sil has a bad word for it but I don't know it.
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#16 of 20 Old 02-04-2009, 11:43 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Marsupialmom View Post
With out seeing the kids it is impossible.

I work with R. Her dad is Japanese mom White (American). She looks white except her black hair. I thought it was died because I had only seen her type of hair on Asian people. I didn't know until she saw a picture of my neice and nephew. She asked where there mom was from. Those kids look very Japanese but nothing like R. I apologized for not figuring it out. Her name is very Japanese. She said with neices and nephew that looked so Japanese she understood. My neices and nephew own grandparents praise at how Japanese they look. They are proud of it. They have no problem in Japan--except in height because they look so Japanese not mixed--sil has a bad word for it but I don't know it.
Hapa is a term that means half Asian.
It used to be derogatory, but it is now embraced by those of us who are Hapa.

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#17 of 20 Old 02-04-2009, 09:24 PM
 
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Going off on a bit of a tangent:
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Originally Posted by USAmma View Post
My dh is able to tell not only that someone is from India, but often he can tell which part of India they are from! My dd's are recognized as part Indian by other Indian people we meet in public, wheras non-Indians have guessed they are of Mexican or S. American ancestry.
Back when I worked in a fabric store, I had a group of customers from South America buying fabric. There were two older ladies who only spoke spanish and a younger one who spoke english but didn't sew. So, as I was helping them I was mostly speaking spanish.

A much older lady who was being help buy the other fabric cutter started talking all about how she loved Indian, and how she had lived there for many years when she was younger.

This little old lady thought these women were from India, even though we were speaking in spanish.

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#18 of 20 Old 02-04-2009, 10:43 PM
 
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I definitely think it would be impossible to tell. There is variation in all groups. I live in a little India and here I have met many full blooded Indians with natural green/blue eyes and also I've met full blooded Indian children with natural platinum blonde hair. My college roommate was a full blooded Chinese woman with very curly hair. My Korean friend, who had wavy hair, would used a Japanese straightening system to make her hair very straight. My Chinese roommate would do the same. So, sometimes some attributes may be uncommon, but it still exist. I don't believe any certain ethnic group as a specific look.
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#19 of 20 Old 02-04-2009, 11:11 PM
 
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Originally Posted by eepster View Post
Going off on a bit of a tangent:

Back when I worked in a fabric store, I had a group of customers from South America buying fabric. There were two older ladies who only spoke spanish and a younger one who spoke english but didn't sew. So, as I was helping them I was mostly speaking spanish.

A much older lady who was being help buy the other fabric cutter started talking all about how she loved Indian, and how she had lived there for many years when she was younger.

This little old lady thought these women were from India, even though we were speaking in spanish.
That is sooo funny! I had a conversation a few months ago with someone who first asked if my kids were foster kids, then she asked if they were adopted, then she asked if they were "mine". After that a woman from Iran had to explain to her that Iran was not a European country.

That reminds me-- people ask about speaking Indian all the time, and probably don't know that there are many languages in India. Each state has its own language (written and spoken) and culture. India was created from a bunch of tribes uniting into a single country. I'm afraid Spanish is not one of the languages they speak there. (Except actually they do speak Portuguese in the state of Goa because it was once a colony.)

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#20 of 20 Old 02-05-2009, 02:12 AM
 
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Originally Posted by eepster View Post
Going off on a bit of a tangent:

Back when I worked in a fabric store, I had a group of customers from South America buying fabric. There were two older ladies who only spoke spanish and a younger one who spoke english but didn't sew. So, as I was helping them I was mostly speaking spanish.

A much older lady who was being help buy the other fabric cutter started talking all about how she loved Indian, and how she had lived there for many years when she was younger.

This little old lady thought these women were from India, even though we were speaking in spanish.
I have to comment on this... DH is from Asia and I was born here but we speak Russian between us, and people have on at least three occasions come up to us and offered a book, or help, or a kiosk, for Spanish-speakers.

Now... we do both have that kind of vaguely Mediterranean look about us but come on, does Russian sound anything like Spanish? Cracked us up. I guess some people just have NO ear for languages!

It's not that the stay-at-home-parent gets to stay home with the kids. The kids get to stay home with a parent. Lucky Mom to DD1 (4 y) and DD2 (18 mo), Wife to Mercenary Dad
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