DH thinks that we should go around his dad's side of the family more. I don't disagree, but we just don't get that way very often. Also, I don't really have a lot in common with a lot of his cousins, and I feel like I kind of stick out like a sore thumb. I wish his mom's side of the family was closer (they all live about 2 hours away), because all of the cousins on that side are in biracial relationships so all of their kids look like Erma.
I have tried to ask her why she wants to be white, or things like that. A few months ago, it was because "people will like me better if I'm white".
That was right after someone said something to her. We talked about that, and she seems to have moved on past that. However, now she just talks about being white. It really doesn't help that all of the kids in our coop (we homeschool) are white, most of the kids in her sunday school class are white, all the girls in her dance class are white, etc. I just think maybe she's trying to relate to someone, and she thinks if she's white it would be easier? I don't know.
I just don't want her to have these issues. DH had a lot of trouble when he was growing up because of race. He went to a very prestigious white private school, and most of his friends growing up were white. All of his cousins called him 'sellout' and 'uncle tom' because they said that he didn't 'act black enough' What the? He also says that he has a hard time deciding where he 'fits in' because of all this. The white community that he was around didn't fully embrace him because he was black. However, the black community didn't embrace him either because he didn't act black.
I just don't want my kids feeling like they don't fit in anywhere. Know what I mean? I think my kids are the most beautiful miracles, and I wish they would see themselves like that. My husband and I have talked about how biracial children are often superior because they were able to pull the best from both gene pools. However, you can't really explain that to a 4 yr old
So, I guess I will try to just keep the lines of communication open. We are also going to try to set up a playdate or sleepover with some of her cousins that are black (at our house), so she can get some different exposure. I will also keep in mind that a lot of could just be the fact that she wants to identify with me, and that is how she does it.
Sigh. Why does this have to be so hard?