Transplanted Mamas, can we have a show of hands? - Page 4 - Mothering Forums

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Old 03-26-2008, 10:58 AM
 
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I've been in Europe for 13 years.
My DH is French, my DS so far only has French citizenship and I have dual.

As for language I speak English with my DS though there are times I will speak French to him--it's never confused him. If a book is in French then I read it to DS in French.

My DH speaks French with DS and English with me. We have always lived in a French speaking place but DS' English is better than his French. He's never gone to school so I'm sure that makes a difference.

As for culture I would say my DS is totally multi-cultural. Even though he doesn't have American citizenship he considers himself to be half-American. He enjoys trips to Target and Chuck E. Cheese, his favorite candy is Nerds and he knows the schoolhouse rock songs (and a lot more american stuff but these are just a few examples). He is very close to my mom and sisters. He feels as much at home there as he does here.
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Old 03-26-2008, 11:31 AM
 
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I wanted to quickly chime in late on the bi/tri-lingualism discussion. I am so surprised here by how many kids of non-English speaking parents speak mainly English to their parents. Of my neighbours, none of the kids speak to their parents in their (parents') native languages. French siblings speak in English to each other etc. As a parent I think I would find that very difficult - maybe you get used to it? I kind of hope there is more other language speaking that goes on at home that I'm not privvy to.
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Old 03-26-2008, 03:24 PM
 
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nznavo,
I've noticed that a lot over here too--once the kids go to a school where only French is spoken. Those who go to some type of school where they spend at least a small portion of the schoolday in the non-local language are the ones I hear speaking to their parents in that language rather than in French. I've seen this time and time again so I do think there is something to it.
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Old 03-30-2008, 07:52 PM
 
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I'm jumping in a little late. I keep forgetting this sub-forum is here.

I'm an American, married to a Turk (dual citizen) and the mom of one totally American teen (from previous marriage) and one Turkish-American baby, living in Istanbul, Turkiye. We mostly speak English at home, but MIL lives with us and doesn't speak English, so there's a good amount of Turkish going on. I speak very little Turkish, and very badly for that matter, but there are some general phrases that have crept into my everyday speech (haydi = come on/let's go; yapma = don't do it). DD's Turkish level is about the same as mine and DS doesn't speak much yet, but his jibberish sounds a lot more Turkish than English. He seems to understand equal amounts of Turkish and English. DH is talking about us moving back to the US, so I'm hoping to build a network of Turkish friends who can help keep the language alive for DS (and the rest of us, too).
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Old 03-31-2008, 02:46 PM
 
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Originally Posted by autumnfairy76 View Post
Hi and thanks for the info on the Message Group. It looks great, but I am in Lyon, which is at least 2 hours away. I did meet a couple girls when I arrived here in a young mom's group, but it is french speaking and my french is terrible still. too bad message isn't here too.
Please look up the LLL France website and find groups in your area - in fact I'm fairly sure that there is an english speaking group around you, not absolutely sure though. LLL france has a wealth of information and if you need to contact an english speaking group to find out more the Paris English Group are more than happy to help with anything you need, if you have the time before you birth then take the numbers of the hotline phone and various leaders in your area - it's always best to be prepared especially here in france!!

good luck. PM if you need any LLL info.

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Old 04-01-2008, 07:50 AM
 
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Hi,

I consider myself as a migrant to another country.
(you named it transplant but then I get images of bloody intestines of all kinds - sorry)

I am a native Belgian raised in Belgium, who moved to Turkey to marry and live there with her Kurdish-Arabic origin husband.
We live here for almost 8 years now and have two children, aged 2 and 4. We raise them in a multi-langual and multi-cultural manner. We use the OPOL method quite strictly, I speak Dutch with them, my husband Turkish.. They are also exposed to English since my husband and I started out in English and often still have conversations in English, mixed with Turkish and Dutch. Some Kurdish comes in by my in-laws, too, but we live far from them so the Kurdish input is very very little, and merely passive. I am a SAHM at the moment, my eldest son of 4 goes to private pre-school for half a day. So he gets half of the day a Turkish 'language-cultural-food' bath, and the other half mainly the Belgian version, and evenings and weekends are mixed :-).

One of the nice things here, I find, is that breastfeeding and also long-term bf (not unusual untill 1,5-2) , is looked upon as something relatively normal, comparing to how it is perceived in Belgium. Also SAHM is more accepted in this country than in my home country nowadays, but in both countries it is less (or not) appreciated when you have a degree.

I feel both integrated (NOT assimilated and will never be nor want to even if I would ever get dual citizenship) and very much Belgian (probably that 'strange' foreign woman in the middle of the street..many people also 'know' me from hear say, sometimes when I randomly speak to someone in the neighbourhood, I get to hear 'Oh, you must be that foreign lady living next to blablabla, I've been hearing lots about you' ??? :-).
I have both positive and negative experiences being a foreigner in my new home country. And of course I do miss my other homeland and friends/family there and like to travel there once every one or two years or so, if possible, but more difficult and expensive when children involved.
We often have family from both sites visiting for a couple af weeks a time, spread over the year. Nice, but these are always stay-overs so a lot more work to do and less privacy at times. Spring-Summer-Autumn can be busy at times!

I do not know any other foreign young mothers in my area (only at the other end of town, 1h travel). So it is nice to have found this new forum at MDC to discuss some 'multicultural' topics.

Regards,

Me :
H
4y old
2m old
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Old 04-18-2008, 10:50 AM
 
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Hello!

Another "transplanted" mama here. Born in Czechoslovakia (or what was Czechoslovakia at that time...., now Czech Republic), moved to Algeria at age 3, moved to Switzerland at age 6 and grew up there. I then met DH and moved to Canada at age 24, where I have now been for the past 8 years.

I have dual citizenship (swiss & canadian) but consider myself Swiss. Being "canadian" is mostly an administrative thing for me. I live here so I want to partake in the political/administrative decisions of this country; but my identity is primarily swiss (eventhough I do start to feel increaseingly disconnected from the "swiss identity" as I see it in my family and swiss friends).
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Old 04-25-2008, 02:44 AM
 
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Huh. I didn't know this was here.

I guess "transplanted" works. I thought "expatriate" worked as well, since I retain my US citizenship. But











So anyway, a question:

All you transplanted mamas, have any of you dealt with a sick parent/close relative from this long distance?



My father was just diagnosed with cancer. We're not on the same continent. We don't have the money to go back and forth. Am ... flailing here.




Any experiences, advice, ruminations, suggestions, or even just plain rants, I'll take 'em all ...




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Old 04-25-2008, 05:51 AM
 
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This is something that is on my mind a lot. I was not in Denmark yet but still 1000+ miles away and too poor to travel when my grandfather died. His wife is my only remaining grandparent and although she is relatively healthy, physically, right now, she is emotionally a wreck and it is hard to only be able to write letters. (She doesn't have a computer.) I just always worry what will happen next.
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Old 05-08-2008, 10:19 PM
 
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Hi Mamas.. I lurked in the ex-pat forum, and didn't realized you all moved here... So I'm subbing again, and hope I'll really be able to join you as a transplant..

DH and I still live in the US (Utah), but he is working on getting his Scuba Instructor License, and wants to move us out of the country.. somewhere.. but we have no idea where and when.

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Old 05-09-2008, 03:01 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by LizzyQ View Post
Hi Mamas.. I lurked in the ex-pat forum, and didn't realized you all moved here... So I'm subbing again, and hope I'll really be able to join you as a transplant..

DH and I still live in the US (Utah), but he is working on getting his Scuba Instructor License, and wants to move us out of the country.. somewhere.. but we have no idea where and when.
The Maldives?

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Old 05-14-2008, 10:34 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by merpk View Post
All you transplanted mamas, have any of you dealt with a sick parent/close relative from this long distance?



My father was just diagnosed with cancer. We're not on the same continent. We don't have the money to go back and forth. Am ... flailing here.




Any experiences, advice, ruminations, suggestions, or even just plain rants, I'll take 'em all ...




Merpk, I am so sorry, I have only just read this post. I wish that I had some kind of advice......

With regards to contacting family, my US family & I have been enjoying Skype webcam lately- it's imperfect, but at least I can see my parents faces in real time. And I saw my 10 month old niece walk, not 2 hours after she did it for the first time. THat was pretty special- I tease my sister that my niece will think that the computer is named 'Aunty Sarah'!

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Old 05-15-2008, 05:23 PM
 
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merpk,

Oh I[m so sorry. Please let me know if I can help at all.

We have a voice over ip phone and it just makes talkignso much easier. You can also webcam.

I'm so sorry. R"S.

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Old 05-16-2008, 12:53 AM
 
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merpk,
being away from family and friends is the hardest part about living here...
no advice just hugs and sympathy and some healing vibes.
Kathryn
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Old 05-19-2008, 11:49 PM
 
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I'm Greek, married to a Brit. I've been living in England for 16 years(almost 17) and all of us hold dual citizenship.
I don't have problems fitting in, and all my friends are English. My mum lives with me and i don't have a big family. My father passed away and my brothers live in Greece but we visit often and they visit too.

My kids are multilingual (English/Greek/Spanish/Portuguese).
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Old 05-28-2008, 07:50 AM
 
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I guess I'm an expat/transplant combo. I am living (temporarily) in Egypt while we build a house here. My DH is Egyptian. We plan to live between here and elsewhere (right now, DH is working in Abu Dhabi). If he goes back to the US for work, we will live there about 8 months/year and here the rest. The kids are homeschooled so it makes it a lot easier. My kids are 6 (almost), 4, and 6 months (almost). The older two have never been raised in the US (Well, DS was there for about 18 months but as an infant) and yet neither speak much Arabic (lazy DH ) and they really don't have any cultural affiliation yet. I've noticed that they aren't aware of cultural "rules" either here or in the States. They are a bit young yet though, so I expect that will change. I do kind of point out do's and don'ts so they don't make any major faux paus.

I do hope to work here once the kids are closer to their teens as a midwife but we'll see.
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Old 06-11-2008, 05:45 AM
 
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Can I join you? I followed a link from the expat forum...

I'm a canadian expat living with DH in Seoul, Korea. We're TTC #1 right now and VERY excited but a bit worried about starting our family journey so far from home! I don't speak much of the local language here and don't know many english speakers yet so I've found MDC to be really great so far. I haven't yet found any MDC moms in Seoul though.

DH and I plan to BF, CD/EC, AP, and cosleep and I would like as natural as birth as is possible here (so far having a rough time finding out what IS possible here). We're also into natural/organic living, and would someday like to be semi-self-sufficient on our own small farm in the sun- but we love to move around a lot, so I'm not too sure when that will happen! I love to travel, love all kinds of music, I'm into "radical politics"/anarchism, art and literature, and education (esp. language and literature pedagogy).

We won't be in big-city Seoul for long (just another year or two), we plan to move to NZ for DH to do his PhD. After that, it's anyone's guess where we'll end up or where our family's journey will lead, so it's nice to read about all of you worldly ladies raising great kids around the earth.

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Old 06-11-2008, 05:46 AM
 
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forgot to sub...

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Old 06-13-2008, 11:59 AM
 
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I find this thread interesting since my hubby and I have been thinking of moving somewhere in Europe, specifically leaning toward Denmark.

My hubby is Romanian and is living with me in the US(I'm a US citizen.) We have one child as of now and are expecting another in December.

I'm going to subscribe to keep track of this thread.

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Old 06-13-2008, 12:08 PM
 
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I am German, having moved to Denver, CO for work and met a Frenchman! Yeah, I know. So, now we are married, DS 4 years old and DD 2 years. Love the sunshine, hate the way flight tickets have gone up...
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Old 06-14-2008, 10:17 AM
 
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i have been in japan for 22 years, married for 12 with 3 kids.... they have dual nationality. I plan on being here for the long term.... never once thought of myself as an expat.... rather just a foreigner... in japan.. with a japanese family. flying back to the states this year and sick about the expense and the extra security and stress with traveling.....
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Old 06-15-2008, 04:25 AM
 
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Im an American living in Mali, West Africa for 9 months while my husband works on his dissertation research. Love to see so many other global mamas out there!

S, mama to boy M(6/07) and baby girl R(7/10). We do all the good natural family living stuff!
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