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#1 of 12 Old 10-30-2008, 07:13 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I actually have a thread related to this going on in Personal Growth, but I thought people here might have a similar experience that they could share with me, so here goes....

DH, DS and I moved back to the US in Feb. I'm American, DH isn't. He was laid off from his job in France and got a severance package that paid for the move, for training and for 9 months with an executive search firm, plus a lump sum of money.

I (naively, apparently) thought that DH, who has an Engineering degree, a Master's and an internationally recognized Project Management certification (plus 8 yrs professional experience) would find a job within 4-6 months. He's still looking. It feels like every time he gets close to getting hired, the company closes the position due to bad economic news. He's sent out hundreds of resumes and had dozens of interviews.

I am worried about his self-esteem, his morale, and in the long run, his career. We're living with my parents, and most of the time it's fine, but we really expected/ hoped to be in our own place by now.

Has anyone already done this? What was your experience like?
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#2 of 12 Old 10-31-2008, 06:20 AM
 
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it is a REALLY hard situation to be in!!
a few years ago, pre-children, my husband and i moved from japan to australia (my home country). with his pretty good english, japanese skills, engineering degree and lots of computer related work experience, i thought he'd be able to get a decent job. he ended up working in a restaurant and then sorting mail. we only lasted there a bit over a year. now really regretting it and thinking of doing it all over again!! it was really hard on his self-esteem and our relationship in some ways.
i wish i had a happier ending for you.....
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#3 of 12 Old 10-31-2008, 11:56 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Wow, I wish you had better news, too!

So far I have compiled three stories. In two cases, (including yours!) the couple returned to the original country after a year. In one, it took a little over a year to get a job.

Sigh.
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#4 of 12 Old 11-08-2008, 07:44 PM
 
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good luch with the job search

we moved from the UK to France in 1995 and at first my husband studied French whilst I had a low paying job. It took AGES for him to find a proper job, in spite of diplomas and a little experience already .... we were 3 weeks from the "cutting date" I had set, after looking at our bank accounts, for going back to the UK where the job market seemed better at the time .... when he finally got hired for a decent post

there were times that were hard on our relationship ("what have we done?" ... "was it such a good idea ?" ....) ... we didn't have children at the time though, I would have freaked out too much doing that after the kids were born ...
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#5 of 12 Old 11-08-2008, 08:17 PM
 
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When we came back to the U.S. my husband, an engineer as well, did find a job within a few months, however that was with a willingness to take a job that was in his field but well beneath his full qualifications ... generally not a bad idea when looking at foreign degrees. How well qualifications tranfer obviously varies a lot, but in general employers like to see either schools or companies they know on a resume. Pretty much every immigrant I know here is an engineer, and almost all of them who are actually working as engineers tranferred here as students to complete a degree at a U.S. institution.

Has he looked into taking the FE exam and starting the path towards getting licensed as an engineer in your state? For ourselves we had pretty much determined that because the job he was overqualified for would meet the experience requirements for later taking the PE exam, that job plus the exams was the best route towards making the jobs he could get match the jobs he should be able to get. Obviously I don't know if it's a good route for you as well, but it might be worth looking into if you haven't already.
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#6 of 12 Old 11-09-2008, 01:29 AM
 
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Network, network, network! Can he go hang out at your place of worship (church, mosque, synagogue, so forth) and meet others? I know it has helped DH tremendously, not only to get moral support (everyone can connect to where he is at) but also to get tips and hear about openings from insiders.

It's a tough place to be in, I hope he finds something soon.

Momma to DD (12/04) hearts.gif and DS (11/09) hbac.gif.
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#7 of 12 Old 11-12-2008, 09:59 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Sorry, I just saw the new replies to this thread.

Liquiese, DH is a Telecom engineer. As far as I know, he doesn't need to take exams to work as an engineer here. That said, he hasn't worked as an engineer in several years, but as a project manager. Employers seem to like the engineering background, though.

Shwarma Queen, he has networked his butt off, but is handicapped by the fact that his network here is much smaller than the one in France/Lebanon and also by the fact that we are in a city with almost no white collar jobs, unless you're a doctor or a lawyer.

Today he started looking at seasonal jobs at UPS. The requirements to get a job are to be able to read letters and numbers. We tried to laugh about it, but I can tell it really hurts his self-esteem. He deserves so much better than that!

It's so grim. My stomach is constantly in knots. We're looking now at Canada or going back to France, or even to Lebanon (never an option before). We're in bad shape emotionally. I still can't believe we're in this situation. I never imagined it would be this difficult.

/end whine
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#8 of 12 Old 11-12-2008, 10:49 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Marylizah View Post
Shwarma Queen, he has networked his butt off, but is handicapped by the fact that his network here is much smaller than the one in France/Lebanon and also by the fact that we are in a city with almost no white collar jobs, unless you're a doctor or a lawyer.

Today he started looking at seasonal jobs at UPS. The requirements to get a job are to be able to read letters and numbers. We tried to laugh about it, but I can tell it really hurts his self-esteem. He deserves so much better than that!

It's so grim. My stomach is constantly in knots. We're looking now at Canada or going back to France, or even to Lebanon (never an option before). We're in bad shape emotionally. I still can't believe we're in this situation. I never imagined it would be this difficult.

/end whine
I definitely know what you mean about the self-esteem issue, when we first moved over from Spain 8 years ago, DH worked in maintenance at a grocery store- it was hard on him because he was so overqualified and it hurt his self-esteem to change trash bags, but I respect him more now because he did what he had to do to put food on our table until he found something better.

It's just a horrible time to be out looking for a job in the U.S. right now...unless you're a doctor/lawyer...we are fortunate that DH is a pipeline engineer (gas) so there's a boom for it right now, even though the rest of the economy is bad. Has he looked down here in Houston? I know the economic problems aren't hitting as hard here due to the oil/gas/refinery industries (and they do hire a very broad range of employees). IDK.

Keep looking, don't give up...

Momma to DD (12/04) hearts.gif and DS (11/09) hbac.gif.
I survived 16 mos! Ask me about breastfeeding a baby with posterior tongue tie, high palate, and weak oral motor skills- whew!

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#9 of 12 Old 11-12-2008, 11:44 PM
 
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It's a really bad time economically. But your DH will find suitable work if he gives himself time and patience. Have you expanded your search to nearby cities? It sounds like your town has little to offer, but big cities might be more likely to offer options.

There also tend to be decent sized Lebanese communities in most big cities in the U.S. If he can tap into those, he might be able to get some help. Remind him, and yourself, that a UPS job is only temporary until he can find the right job. Seriously, he will find it. It just might take longer than you imagined.

DS1: 2/02 ROTFLMAO.gif DD: 9/04 blahblah.gif DS2: 9/07jog.gif and EDD: 11/13 belly.gif

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#10 of 12 Old 11-12-2008, 11:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks again for the replies.

He actually has always been focussed on finding something outside of where we currently live. We always knew there weren't job prospects here-- it just happens to be where my folks live (and so we knew we could live rent-free).

We have definitely considered Houston, and he's applied to jobs there. I think he has hesitated to apply at energy companies because they don't see his experience as relevant to the jobs they have. But I will encourage him to keep trying.

LauraN, thanks for the encouragement. I appreciate it. We're feeling so hopeless right now. I certainly hope you are right that he will eventually find something that is good for his career.

Shwarma, I told DH that any honest work is nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed about. We do what we have to do. He knows that intellectually, but it feels like such a big step down for him. Btw, I love your user name, although my MIL thinks SHE's the shwarma queen!
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#11 of 12 Old 11-12-2008, 11:57 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Marylizah View Post
Btw, I love your user name, although my MIL thinks SHE's the shwarma queen!
I bet she makes some good Shwarma! There's an awesome place here called Shwarma King, and I got my whole law firm (basically) hooked on Shwarma from lunch there so I earned the nickname Shwarma Queen!

And BTW, there is a huge Arab crowd here too- where are you now?

Momma to DD (12/04) hearts.gif and DS (11/09) hbac.gif.
I survived 16 mos! Ask me about breastfeeding a baby with posterior tongue tie, high palate, and weak oral motor skills- whew!

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#12 of 12 Old 11-13-2008, 12:07 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by ShwarmaQueen View Post
I bet she makes some good Shwarma! There's an awesome place here called Shwarma King, and I got my whole law firm (basically) hooked on Shwarma from lunch there so I earned the nickname Shwarma Queen!

And BTW, there is a huge Arab crowd here too- where are you now?
PM'ed you!
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