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#241 of 257 Old 01-29-2009, 04:33 PM
 
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Unschooling is not just what's left when you take away all the school. It's something unique and amazing that gradually germinates, takes root and then springs to life -- in the presence of ongoing whole-hearted trust and freedom.

Miranda
From a mom who is just barely beginning her journey into unschooling, thank you for that.
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#242 of 257 Old 01-29-2009, 06:41 PM - Thread Starter
 
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This thread seems to be winding down a little, so before it's completely gone, can I just say....
I have REALLY enjoyed reading the responses, opinions, and theories on this thread. I am thrilled to be involved with and receive support from such an intelligent, insightful group of women!!

Jen...wife to Shawn...Radically Unschooling Mommy to Connor (4/03), Autumn (1/07) Aiden (1/08) and Ella (10/14/09) Just had the of our dreams!
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#243 of 257 Old 01-29-2009, 06:46 PM
 
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This thread seems to be winding down a little, so before it's completely gone, can I just say....
I have REALLY enjoyed reading the responses, opinions, and theories on this thread. I am thrilled to be involved with and receive support from such an intelligent, insightful group of women!!
I too have enjoyed it

Mama to 9 so far:Mother of Joey (20), Dominick (13), Abigail (11), Angelo (8), Mylee (6), Delainey (3), Colton (2) and Baby 8 and Baby 9 coming sometime in July 2013.   If evolution were true, mothers would have three arms!

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#244 of 257 Old 01-29-2009, 06:47 PM
 
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ditto! Great things happening here ladies!
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#245 of 257 Old 01-29-2009, 07:38 PM
 
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I agree!

Susan -- married unschoolin' WAHMomma to two lovely girls (born 2000 and 2005).
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#246 of 257 Old 01-30-2009, 03:31 AM
 
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I do think their are some curr. that may not be "unschooling" friendly, but Dom wants to get a science curr. that is a bunch of different books and the supplies for all of the experiments in one spot. His reason? Then we do not have to dig around to find and gather what he already knows he wants to use.

Makes sense to me.

Does that make him a homeschooler instead of an unschooler?
There's a difference between using a curriculum as a resource and using it because you think the people who put it together know something you don't about what and how you need to be learning.
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#247 of 257 Old 01-30-2009, 02:47 PM
 
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There's a difference between using a curriculum as a resource and using it because you think the people who put it together know something you don't about what and how you need to be learning.
I agree with that.

Mama to 9 so far:Mother of Joey (20), Dominick (13), Abigail (11), Angelo (8), Mylee (6), Delainey (3), Colton (2) and Baby 8 and Baby 9 coming sometime in July 2013.   If evolution were true, mothers would have three arms!

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#248 of 257 Old 01-30-2009, 04:01 PM
 
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There's a difference between using a curriculum as a resource and using it because you think the people who put it together know something you don't about what and how you need to be learning.
I also agree. This is the fine line of unschooling- Using resources or following an outside mandate.
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#249 of 257 Old 03-31-2009, 02:21 AM
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I am so thankful for this thread, I just finished reading every post! And it has really helped me with what I struggle with. I've always thought we were unschoolers, though did not know I needed a label. I did not think I needed to define what we do, just as I do not introduce myself as "WCM, I was a vegan for 10 years and now I love chicken.'. That's not WHO I AM, kwim?


Yet last week the kids and I were at a wilderness course for homeschoolers (meaning people who's children are free during the day, get it?) and another parent asked me "Are you a homeschooler?" and I sort of paused, wondering what else I'd be if my school-aged kids were not at school and were here in a homeschoolers course, and I said 'yeah, we homeschool.' and he replied' oh yeah, no we don't use a curriculum, we're straight up unschoolers".

when did I say I did use a curriculum? and what does it mean if i did? and why did it irk me so much that he thought we did use one?

to me homeschool means my kids don't go to school. that's it. but his comment opened my eyes to the wider view of some of HOW I do this being important to our discussion, even at that basic meet-and-greet stage. yet who knows what each person means by US, so how does my defining us as USers to him help?


That is my struggle, my 'issue', if you will. that we sem to need defining, and yet the definitions can be so different, and so many assumptions *can* come with those definitions. That I am an unschooler, but do not want an UNSCHOOLER bumpersticker. Why advertise my parenting methods? Oh but I do advertise my political beliefs. hmmm . . .

It has been so interesting to hear you all discuss it, from so many PsOV, with kids thoughts included, with respect and acceptance of our differences, overall. I pulled away from using the term US years ago after we met up with some US who told me we did not 'fit' the mold, as I taught my kids to follow basic social niceties (sharing toys in public, apologising) and a true US does not.

to read all the diff views and hear how it is defined differently, sort of, by many, helped a lot. i have found my forum.

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#250 of 257 Old 04-01-2009, 10:39 PM
 
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Yet last week the kids and I were at a wilderness course for homeschoolers (meaning people who's children are free during the day, get it?) and another parent asked me "Are you a homeschooler?" and I sort of paused, wondering what else I'd be if my school-aged kids were not at school and were here in a homeschoolers course, and I said 'yeah, we homeschool.' and he replied' oh yeah, no we don't use a curriculum, we're straight up unschoolers".
Did he want a gold star or some sort of prize for being an unschooler?

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#251 of 257 Old 04-02-2009, 01:12 PM
 
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Originally Posted by WCM View Post
Yet last week the kids and I were at a wilderness course for homeschoolers (meaning people who's children are free during the day, get it?) and another parent asked me "Are you a homeschooler?" and I sort of paused, wondering what else I'd be if my school-aged kids were not at school and were here in a homeschoolers course, and I said 'yeah, we homeschool.' and he replied' oh yeah, no we don't use a curriculum, we're straight up unschoolers".
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Did he want a gold star or some sort of prize for being an unschooler?
I think sometimes it can be an important shorthand and saying it casually diffuses people - meaning that if it's just tossed out there as a casual fact, a throwaway, then you're probably not going to get all up in arms when you realize how different you might be from someone else. I do this with certain things a lot, especially in groups where I'm certain there's going to be possible opposition. It's like a very casual stating possible obstacles up-front.

For instance, I might casually, perhaps even jokingly refer to my political standing in a group where I might be likely to encounter people who believe the opposite. Like I might call myself a pinko bleeding heart or something if I were meeting with people at, say, a church. Now, at different churches, I don't know who I'm going to meet. But say its suburban rather than urban and not UU, but some other form of Protestant church. I don't know enough about different religions to know who thinks homosexuals are an abomination or who works in soup kitchens every week, so I might just put that out there first thing, just in case.

It's like a sort of shorthand to explain why we might not want to go there, especially if there's an election or something. It also helps me feel relaxed about my standing rather than defensive or angry right off the bat. I can dismiss my entire viewpoint and not get in some heated discussion that I don't need to get into at the moment.

I don't know if I'm making sense, but I can see why someone would throw that unschooling label out there right away.

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#252 of 257 Old 04-02-2009, 01:58 PM
 
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I think sometimes it can be an important shorthand and saying it casually diffuses people - meaning that if it's just tossed out there as a casual fact, a throwaway, then you're probably not going to get all up in arms when you realize how different you might be from someone else.
I know what you mean-- I do this at times, too, like when I'm worried someone is going to try to rope me into conversation with racist tendencies or something like that. However, never have I done it with someone the instant we met. I could see if the OP asked this man what kind of curriculum he used, but this was not the case.

One of my friends is a good model for me for USing. She is very casual about it, not labeling it most of the time, though she is very passionate about it. She lives life, is easy-going, busy, and her kids are happy, and I think people see that.

But, maybe this man has had many bad reactions to USing so he feels he needs to clear the air. That would be sad.

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#253 of 257 Old 04-02-2009, 02:25 PM
 
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Originally Posted by WCM View Post
I am so thankful for this thread, I just finished reading every post! And it has really helped me with what I struggle with. I've always thought we were unschoolers, though did not know I needed a label. I did not think I needed to define what we do, just as I do not introduce myself as "WCM, I was a vegan for 10 years and now I love chicken.'. That's not WHO I AM, kwim?


Yet last week the kids and I were at a wilderness course for homeschoolers (meaning people who's children are free during the day, get it?) and another parent asked me "Are you a homeschooler?" and I sort of paused, wondering what else I'd be if my school-aged kids were not at school and were here in a homeschoolers course, and I said 'yeah, we homeschool.' and he replied' oh yeah, no we don't use a curriculum, we're straight up unschoolers".

when did I say I did use a curriculum? and what does it mean if i did? and why did it irk me so much that he thought we did use one?

to me homeschool means my kids don't go to school. that's it. but his comment opened my eyes to the wider view of some of HOW I do this being important to our discussion, even at that basic meet-and-greet stage. yet who knows what each person means by US, so how does my defining us as USers to him help?


That is my struggle, my 'issue', if you will. that we sem to need defining, and yet the definitions can be so different, and so many assumptions *can* come with those definitions. That I am an unschooler, but do not want an UNSCHOOLER bumpersticker. Why advertise my parenting methods? Oh but I do advertise my political beliefs. hmmm . . .

It has been so interesting to hear you all discuss it, from so many PsOV, with kids thoughts included, with respect and acceptance of our differences, overall. I pulled away from using the term US years ago after we met up with some US who told me we did not 'fit' the mold, as I taught my kids to follow basic social niceties (sharing toys in public, apologising) and a true US does not.

to read all the diff views and hear how it is defined differently, sort of, by many, helped a lot. i have found my forum.
I would take this to mean that like you said, since you were all in a group for homeschoolers, obviously you are all homeschoolers and he was asking if you are HOMEschoolers. I'm betting he was just looking for some fellow US for common ground. I don't think it has to be a nasty label thing.

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#254 of 257 Old 04-02-2009, 03:26 PM
 
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I've had people ask me whether dp or I do the homeschooling and when I struggle for an answer say, "Or are you unschoolers?" It's just people making conversation and trying to make connections in our case. (We both work and both show up at activities with the kids at different times, and we're both women, so people sometimes get confused.)

The way that guy set up the question seems weird since all the unschoolers I know IRL also identify as homeschoolers in conversation.

Like when my kid gets asked where she goes to school she says she's homeschool rather than giving the name of our school as recorded by the state, yk?
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#255 of 257 Old 04-03-2009, 04:11 PM
 
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These are interesting perspectives on the man's comment. Since I often refer to us as homeschoolers, it would feel kind of weird to me if someone said, "Are you homeschoolers?" (to which I would certainly say yes) -- and then this person said, "Oh, well we're UNschoolers" ... it would be almost like he were asking me a trick question, and once I'd admitted we were homeschoolers, he wouldn't believe me if I said we were "straight up unschoolers," too. Lots of unschoolers would say Yes, we homeschool.

Susan -- married unschoolin' WAHMomma to two lovely girls (born 2000 and 2005).
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#256 of 257 Old 04-03-2009, 04:31 PM
 
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These are interesting perspectives on the man's comment. Since I often refer to us as homeschoolers, it would feel kind of weird to me if someone said, "Are you homeschoolers?" (to which I would certainly say yes) -- and then this person said, "Oh, well we're UNschoolers" ... it would be almost like he were asking me a trick question, and once I'd admitted we were homeschoolers, he wouldn't believe me if I said we were "straight up unschoolers," too. Lots of unschoolers would say Yes, we homeschool.
That was how I took it too. I consider unschooling to be a form of homeschooling. I didn't hear his tone, but it seems socially aggressive to ask an innocent seeming question and then follow it up with a kind of slam.

I guess it's possible that he doesn't realize that the term "homeschool" is often inclusive of unschoolers.

ZM
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#257 of 257 Old 04-03-2009, 05:30 PM
 
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Yet last week the kids and I were at a wilderness course for homeschoolers (meaning people who's children are free during the day, get it?) and another parent asked me "Are you a homeschooler?" and I sort of paused, wondering what else I'd be if my school-aged kids were not at school and were here in a homeschoolers course, and I said 'yeah, we homeschool.' and he replied' oh yeah, no we don't use a curriculum, we're straight up unschoolers".
I thought his comment was a little odd (maybe even tricky), but since we are failry new to the unschooling philosophy I thought perhaps I was the one who was looking at it from the odd perspective. Then this morning I was looking for some unschooling information for dh and rereading some of Mary Griffith's Homeschooling Handbook; in the introduction when discussing terms she has this to say, "Though all unschoolers are homeschoolers, not all homeschoolers are unschoolers."
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