Well...today I had a lesson with my new student (10) and and the lesson started off badly enough...student had forgotten shoulder rest at home, so I improvised with violin wiping cloth and rubber bands. I'd brought a tube for her bow (1/2 bow, 1/4 violin...she can't handle the 1/2 violin yet), and that was found acceptable.
But not a lot of focus...was able to complete some tasks, but then started goofing around..."Are you bored"...(embarrassed...no...)....then other (9-yo) student showed up, 100% business, and the first thing I did was start of 10-yo with a basic rhythm on one string, 9-yo with a tune, and me with a harmony. Suddenly the whole dynamic switched...no more work slowdown or irrelevant comments...we got more done in 25 minutes than in all the previous lessons combined, including some simple finger patterns that 10-yo had been giving a really good impression of not being able to learn. (Of course some of the groundwork had been laid in previous lessons.)
Even though 9-yo is smaller and more timid, from the time she entered the room, I treated her as a colleague, and she responded in kind. Afterward, I drove 9-yo to the church I borrow for her lesson, and gave her the 1/2 size violin she is finally big enough to manage (just barely, but her arms are long and the bowing was getting ridiculous on a 1/4 size.) It's a much nicer instrument (a flea market find, a Saxon violin from 100 years or so back), and the look on her face when she realized how much more she will be able to do...was priceless. (I had to tell her that the violin won't always sound as good...almost all of my instruments sound better when the humidity is high, like today...after two or three days of rain. I've been told that violins sound best in the weather they are made in.)
The interesting thing about the 9-yo is this...I've taught her for two or three years, and the dad has never thought she was doing very well...he'd tell the mom "she sounds terrible"...and I'd tell the mom that she was doing precisely as I expected and that she would get to a point where she would fly. The mom would tell me that she was frustrated because the dad never heard us playing together. So one day the dad was the one who brought her to her lesson (they now live 90 miles away, so we have lessons in person every other week, with a couple of short lessons on Facetime in between to keep the practicing going), and we played a twin fiddle version of "Red Wing", which 9-yo adores. And Dad...got the most lovely smile on his face and said "that was beautiful", and 9-yo told me later "I'm so happy...my dad NEVER smiles like that". So now the whole family is on board (with my approach, whatever that is), and a little sister will be starting lessons in the spring.
The family started homeschooling this year (K12 I think, some online program anyway) because their new town's public school system is a very very poor fit...9-yo was at least 2 years ahead in every subject when they moved there last year. So I've been giving mom stuff from my homeschool library...of the three she returned this week, she loved David Albert's "have fun, learn stuff, grow", for the idea that children will excel and learn what is needed by doing what they love. I guess now I'm recruiting for the dark side.
So I guess that's all...got carried off on a tangent. As ever.
Deborah