The Idle Parent.... - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 101 Old 04-20-2008, 06:42 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Yeah!!

I'm including a link to a regular column in the UK's Telegraph newspaper.

It's written by Tom Hodgkinson, editor of The Idler, which I believe is a magazine.

The column is called The Idle Parent, and might just be my new favorite thing to read! Use the search feature in the Telegraphs webpage and type in "The Idle Parent"....it creates a list of links to all of the other topics he has written about in the column.

Maybe one of our UK mama's can tell us more about him, or the column....I just stumbled upon it this afternoon, and don't know much.

Enjoy!!!

Ok....I'm back again...I just have to include this quote from one of the columns (keep in mind his writing is very tongue-in-cheek!)..

"it has become obvious to me, watching our three children grow up, that the more they have been ignored, the better. The eldest had a surfeit of anxious parental supervision and is still the trickiest and most needy (although we're working on it). The second had a little less attention and she is more self-sufficient. The third was born on the bathroom floor and has had to get on with his own life. And he is perhaps the best of all three at playing. Certainly he is the most comical."

I LOVE it!!

Oh, or this...

"Paradoxically, the idle parent is a responsible parent because at the heart of idle parenting is a respect for the child, a trust in another human being. It is the irresponsible parent who hands the child over to various authorities for its education and care"

Okay, I'll let you read the rest on your own
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#2 of 101 Old 04-20-2008, 07:05 PM
 
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Thanks for sharing that!

I think I have a new hero! I LOVE the one on organized sports. But maybe that's just because I have no athletic ability, LOL!

ZM
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#3 of 101 Old 04-20-2008, 07:07 PM
 
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Where did you find those great quotes? All I found was the article about school.

: mama to 4 boys
: : :
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#4 of 101 Old 04-20-2008, 07:22 PM - Thread Starter
 
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From another one of his columns...if you type "the idle parent" in the telegraphs search box, you'll get a list of all his topics.
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#5 of 101 Old 04-20-2008, 07:45 PM
 
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Pretty good stuff!
Now I can be an idle parent, not just a neglectful parent, when I have no clue where my kids are.

: mama to 4 boys
: : :
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#6 of 101 Old 04-20-2008, 11:25 PM
 
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thanks for sharing


So far I just love this guy

now back to reading..............
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#7 of 101 Old 04-20-2008, 11:43 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Has anybody figured out if this is a weekly, bi-weekly, or monthly column? I feel like I'm going to crave my "fix" of his oh-so-british dry sense of humour!!
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#8 of 101 Old 04-21-2008, 05:46 AM
 
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Don't post much here (if I ever have at all, so, 'Hi!' if that's the case)...just wanted to say I think I'm in love with this man. Saw his article on education posted somewhere before, I think. I've always wondered why it was that everyone thought parenting had to be so damn hard, and that parents were supposed to find the extreme difficulty somehow pleasant and rewarding.

I copied and pasted his 'Manifesto for the Idle Parent'. I'm going to print it, put it up somewhere I can read it everyday, and read it everyday. I have found my parental calling, and this is it.
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#9 of 101 Old 04-21-2008, 06:12 AM
 
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will go check it out but he sounds hilarious! good find
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#10 of 101 Old 04-21-2008, 09:10 AM
 
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~Marie : Mom to DS(11), DS(10), DD(8), DD(4), DD(2), & Happily Married to DH 12 yrs.!
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#11 of 101 Old 04-21-2008, 12:55 PM
 
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awesome! thanks for sharing that.
it's not like I need to get off the computer any time this week

By reading this signature, you agree to join my cult :nana
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#12 of 101 Old 04-21-2008, 01:19 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cjuniverse View Post

I copied and pasted his 'Manifesto for the Idle Parent'. I'm going to print it, put it up somewhere I can read it everyday, and read it everyday. I have found my parental calling, and this is it.
I put it up on the fridge!!



I just spend 20 minutes on my blog writing about how in love with this man I am! Where has he been all my life??
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#13 of 101 Old 04-21-2008, 01:36 PM
 
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This is awesome.
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#14 of 101 Old 04-21-2008, 05:34 PM
 
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he also writes for "the ecologist" magazine, my favorite mag since moving to the UK. they have a good website, e-newsletter, and a few blogs i really like: www.theecologist.org

my fave article of theirs is on the infant formula industry. search for "suck on this" on their site. so good, you'll be on your soapbox for weeks!
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#15 of 101 Old 04-21-2008, 06:23 PM
 
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Unfortunately I don't have time to read through all his columns (my 'puter is crapped), but I loved the one you linked to.

Overprotecting kids and being an overinvolved parent is something that's come up online on Boing Boing lately, especially after the launch of Free Range Kids.
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#16 of 101 Old 04-21-2008, 08:14 PM
 
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I remember being pregnant 20 years ago and going to a LLL meeting and one of the people running the group was talking about "benign neglect' and how kids need space to grow without adults being in their face every minute. It stayed with me, and I have never gotten into micro-managing, and my kids (I think) have fared better because of it. I can tell you this; they all have great imaginations and don't need me much. :

lol
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#17 of 101 Old 04-21-2008, 08:28 PM
 
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UUmom, I remember being pregnant 20 years ago too & I can recall the same thing. I think it was Norma Jane Bumheimer (i'm not getting her last name correct) ....an LLL author who called it a little good wholesome neglect.

I don't think we're allowed to say those things anymore.

Damn, I'm old.

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Me My Blog Mama to 7 babes & four spirit babies
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#18 of 101 Old 04-21-2008, 09:58 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mama in the forest View Post
UUmom, I remember being pregnant 20 years ago too & I can recall the same thing. I think it was Norma Jane Bumheimer (i'm not getting her last name correct) ....an LLL author who called it a little good wholesome neglect.

I don't think we're allowed to say those things anymore.

Damn, I'm old.

All true!

I think you're thinking of Bumgardner? She was also a Mothering editor...that was a billion years ago...

ETA: Bumgarner:

http://www.naturalchild.org/guest/no...umgarner2.html
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#19 of 101 Old 04-22-2008, 12:27 AM
 
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we had his book and LOVED it. Thanks for posting this!
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#20 of 101 Old 04-22-2008, 01:11 AM
 
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One, I'm so glad I found this board and two, I'm so glad I found this guy. Hilarious.

This is my favorite: "Imagine making all those sacrifices, putting yourself out for your children, going without, and then they go junkie on you."
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#21 of 101 Old 04-22-2008, 04:21 AM
 
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Well his columns certainly made me feel better!
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#22 of 101 Old 04-22-2008, 03:24 PM
 
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Nice! I'll definitely be bookmarking his stuff. Thanks! Lillian
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#23 of 101 Old 04-22-2008, 11:00 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for posting this on the HSC group site Lillian....I lurk there, but I rarely post there.....actually, now that I think about it, I don't think I've ever posted there!

R
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#24 of 101 Old 04-22-2008, 11:07 PM
 
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Originally Posted by rbeaufoy View Post
Thanks for posting this on the HSC group site Lillian....I lurk there, but I rarely post there.....actually, now that I think about it, I don't think I've ever posted there!

R
Well, with stuff like this in your pocket, you *should* post there! Lillian
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#25 of 101 Old 04-22-2008, 11:41 PM
 
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.....was great. I actually laughed out loud at the first line on the second page. We all need someone like this around to remind us that we're not crazy.
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#26 of 101 Old 04-23-2008, 12:00 PM
 
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Thanks so much for posting that!
Way to go idle parents!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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#27 of 101 Old 04-25-2008, 02:09 PM - Thread Starter
 
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HE'S WRITING A BOOK!!!

he's writing a book, he's writing a book, he's writing a BOOOOOKKKKK!!!

Oh, so happy

Guess what it's called?

The Idle Parent....original, huh?

Yippeeeee!

R
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#28 of 101 Old 04-25-2008, 03:16 PM
 
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Robyn, this is CBeebies

I used to read Tom when his column was just 'The Idler' in the money section of the Telegraph but it got a bit expensive buying the whole paper for a rather right wing read just to seek out a little golden nugget! If you knew the paper you would be surprised to find him there!

Another good read online is Living with Teenagers We laugh along with it every week and sometimes have wry smiles of recognition. These little people grow and grow but we love them like we did when they were weeny.
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#29 of 101 Old 04-25-2008, 03:33 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thank you Orangefoot!

Sort of like Noggin or Sprout here in the US.

It's strange to be a Canadian, married to a Mexican, living in the US, when most of my family is in Canada or the UK. When stuff like CBeebies comes up, I feel clueless and out of touch.

Sigh....someday we'll all be closer together again

I'm somewhat familiar with the Telegraph....familiar enough to be stunned that they are running a column like the Idle Parent! I bet it rings true with enough readers though, for it to be "worth their time".

thanks again R
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#30 of 101 Old 04-25-2008, 07:25 PM
 
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has anyone read his book How to Be Idle? It's really really funny. And spot on!
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