Want to discuss circ (and why not to do it) with a pg coworker - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 7 Old 11-28-2003, 10:16 PM - Thread Starter
 
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New to the board & need some ideas - have read the archives, but still not sure how to go about this.

I have a co-worker (an RN - we're both in medical fields) who is pg with her first, a boy - due in a couple of weeks. I'd love to discuss circ with her (esp. as her DH is somewhat of the man's man/rough & tumble guy that I think may be very pro-circ - just a guess) but am not sure how. Neither of us is very inhibited about discussions, but I've only known her a few months (just started the job) and don't want to offend. But I also don't want another mutilated child in the world, either!

My friend isn't super AP-oriented, but is planning to BF for at least "a few months." Really nice - although I'm sure she thinks I'm a whacko (which is why I'm at MDC! so I know I'm not a whacko!) after all my discussions with her re: homebirth, drug-free birth, midwives, etc (all "this is what I want to do" things - not overt suggestions that she change her path).

Anyhow, I've rambled enough - but any ideas for gentle ways to bring this up? I'm in an area that is about 95% circ, btw.

Thanks!

crafty mama to Chloe and Emma (10/08) and Piper
emergency medicine PA and single mother by choice
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#2 of 7 Old 11-29-2003, 12:13 AM
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Good for you!
Print out the Dr. Fleiss article about why circ is unnecessary (the sticky is at the top of this forum). Then you can share it with her, saying something like, "I thought you might find this information useful since you're having a boy. Let me know if you'd like to discuss it further."
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#3 of 7 Old 12-01-2003, 09:42 PM
 
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Good suggestion, that's what I usually do.

One thing though, don't underestimate the rough-and-tumble guys...my dh is the ultimate jock, frat guy and all that (and is, of course, circ'd) but it wasn't that hard to convince him at all!

He loves it that Owen has it all now!

Ilaria mamma to Owen, Caroline & Patrick .... loving life as expats in Asia intactlact.gifnovaxnocirc.gifuc.jpgnamaste.gif
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#4 of 7 Old 12-01-2003, 10:26 PM
 
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I hate to be a downer here but I would also suggest you find a way to broach the topic outside of work.

Only because it could very well be construed as sexual harrassment and you could be reprimanded for it. Any talk of sex organs, whether they belong to your newborn or not, is grounds for sexual harrassment.

Now, you and this woman may have gotten down and dirty in conversations about your love lives but if she gets offended (as MANY do when they find out circumcision is not all sunshine and roses) she may decide to complain to a superior. Or even more innocently, mention it to someone else in casual conversation and THEY get offended and complain.

By all means, I am for speaking up against circumcision but I cannot talk about it at work because I know I will get in trouble, if not fired. I brought my home-waterbirth video and a couple of the girls watched in on their lunch hour in a back room on the small LCD screen on the camcorder and I got reprimanded with the sexual harrassment speech.

Be true to yourself but be careful.
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#5 of 7 Old 12-06-2003, 02:13 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for the advice - hadn't even thought about the sexual harassment angle. Sad how this world has become - we can't even talk about birth/babies/genital health without sexual harassment getting into it.

I appreciate all the helpful comments - will see if I can't get her Dr. Fleiss's article some other way than through work.

Thanks much!

crafty mama to Chloe and Emma (10/08) and Piper
emergency medicine PA and single mother by choice
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#6 of 7 Old 12-06-2003, 09:07 PM
 
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This is always one of my favorites to print out and give to someone:

It’s a boy
http://www.circumstitions.com/Itsaboy.html

Someone posted that they make a card out of it. I am not that talented though.
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#7 of 7 Old 12-09-2003, 01:39 AM
 
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http://www.cirp.org/

(Maybe the mini video of a baby being circumcised will change her mind. )
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