Post here if you're from the Midwest (or other high circ area) and have an intact son! - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 142 Old 04-06-2009, 09:05 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Just wanted to know that I'm not alone. I'm in Michigan and have an intact baby son, 5 1/2 weeks old, born on February 27th!
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#2 of 142 Old 04-06-2009, 10:23 PM
 
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Well, we don't yet...But we will come August! I know what you mean about the high circ rate here in MI.
I've butted heads with EVERYONE in my fam that heard we weren't going to do it (the only exception was my FIL and his wife.) I've definitely heard it all from my VERY OLD Fashioned grandparents (grandfather was in the Navy) about how he will just be dirty etc. etc.
I just had to keep telling him, "well, it is my child, and therefore I will make the decisions regarding his genitals, and it really isn't any of your concern." After bout the 10th time my grandmother told him to cool it, and leave it alone.

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#3 of 142 Old 04-06-2009, 10:28 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Congratulations on your son! It's sure a pro-circ climate here, isn't it? Hopefully the state will stop offering medicaid coverage for circs and the number will go down.

To be honest, I cringe each time someone is pregnant at my church and hope that they have a girl because the myths about circ are so entrenched around here I'm afraid that even if I could work up the courage to talk to them, they'll circ anyway.

There were four pregnant women in my church this year and I prayed that I would have a boy and they would have girls--not only because I really wanted a boy but also because I knew that he would be safe from circ by being born into our home! Out of the other women, I'm pretty sure that one of them had already circ'ed her older sons, so if this baby was a boy it probably would've gotten cut too. But the other three are all having girls and I got my boy.
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#4 of 142 Old 04-06-2009, 10:34 PM
 
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I'm in MI and personally know 3 intact boys besides my ds

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#5 of 142 Old 04-06-2009, 10:44 PM
 
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So IL mom here and I don't know anyone near me who left their son(s) intact (aside from my mw who lives an hr away from me )
I actually tell people anytime I get a chance too (just because I'm curious about their own sons) and usually end up getting looked at like I'm somewhat crazy for not chopping my son
Almost always I get the response about it "just being so much easier/cleaner"
Everyone I talk to seems to think that you have to go through the extra effort of pulling things back at every butt change "so it doesn't get infected"
I acutally don't mind them responding that way because I'm ALWAYS quick to point out the err in that assumption
It's no wonder the US has such a large number of "medically necessary" circumcisions with so many parents/caregivers pulling on parts they should simply leave alone
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#6 of 142 Old 04-06-2009, 10:48 PM
 
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You are certainly not alone. I have 2 intact boys and honestly, know of very few circ'ed boys in my social circle ( I think there is a pair of brothers from one family and that is it).

My social circle is certainly not the majority of my community, but there is a significant minority of intact boys here (SW MI).

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#7 of 142 Old 04-06-2009, 11:16 PM
 
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I no longer live in the Midwest, but I did when my son was born, and he is intact! I lived in Iowa at the time.
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#8 of 142 Old 04-06-2009, 11:21 PM
 
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my 3 yr old is keepin it real, AND intact, in Ohio
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#9 of 142 Old 04-06-2009, 11:37 PM
 
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I'm from circ central - Kansas.

We have one intact little boy and another on the way! Woohoo!
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#10 of 142 Old 04-06-2009, 11:57 PM
 
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We're in North Central Ohio (about the same distance from both Cleveland and Akron-Canton) and have an 11 month old intact son.

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#11 of 142 Old 04-06-2009, 11:58 PM
 
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De-lurking to add, central IL here. I dont know anyone personally who hasn't circ'd their boys. It is so frustrating. A friend of dh's is having a boy in June and I gave her a copy of What Your Dr May Not Tell You about Circ, and I am hoping she reads it. I really want to be happy for them, and I dont think I can be if they hurt their baby kwim?

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#12 of 142 Old 04-07-2009, 07:40 AM
 
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I have 3 boys, the oldest one born in Germany, the 2 younger ones born in MI. They are all intact, but then, with my first son this wasn't "intactivism" - it was just normal. We don't do routine "medical" circumcision in Germany.
So, when I lived in MI, I had the pediatrician take a note in our file that I didn't want my sons circumsized.
I was really shocked back then, I will never forget when I changed a friend's son's diaper.

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#13 of 142 Old 04-07-2009, 07:54 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by sadean View Post
You are certainly not alone. I have 2 intact boys and honestly, know of very few circ'ed boys in my social circle ( I think there is a pair of brothers from one family and that is it).

My social circle is certainly not the majority of my community, but there is a significant minority of intact boys here (SW MI).
That's fantastic! I live in South-central MI, about 30 minutes from the Indiana border.

It's good to hear from other mamas with intact boys. Sometimes it feels like almost everybody circ's their boys around here. My son's doctor said that he sees mostly circ'ed.
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#14 of 142 Old 04-07-2009, 07:59 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by Nicole B View Post
So IL mom here and I don't know anyone near me who left their son(s) intact (aside from my mw who lives an hr away from me )
I actually tell people anytime I get a chance too (just because I'm curious about their own sons) and usually end up getting looked at like I'm somewhat crazy for not chopping my son
Almost always I get the response about it "just being so much easier/cleaner"
Everyone I talk to seems to think that you have to go through the extra effort of pulling things back at every butt change "so it doesn't get infected"
I acutally don't mind them responding that way because I'm ALWAYS quick to point out the err in that assumption
It's no wonder the US has such a large number of "medically necessary" circumcisions with so many parents/caregivers pulling on parts they should simply leave alone
Yeah, no kidding. My mom and my MIL both didn't know that you're not supposed to retract and clean it. Of course, my mom had only girls and my MIL circ'ed her boys.

I hate it, though, to think that people circ based on the assumption that intact care is so hard, when it's not, kwim?
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#15 of 142 Old 04-07-2009, 08:45 AM
 
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Iowa here. I have two grown intact sons.
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#16 of 142 Old 04-07-2009, 08:46 AM
 
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Originally Posted by BlessedMommy2006 View Post
Yeah, no kidding. My mom and my MIL both didn't know that you're not supposed to retract and clean it. Of course, my mom had only girls and my MIL circ'ed her boys.

I hate it, though, to think that people circ based on the assumption that intact care is so hard, when it's not, kwim?
Keep in mind how hard it was to get good information then. I mean it should seem obvious (especially to the Doctors) but we are looking at it with a better perspective.
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#17 of 142 Old 04-07-2009, 09:46 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Keep in mind how hard it was to get good information then. I mean it should seem obvious (especially to the Doctors) but we are looking at it with a better perspective.
Yeah, you're right. Too bad the doctors didn't give out better information. I mean, I might be tempted to circ too, if I thought that intact care was as laborious as they describe. It tires me out just hearing people talk about pulling back the foreskin at every diaper change.

I think that part of the reason why I didn't circ my son (other than all the classic reasons) is that I am lazy. I mean really, dealing with post-op care when I'm already irrational and sleep deprived, preventing adhesions for possibly years on end, and possibly dealing with meatal stenosis and all the headache that entails. ROFL.
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#18 of 142 Old 04-07-2009, 11:10 AM
 
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I live in Tulsa, OK. I ~know~ it's generally put into the Southern stats, but honestly I don't see how. I don't know anyone my kids ages that is intact (except my MW's ds). I know that ds's dad's family circs. My brothers all are My sons: intact. Now, I know 1 man (xh) who is, and know of one other who I was told was (girl talk )

I'm from TN, and from what I know of boys there, it's very common. All my nephews are.

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#19 of 142 Old 04-07-2009, 11:47 AM
 
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Not close to you but still midwest. The circ rate is high here My only consolation at the moment is that a few years back the local NOCIRC was successfull in getting circ removed as a covered surgery for Medicare (or whatever the state's health assistance plan is called).

To give you another inkling of how pro-circ it is here, I am the local office for the MGM bill. I sent letters to all my reps in January for the bill and have not had one response from any of them.

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#20 of 142 Old 04-07-2009, 11:49 AM
 
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I'm in MN with 2 intact sons. My cousin has an intact boy, too.

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#21 of 142 Old 04-07-2009, 12:08 PM
 
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I'm in KY, my 3 year old son is intact, never had a comment or problem from anybody although they did ask us about 5 times at the hospital when he was born "are you sure you don't want him circumcised?"
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#22 of 142 Old 04-07-2009, 12:10 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm in KY, my 3 year old son is intact, never had a comment or problem from anybody although they did ask us about 5 times at the hospital when he was born "are you sure you don't want him circumcised?"
Wow! Did you ever send a complaint form in to them for them soliciting you for unnecessary surgery?
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#23 of 142 Old 04-07-2009, 12:24 PM
 
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I'm in SE Michigan and am due to give birth to a son in August. I'm happy to say that this forum really helped me make the case to my DH about not circing our baby, and giving me plenty of information to counter arguments I've (already!) gotten into about it with people.
I find it shocking that "are you having him circumcised?" is one of the first questions I get when I tell people we're having a boy. Why is everyone so interested in his penis??
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#24 of 142 Old 04-07-2009, 12:27 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm in SE Michigan and am due to give birth to a son in August. I'm happy to say that this forum really helped me make the case to my DH about not circing our baby, and giving me plenty of information to counter arguments I've (already!) gotten into about it with people.
I find it shocking that "are you having him circumcised?" is one of the first questions I get when I tell people we're having a boy. Why is everyone so interested in his penis??
Congratulations on your boy! Yeah, it's kind of interesting, isn't it? Why is it that no one asked me if I was circ'ing my girl?
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#25 of 142 Old 04-07-2009, 12:31 PM
 
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I live in Wyoming now (which isn't technically the Midwest, but still high circ rates), but my kids were born in NY. No matter where they were born though, they'd not be circ'd.

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#26 of 142 Old 04-07-2009, 12:38 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I live in Wyoming now (which isn't technically the Midwest, but still high circ rates), but my kids were born in NY. No matter where they were born though, they'd not be circ'd.
Yay! Me too. I told my MIL that even if the circ rate was 99% (which it isn't, but just an example), I still wasn't doing it.
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#27 of 142 Old 04-07-2009, 12:39 PM
 
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Indiana here w/6mo intact ds!! He ended up in the nicu for his 1st month & i can't count the number of times we heard 'are u getting him circ'd? or will he be circ'd? ugh...his birth defect was in his esophagus, NOT his penis, people!!!
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#28 of 142 Old 04-07-2009, 12:52 PM
 
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I'm in Pittsburgh and I have 2 intact boys! I was surprised to see how many intact boys I know in real life too!

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#29 of 142 Old 04-07-2009, 01:12 PM
 
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De-lurking to add, central IL here. I dont know anyone personally who hasn't circ'd their boys. It is so frustrating. A friend of dh's is having a boy in June and I gave her a copy of What Your Dr May Not Tell You about Circ, and I am hoping she reads it. I really want to be happy for them, and I dont think I can be if they hurt their baby kwim?
I totally know what you mean. I no longer live in Central IL, but that's where I'm from. I'm lucky that my family hasn't asked a lot of questions about circ, but in a way it makes sense... sometimes it seems strange to me that other people are so concerned about my baby's genitals, you know?

I totally get what you mean about finding it hard to be happy for your friends if you know they're going to hurt their baby.

Have you seen the updated user agreement yet?
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#30 of 142 Old 04-07-2009, 01:57 PM
 
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I am in NE Ohio and am proud to have an intact 19mth old son The only other person I am close to and has intact DSs is my MW. She has 4 boys, but the first she circed out of ignorance and says she really regrets it My brother and dad are also intact (dad died when I was 11 though). Even with some guys in my immediate family, I STILL got grief from my mom and sister (who circed her two boys). I am happy I stood my ground though and didnt cut my son. He is perfect in every way. And DH is totally supportive. After reading everything, he is quite p!ssed at his mom for circing him!

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