If you regret circumcising your son(s), please post here. - Page 13 - Mothering Forums

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#361 of 729 Old 10-16-2007, 01:22 AM
 
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Jenna! I'm thrilled your with us!
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#362 of 729 Old 10-16-2007, 01:28 AM
 
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i had my son circd, i am so guilt ridden about it now i can't stand it.

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#363 of 729 Old 10-16-2007, 01:54 AM
 
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Originally Posted by granolapunk View Post
i had my son circd, i am so guilt ridden about it now i can't stand it.
My first ds was circ'd too. : When you know better you do better. It sucks for us to feel this unrelenting guilt that haunts us but just know that ppl who have circ'd their ds's and do not yet feel remorse, you can be an advocate for their future ds's. They're likely to listen to us. Love on that baby boy of yours mama... I know what your going through.: When the time is right, your dh or you can suggest restoration. Thats what we plan to do for our ds.
In the mean time, allow your self to heal and the best way I've found to do that is through saving other boys. The activism does wonders!

~FW
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#364 of 729 Old 10-16-2007, 10:17 AM
 
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My two sons are both circumcized. I deeply regret doing so. I had done no research on this topic, and had left this one decision up to dad. ( I don't blame him, he is uninformed about this topic as well.) I had the most trouble with son #2. The skin kept wanting to re-attach itself, even if I cleaned it daily. I had to then pull the skin apart a little, otherwise it would be pulled too taut, and cause pain. Not to mention look deformed.
Also, with both boys after the circ was performed, fell into a deep sleep and it was hard to rouse either to nurse.
I guess the other thing that bothered me was the doctor came in wanting to perform the circ while I was in the middle of nursing. I had really just started nursing, and because I asked her to come back, she said she could not do it that day, and was a witch about it. So, I became passive and allowed her to perform the circ, even though my baby had not gotten to eat. I will regret that decision forever. I was so proud of myself for having a healthy, problem-free pregnancy. I was in labor two hours, pushed four times, medicine free...and then I folded when it came to this. Please at least research before you make your decision. The lady before shows a lot of research that one needs to read about. Good luck!
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#365 of 729 Old 10-16-2007, 10:39 PM
 
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I came to this thread for the first time about 8 months ago and it has taken me this long to be able to post my story. I know it will be long, but I think it will be healing to get it out.

When I was pg I never really connected with the baby. We wanted a baby, but I know it didn’t really “get” what having a baby meant, although I guess that can be said of all first time moms to a degree. We didn’t find out the gender, although I was sure it was a girl. Some things I researched (sort of) like how to have a drug-free birth. I never even glanced at vaxes, figured the doc wouldn’t recommend it if it wasn’t the best for our child. And I never looked into circumcision either, I figured since dh had a penis he could decide, and trusting that the doctor knew best again.

After he was born and nursing and I could touch him, I think I was in shock. It took me a week before it hit me that no one was going to take him away if I screwed up, taking care of him was solely up to me and dh. Too bad I didn’t have that realization earlier. . .

He was 24 hrs old. We wanted to go home early but they said they couldn’t do the circ until he was 24 hrs, so we stayed until they could do it. We both went in with him. I know I had the attitude that it was best for him, it would hurt and all but we were doing what was best. Hah. I wish I had known. He cried when they strapped him down. I stroked his arm and talked to him. He was so small and tiny, so frail on the board. Big round chest and belly, little arms grasping out for me. He was just learning how to breathe, how to nurse, how to stay warm. He was supposed to be learning that the world is a safe, warm, loving place where his needs would be met. Instead he was strapped to a cold, hard board and was about to be scarred on the most personal, intimate, vulnerable level. Safe world indeed. He screamed when they gave him the shots of anesthesia. The doc waited a bit and poked him with something, I can’t remember what, to make sure he was numb. He was. The doc brought out this clamp thing with dials and two parts. . . I can’t remember exactly how it went, but I know I was surprised and had a sinking feeling when I saw how forcefully he had to pull the foreskin back with the tools that he had. I thought it would pull back easily and maybe be like trimming some extra skin from an earlobe or something, I have no idea what I thought. The thought popped into my head that maybe we didn't really have to do this, it seemed so harsh and extreme. But I kept pressing my feelings aside, reminding myself that we were doing what was best for him. I wouldn’t let myself feel doubt, pushed back any tears that were thinking of starting. The doc finally got the foreskin loose, put on the clamp, and cut off the skin that was sticking out. Then he stood back, crossed his arms easily, and started chatting with us about the weather or something stupid. Deep down I was crying out “The weather? Look at what you’re doing to my baby, this is serious! See him laying here, sprawled out on the table with that huge metal thing stuck on him! And you want to talk about the weather?!?!?!” I talked to ds and stroked his arm, ignoring the crying out coming from deep within me. After awhile the doc took off the clamp, checked the circ, put some ointment and gauze on it, and told us we were free to go. There was no bleeding, just a lot of redness. They said he'd be sore, and I was careful when I changed his diaper but sometimes he would cry and I'd think "Oh, poor guy, you're still sore". And now I think back on it and realize he wasn't sore! He was in horrible pain! How awful he must have felt after the anesthesia wore off! Geez I needed pain relievers for a few days after slicing my finger and needing stitches. And they cut off the most senstitive part of him, that must have ached horribly for ages! Did I give him any pain reliever? No, afterall, he was just a little sore. My poor baby! All the pain I put you through, and I had no idea, all for no good reason!

So we went home. And I really never even thought of it, except those few times when, at the age of 3 or 4, he would say “Mama, it hurts when my penis gets big”. And then I read the article in Mothering about FGM, and it said something to the effect of “You may think you’re doing your part by being an intactavist for boys in the US. . .” and I was shocked. How could you even compare the two? One is horrible mutilation done to girls, and the other is no big deal and done to boys. People have been circing boys since forever. And then I started reading. And crying. And regretting it with every fiber of my being exactly what I did to my precious boy, what I took away from him without permission. And fearing that they took off too much and that’s why it hurts him to have an erection sometimes. And just disgusted at the whole stupid practice and propaganda and MARKET!?!? for foreskins, and that nobody told me there was a reason for the foreskin and he would have been better keeping it, and disgusted at myself for not realizing that if he was born with it then there was probably a purpose for it.

We have another little one coming in March. We don’t know for sure but I think he’s a boy. He will be born at home, away from the needles and scalpels and tiny little boards where they strap babies down and take away important body parts without a thought. He will remain peaceful and intact. And I will explain to my older son, who will be 5, that we just didn’t know and did what we thought was best for him. And hope he forgives me. I have realized that I put a wall up between us that day, in an attempt to not feel all the excruciating pain that I was putting him through. Now that I've realized it's there I'm trying to tear it down. But we've already lost so much time, all because of a stupid, uneducated decision. One that will affect him the rest of his life, even if he never has "problems" from it.
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#366 of 729 Old 10-17-2007, 09:42 AM
 
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thank you for your stories

"Parents are simply trustees; they do not own the bodies of their children"-Norm Cohen  Martial arts instructor intactlact.gifhomebirth.jpgnak.gif and mom to 4: DD1 (1/05) DS (7/06) DD2 (5/08) DD3 (2/11)
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#367 of 729 Old 10-17-2007, 12:24 PM
 
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Originally Posted by mysweetw&e View Post
I will explain to my older son, who will be 5, that we just didn’t know and did what we thought was best for him. And hope he forgives me.
As with anything unfortunate or regrettable, there is grieving to work through. It looks like you have put in the effort to start moving on. I hate that I'm cut, and 7 years after I discovered restoration I still grieve in spurts occassionally, but you just have to look ahead and live your best life from this day on. Smile.

-Ron

-Ron
HIS body, HIS decision.
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#368 of 729 Old 10-17-2007, 06:52 PM
 
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I came to this thread for the first time about 8 months ago and it has taken me this long to be able to post my story. I know it will be long, but I think it will be healing to get it out.
What a powerful story. Thank you for sharing it here. I hope that it educates anyone considering circumcision in the future.
And congratulations on the upcoming birth of your new baby!

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#369 of 729 Old 10-17-2007, 09:21 PM
 
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Thanks for the replies. I keep adding bits and pieces because I feel like it's missing something, like it doesn't do the experience justice, for either of us. I would love if it educated someone in the future and saved a little boy.

I am healing, thank you. The fact that I could actually write it out shows just how far I've come. I feel more like I can move on now.

And thanks for the congrats! Actually I think this little one has helped push me towards healing more. There are things I need to take care of before he/she enters the world, yk?
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#370 of 729 Old 10-17-2007, 10:46 PM
 
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There are other boards if you (or others) are interested in sharing your stories.

This is a powerful thread, I always wish I could link to it on other boards, especially with mpms that are receptive or feeling pressured. I KNOW how much it helped me.

((hugs))

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Dhprivateeyes.gif, Joshua rolleyes.gif Rebeccagrouphug.gifand dog2.gif.    candle.gif for Laura
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#371 of 729 Old 10-22-2007, 08:18 PM
 
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blOUCH! they weblog for Project Ouch! collects and archives stories like the ones in this thread. Please, post your stories there, too: blOUCH!
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#372 of 729 Old 11-15-2007, 12:17 PM
 
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My son's foreskin keeps reattaching, should I let it? The Ped keeps retracting it. It all seeems wrong. What would be the problem with letting it reattach itself and leaving it alone? I regret it anyway!
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#373 of 729 Old 11-15-2007, 12:27 PM
 
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My son's foreskin keeps reattaching, should I let it? The Ped keeps retracting it. It all seeems wrong. What would be the problem with letting it reattach itself and leaving it alone? I regret it anyway!


Generally our advice is to leave it alone. But there are two routes you can go. Ripping back the skin is very painful for the boy and also risks bleeding and infection. You could leave it alone (and there are numerous studies showing that most adhesions release on their own by puberty and require no forcing.

The other route you could take is to not let the reahere by applying vaseline. However, if you choose to go this method, you may be applying vaseline for 1-2 years.

For this reason and the risks of adhesions still reforming, we usually recommend you go with path A and just leave it alone.

"Parents are simply trustees; they do not own the bodies of their children"-Norm Cohen  Martial arts instructor intactlact.gifhomebirth.jpgnak.gif and mom to 4: DD1 (1/05) DS (7/06) DD2 (5/08) DD3 (2/11)
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#374 of 729 Old 11-15-2007, 12:29 PM
 
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My son's foreskin keeps reattaching, should I let it? The Ped keeps retracting it. It all seeems wrong. What would be the problem with letting it reattach itself and leaving it alone? I regret it anyway!
You should repost this question as a new thread on the regular CAC board to get as many knowledgeable responses as possible.

In the meantime. Is you son circed? If he is what your ped is doing could cause him more damage. How old is your son. Forcible retracting is ALWAYS a bad idea.
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#375 of 729 Old 11-15-2007, 04:12 PM
 
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OK which forum and how exactly do I get there?
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#376 of 729 Old 11-15-2007, 04:16 PM
 
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the page that you found this thread on, just scroll down a bit to the actual threads section (this is the stickie section- threads that get pinned so they dont disappear onto other pages). There's a button for "new thread" also just above the stickie section.

"Parents are simply trustees; they do not own the bodies of their children"-Norm Cohen  Martial arts instructor intactlact.gifhomebirth.jpgnak.gif and mom to 4: DD1 (1/05) DS (7/06) DD2 (5/08) DD3 (2/11)
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#377 of 729 Old 11-15-2007, 04:17 PM
 
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Thank you
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#378 of 729 Old 11-16-2007, 06:54 PM
 
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I wish I knew the answer to that too. Can you just let it reattatch? I need schooling!
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#379 of 729 Old 11-26-2007, 11:08 AM
 
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My son was circumcised. I didn't want him to be, but I let it happen. The guilt is killing me. I really make myself nauseous by thinking about it. I don't think I can get over it, ever. I HURTS SO BAD TO KNOW THAT I HURT MY BABY. I wish I could fix it. I'd do anything to fix it.

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#380 of 729 Old 11-26-2007, 01:28 PM
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My son was circumcised. I didn't want him to be, but I let it happen. The guilt is killing me. I really make myself nauseous by thinking about it. I don't think I can get over it, ever. I HURTS SO BAD TO KNOW THAT I HURT MY BABY. I wish I could fix it. I'd do anything to fix it.
Oh mama, I know that feeling.
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#381 of 729 Old 12-04-2007, 04:35 PM
 
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I just returned from the urologist with my three year old. I have been sick to my stomach since. After losing the circ. arguement with my dh, we have been asking his ped. about his penis not popping out of the skin since he was an infant. I switched all of the kids to a new family doctor in July and at my son's three year well check, he referred him to the urologist. He has surgery to remove adhesions on January 23. He'll have to have at least three more surgeries to repair the damage done by the circ. I only agreed to getting him circ'd in the first place to avoid him having to have it done later in life, as so many people pointed out would be more traumatic for him. I can't begin to explain how awful I feel. I regretted his circ. right away but now, this is the worst feeling I can imagine. I allowd him to be hurt as a newborn in hopes of preventing future procedures and he has to have those procedures anyway. Not to mention the fact that it is now causing him to have to delay potty training and preschool, which he is anxious to start. Regret is a huge burden to have to carry when it comes to your children...
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#382 of 729 Old 12-04-2007, 05:14 PM
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I just returned from the urologist with my three year old. I have been sick to my stomach since. After losing the circ. arguement with my dh, we have been asking his ped. about his penis not popping out of the skin since he was an infant. I switched all of the kids to a new family doctor in July and at my son's three year well check, he referred him to the urologist. He has surgery to remove adhesions on January 23. He'll have to have at least three more surgeries to repair the damage done by the circ. I only agreed to getting him circ'd in the first place to avoid him having to have it done later in life, as so many people pointed out would be more traumatic for him. I can't begin to explain how awful I feel. I regretted his circ. right away but now, this is the worst feeling I can imagine. I allowd him to be hurt as a newborn in hopes of preventing future procedures and he has to have those procedures anyway. Not to mention the fact that it is now causing him to have to delay potty training and preschool, which he is anxious to start. Regret is a huge burden to have to carry when it comes to your children...



at three years old your sons adhesions do not need to be broke.you do not need to have surgery on him.a unretractable foreskin is normal at this age.
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#383 of 729 Old 12-04-2007, 05:34 PM
 
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The reason they are revoming the adhesions is that there was too much outer skin romoved during his circ and now the inner skin has adhered, it's turned inside out and burried his penis inside. There is a very noticeable scar when you push the extra skin back enough to see his penis. It's adhered so badly that it's preventing his penis from coming out of the skin as it grows and it's stuck inside the skin quite a bit. He's started to complain about it being painful and has said his "wee-wee can't open" more than once. He's also starting to hold it and pee massive amounts all at once, we are thinking because it's shoved up so far now that it's become difficult to pee. It's just a mess. My nephew has normal adhesions and my sister and I have discussed him not needing anything done with them but I think my son's situation is extreme and unusual.
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#384 of 729 Old 12-04-2007, 05:36 PM
 
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I just returned from the urologist with my three year old. I have been sick to my stomach since. After losing the circ. arguement with my dh, we have been asking his ped. about his penis not popping out of the skin since he was an infant. I switched all of the kids to a new family doctor in July and at my son's three year well check, he referred him to the urologist. He has surgery to remove adhesions on January 23. He'll have to have at least three more surgeries to repair the damage done by the circ. I only agreed to getting him circ'd in the first place to avoid him having to have it done later in life, as so many people pointed out would be more traumatic for him. I can't begin to explain how awful I feel. I regretted his circ. right away but now, this is the worst feeling I can imagine. I allowd him to be hurt as a newborn in hopes of preventing future procedures and he has to have those procedures anyway. Not to mention the fact that it is now causing him to have to delay potty training and preschool, which he is anxious to start. Regret is a huge burden to have to carry when it comes to your children...
, Mama. I'm so, so sorry.

As tlh has said, though, your son most likely does not need any further surgery. Taking off more skin will cause more damage.

The majority of circed boys (70%) experience adhesions. In most cases, these adhesions will release on their own as the boy gets older. The adhesions are the body's way of trying to heal itself - it is reattaching, because the foreskin is supposed to be attached to the glans in infancy/into childhood (and into the teenage years for some boys).

If these adhesions are left alone, they will release on their own - just as they would have if your son was intact. Conservative treatment is almost always the best option...

I'd recommend that you get in touch with a foreskin-friendly/knowledgeable doctor for a second opinion. Or perhaps get in touch with Marilyn Milos - she is always happy to help parents in these situations. I'm sure a second official medical opinion would reassure you that further surgery is not necessary, but you really need to find a doctor who is not pro-circ (because their answer to problems caused by cutting is invariably more cutting )
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#385 of 729 Old 12-04-2007, 05:36 PM
 
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sounds like he may need some help to take care of all that is going on. Let us know how he does.

"Parents are simply trustees; they do not own the bodies of their children"-Norm Cohen  Martial arts instructor intactlact.gifhomebirth.jpgnak.gif and mom to 4: DD1 (1/05) DS (7/06) DD2 (5/08) DD3 (2/11)
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#386 of 729 Old 12-04-2007, 05:39 PM
 
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After reading your second post, it sounds very much like your son will probably need more help than the usual "just leave it alone" type of adhesions. I would definitely get a second opinion, though, and I would really make sure that the doc explains to you EXACTLY what s/he is going to do and EXACTLY why.

I'm so, so, so sorry that your son is going through this.
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#387 of 729 Old 12-04-2007, 05:40 PM
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, Mama. I'm so, so sorry.

As tlh has said, though, your son most likely does not need any further surgery. Taking off more skin will cause more damage...
I totally agree.
I'm very sorry for your little one...
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#388 of 729 Old 12-04-2007, 05:45 PM
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I'd recommend that you get in touch with a foreskin-friendly/knowledgeable doctor for a second opinion. Or perhaps get in touch with Marilyn Milos - she is always happy to help parents in these situations. I'm sure a second official medical opinion would reassure you that further surgery is not necessary, but you really need to find a doctor who is not pro-circ (because their answer to problems caused by cutting is invariably more cutting )

:
you can also contact Doctors Opposing Circumcision
http://www.doctorsopposingcircumcisi...t/contact.html
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#389 of 729 Old 12-04-2007, 05:46 PM
 
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The reason they are revoming the adhesions is that there was too much outer skin romoved during his circ and now the inner skin has adhered, it's turned inside out and burried his penis inside. There is a very noticeable scar when you push the extra skin back enough to see his penis. It's adhered so badly that it's preventing his penis from coming out of the skin as it grows and it's stuck inside the skin quite a bit. He's started to complain about it being painful and has said his "wee-wee can't open" more than once. He's also starting to hold it and pee massive amounts all at once, we are thinking because it's shoved up so far now that it's become difficult to pee. It's just a mess. My nephew has normal adhesions and my sister and I have discussed him not needing anything done with them but I think my son's situation is extreme and unusual.
I don't know if this helps but ds1 had a buried penis due to the ever zealous circumcision. He would SCREAM while holding his penis telling us his penis hurt. The uro said he has meatal stenosis. Could you rule out that? Surgery may be necessary for meatal stenosis. Its only prevalent in circumcised boys. I'm so sorry for what you guys are going through.
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#390 of 729 Old 12-04-2007, 05:54 PM
 
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http://www.mothering.com/discussions...=1#post9913459

Thought you had started this thread here-- lots of good answers

---feeling like an emu on acid---
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