Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: state of confusion
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Reading some of these posts makes me cry! My ds1 was circed. I was 22 when I gave birth, I knew nothing about it really. I tried to research it, but there was so much conflicting stuff out there. So I took the easy way out and let my ex decide. I mean, he was a man after all. In my gut, I didnt want to do it, but everyone said he'd get infected, have to have it done later blahblah...stuff I now know to be untrue. So we did it. DS went on a nursing strike for a day or so. I asked my ex later why he chose to do it, expecting some well thought out answer backed by research and personal philosophy. What did I get? "Because it was done to me". That brought me up short. What kind of answer was that? Lots of things were done to me that I'd never do to another person. That plastic ring thats suppose to just fall off on its own when its all healed? Yeah, well, part of the skin grew back around that so most of it was trying to come off but it was held down in that one spot so it was rubbing back and forth. He was three days old and screaming like you wouldnt believe, nothing worked. Finally when I took his diaper off to check his temp (on docs orders, armpit wasnt good enough), he stopped crying then I saw his poor little penis. We had to go get it RECLIPPED and this time, unlike the first time, I was there and saw his reaction, had to hold him to have it done and it had to be done to get the ring off (the plastibell). It was horrible. Tell me they dont feel pain, what a crock of sh%^. I was using sposies, but had to go to cloth diapers cuz his wound (yes, red, raw and oozing) would stick to the disposible diapers and hurt. Cloth didnt bother him.
Anyway, fast forward several years when I went back to school and Im taking an anthropology course where we cover female genital mutilation and Im horrified and disbeleiving and ask how anyone could let that happen to thier child, much less participate in it! The prof tells me because they honestly believe <list of stupid reasons>. And it hit me physically right in the gut that those are the same reasons WE give for male circumcision and that Europeans much see us as barbaric and horrific as I was seeing these people. Ouch. I swore then and there I'd never circ another baby. And I felt so guilty for letting it happen to my first.
Luckily, my current dh is intact and there was never a question or an argument and we used a midwife, no hospital, so I didnt have to argue with anyone to keep ds2 intact. But I would have. Oh, boy, would I have! Well, I did argue with my mom, but she had no power to enforce her opinion thankfully and after reading some literature I gave her from the birthing centers waiting room, she has completely changed her mind.
~Me, mama to soapbox boy (1991), photo girl (1997), gadget girl (2003), jungle boy (2005), fan boy (2003) and twirly girl (2011). Twenty years of tree hugging, breastfeeding, cosleeping, unschooling, craziness