Just my late night musings and ramblings - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
Old 02-10-2004, 01:41 AM - Thread Starter
 
Evergreen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Where all the women are strong
Posts: 5,295
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
A friend of mine just found out she is having a baby boy today. I haven't talked to her yet, but a mutual friend informed me. I can't even be happy for her right now, because I know she will circumsize him. I have friends who have circed their boys and don't have this sadness, and almost animosity toward them. I am still planning on giving her anticirc info, not that it will make a difference. I am upset that he is gonna be cut, but I am also upset about feeling this way. I don't think it is healthy to obsess over someone else's unborn child like this. I can't help it, though, maybe I just need my own time to greive and heal. Nevertheless, I am sickened that she and her husband can't see the stupidit in their choice. Maybe, tomorrow I will feel better about the whole thing. I know they are deeply excited to have a boy, and I do want to be happy for them, I just don't get it.

Evergreen- Loving my girls Dylan dust.gifage8, Ava energy.gifage 4 and baby Georgia baby.gif (6/3/11).

Evergreen is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Old 02-10-2004, 04:01 AM
 
Quirky's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Princeton, NJ
Posts: 11,770
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
All you can do is try. I totally know where you're coming from. I obsessed for months about my SIL's baby (turned out to be a girl) and I've got several others, born and unborn, to obsess and stress out about too.

I think having had a baby boy myself, and seeing how perfect he is intact, and knowing how much pain circ causes,and how much physical and sexual damage, I want to spare other baby boys I know or will know that pain.

Come visit the NEW QuirkyBaby website -- earn QB Bucks rewards points for purchases, reviews, referrals, and more! Free US shipping on great brands of baby slings and carriers and FREE BabyLegs or babywearing mirror on orders of $100+. Take the QB Quiz for personalized advice!

Quirky is offline  
Old 02-10-2004, 01:21 PM
 
calngavinsmom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Ontario Canada....EH!?!
Posts: 1,992
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I know EXACTLY what you are talking about. I go through those feelings whenever I learn someone I know is expecting a boy(or if they don't know the sex). My best friend had a boy, I knew they would circ and I never felt a moment of joy for them. Nice friend eh?

When she had her daughter and I had my son, we had invited each other to the hospital to see the babies the day after the births. With her son, I got no invite because that was his "surgery" day. I was at work on that day and felt very sad for the little guy.

Good luck with your friend, I hope you do better than how I did with mine.

Take care,
Tara

Tara Momma to Callum and Gavin
calngavinsmom is offline  
Old 02-10-2004, 04:36 PM
 
Ilaria's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Currently living in Beijing, China
Posts: 2,460
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
I know EXACTLY what you are talking about. I go through those feelings whenever I learn someone I know is expecting a boy(or if they don't know the sex).
I could have written that myself.

Ilaria mamma to Owen, Caroline & Patrick .... loving life as expats in Asia intactlact.gifnovaxnocirc.gifuc.jpgnamaste.gif
Ilaria is offline  
Old 02-10-2004, 09:41 PM
 
MonicaS's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: FL Suncoast
Posts: 792
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I could have written your post, exactly. I have 3 PG friends right now that willl circ if they have boys. One of them is def having a boy. I couldn't be happy when I heard it was a boy. I haven't seen her yet, but I know I will HAVE to bring it up. She has 2 kids already, the oldest is a circ boy.

My feelings of her being a half heartedly trying, giving up the first week type breastfeeder was bad enough when I found out he was PG again. This on top of it makes me so sad. She is very much a follower and will probably not take in one sentence I say about it.

I know it isn't right to obsess like this, but I can't help but envision her poor baby being hurt and robbed of his full body. I think the obsession has a little to do w/ the fact that there is still time to do something. The damage has not yet been done. I feel like there is still a chance to change their minds. Then after they go ahead and still have it done, I can't help but judge them. :
MonicaS is offline  
Old 02-10-2004, 10:55 PM
 
DesireeH's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Orange County, CA
Posts: 8,218
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Ditto! I could have written all your posts word for word. It's so sad.

Desiree

DesireeH is offline  
Old 02-10-2004, 11:49 PM
Banned
 
somemama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
Posts: 1,592
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally posted by Gr8flmom
I don't think it is healthy to obsess over someone else's unborn child like this.
Yes, your feelings are quite healthy. What's being done to these babies is unhealthy!
somemama is offline  
 
User Tag List

Thread Tools


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off