Feeling devastated and really just need support - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 10 Old 07-11-2010, 04:06 PM - Thread Starter
 
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My sister is in early labor with her son. She is planning on circumcising him.



I have done everything in my power. She will not listen.



This is like watching a car crash. I am devastated for him. My heart aches right now. I am sobbing. I don't understand how this is still legal.



I could say so much more, but all that really matters is that she is doing this, and I am powerless and helpless to save him.

wife - mother - midwife

CIRCUMCISION

The more you know, the worse it gets.

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#2 of 10 Old 07-11-2010, 04:30 PM
 
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i know how you feel - my SIL had her twins 6+ weeks early last june. after their time in the NICU, she had them cut.

you may feel powerless but perhaps there are things you can do to try to keep it from happening to others: make a donation to a place like intact america instead of or in addition to a baby gift, donate instead of b-day gifts, etc. (this is what i do for my nephews).

sus

Baby the babies while they're babies so they don't need babying for a lifetime.
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#3 of 10 Old 07-11-2010, 04:46 PM
 
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#4 of 10 Old 07-11-2010, 08:46 PM
 
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Originally Posted by mama24-7 View Post


i know how you feel - my SIL had her twins 6+ weeks early last june. after their time in the NICU, she had them cut.

you may feel powerless but perhaps there are things you can do to try to keep it from happening to others: make a donation to a place like intact america instead of or in addition to a baby gift, donate instead of b-day gifts, etc. (this is what i do for my nephews).
sus
You honestly don't buy your nephews birthday presents because they are circ'd?? How is it their fault?
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#5 of 10 Old 07-11-2010, 10:32 PM
 
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Originally Posted by mama24-7 View Post


i know how you feel - my SIL had her twins 6+ weeks early last june. after their time in the NICU, she had them cut.

you may feel powerless but perhaps there are things you can do to try to keep it from happening to others: make a donation to a place like intact america instead of or in addition to a baby gift, donate instead of b-day gifts, etc. (this is what i do for my nephews).

sus
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You honestly don't buy your nephews birthday presents because they are circ'd?? How is it their fault?
you didn't bold the part that i said "instead of or in addition to." these are children who recently turned one; even if i only made a donation in celebration of their birthdays or any other gift giving opportunity, it wouldn't matter to them . these are not children who will ever want for material things w/ the grandparents they have who show their amount of love by the amount spent on the gifts they give.

and, no, it's not their fault they were born of a woman who chose ignorance over bodily integrity. i think that one day they will thank me for making donations to try to stop the madness that was done to them before it's done to more innocent boys.

i'm glad you asked. i realized that i need to start keeping track of the money i've given for this reason.

sus

Baby the babies while they're babies so they don't need babying for a lifetime.
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#6 of 10 Old 07-11-2010, 11:23 PM
 
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:

~helen~ mama to 5 yo twins jonas and micah and my 2 yo baby boy eli
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#7 of 10 Old 07-12-2010, 12:17 AM
 
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It's hard knowing someone you love is about to be hurt so badly.

Melissa, wife to Brian, mommy to my home born, breastfeeding, sling-riding, sleep sharing, cloth diapered, intact kiddos Adam 11/09 and Leah 8/12.

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#8 of 10 Old 07-12-2010, 02:22 AM
 
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I'm sorry. My SIL circed my nephew also. All we can do is give the parents the info. After that, it's out of our hands. Who knows? Maybe your sis will have a change of heart when the time comes. Maybe as the doctor is giving informed consent and lists off the risks she will remember what you said and opt out of the circ.

Mom &  RN   intactivist.gif
Pardon the typos - CWOK (cat walking on keyboard)   signcirc1.gif

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#9 of 10 Old 07-12-2010, 04:02 AM
 
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maybe, just maybe after working so hard bringing him to the earth-side she will not want him hurt and her inner mama bear will emerge to protect her baby.

every mother will hear her inner instincts scream to say "NOOOOOO" .

this is instinctual. she will hear it!

Being culturally conditioned makes it hard to be strong enough to embrace what you hear and actually listen to those instincts. I just hope she has a strong healthy backbone.
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#10 of 10 Old 07-12-2010, 01:19 PM
 
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Hugs

My SIL actually deleted me from Facebook because she is so pro-circ. Confusingly enough, I very very very rarely post ANYTHING about circ. I guess just knowing I'm against it is too much for her to handle.

She and my brother have had two girls, and are going to have one more baby in about four or five years. I am an atheist, but I seriously plead with the universe nightly to give them another girl when the time goes. If they have a boy, I'll be in your shoes and I honestly don't know how I'll handle it.

treehugger.gif NMY, uber-crunchy, college student, doula-in-training, health food store worker and future librarian read.gif
                                      

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